AIBU to take sick leave when I am completely exhausted?

Not guaranteed to be available immediately

It sounds like studying alongside work is too much. I would look at putting this on hold before work. There are things that take priority over work (eg: health, family) but also things work should take priority over (eg: studying). I think I would judge a colleague who took time off work due to burn out but was continuing to fill their time with studying. Drop the course, obviously if after you’re dropped optional extras you’re still burnt out it would then be very reasonable to take time off work.

Book 2 weeks parental leave

I think you misunderstand me.

If she takes the time to rest and then returns to work in exactly the same circumstances, she’ll be in the same exhausted position again. She needs to be spending time thinking about what she can put in place to help so she can cope.

I don't disagree entirely, but recovery is a thing? Getting the rest you need to continue is just as valid as any other form of sickness or adjustment.

You describe your dh as brilliant but then go on to say he works away which can’t change, and also that he was utterly unsupportive, dismissive and downright nasty about the fact you’re getting knackered in your desk job.

is it possible you’re one of the too many women whose bar for men is so low that if they so much as push a baby on a swing for five minutes, they’re described as brilliant? Is your parenting 50/50?

I mean, maybe he’s great and just not very supportive here, or maybe he’s not great at all and the root of your exhaustion.

OP you sound unwell so taking off sick is perfectly normal. If you don't think so, could you use some AL?

I was going to suggest this, too. You sound completely swamped OP, be kind to yourself and look at what you can change, and what you can’t change and decide from there.
You can always pick up studying a little further down the line, it won’t disappear.
Take care of yourself first, always. 🌸

It sounds like you’re actually physically unwell, in that case sick leave is ok. Otherwise, if you just need some time off to recharge, that’s what annual leave is for.
You should also think about the long-term, if this is more than just a short-term issue then maybe working + studying + childcare + husband away just isn’t sustainable and you need to look at making changes.

You're ill now. You need time off now.

How do you think you're going to power through? You're only going to run yourself into the wall. What happens if you are so exhausted you physically can't get up in the morning cause you tried to power through it?

You need and deserve time off.

Ask your GP to sign you off OP, you sound burnt out and you’re not going to get better if you’re exhausted.

Drop the studying, take time off, rest and recover.

Why are you studying as well if you cant manage the burden of work and your family life? Maybe the must do’s would be more manageable if the studies went on hold until you feel better?

It sounds like you are ill, so you need time off.

However, if you take time off you shouldn’t be studying during that time as the fact that your OH works away, you have Sen kids and have chosen to study and work at the same time is not your workplace’s responsibility.

How would this solve anything? Especially if you need the money it could just make things much worse.

I think you need to get your eating issues resolved and concentrate on that. I also think that your DH needs to help more and maybe cut his own hours, or agree to you cutting yours. But you need a long term solution, not just to go off sick.

What would you do off sick anyway? If just sleep, can you leave your DH with the kids on his own at the weekend and camp in a hotel.

It can also be a bit stressful being on sick leave anyway, especially if you need regular sick notes and or your work have requirements to report in etc. I wouldn’t underestimate that.

Also if you can’t eat solids, have you tried liquid foods (I think places like Wiltshire farm do them) and iron supplements in liquid form?

Way to go @JudithsDead haha
What did you start on?

🤣 oh yes sorry @latetothefisting . Must stop drinking before 11.

I don’t understand your post.
This person was supporting the OP

I think you might have misread the post. She says it does sound like she is ill.

This.

One week won’t do anything.

Is this not what AL is for?

Take a week off, will you be better next week?

What are you studying, can you put it on hold for the time being?

@latetothefisting yes she sounds completely healthy what with the vomiting after eating anything and the no oxygen carrying capacity in her blood, lazy bitch.

Take the time off. I’d actually go further and suggest you see your GP and ask for a sick/fit note and take 2 weeks. Seriously.

I was in a similar situation last summer, powered through and ended up getting shingles and being very unwell. My immune system was shot to bits from never getting enough rest if any time to myself. I wish I’d taken even a few days off much earlier.

Agree with @Malasana - it is a temporary fix. Could you put the studying on hold for a little while until you resolve your medical problem?

It sounds like a day or two off would possibly help. But they have to be totally off. You can’t choose to take sick leave from work and still study. It sounds like you’ve bitten off more than you can chew and you have to decide your priorities for the longer term.