Taking daughters phone

Wtf.

Just been announced that the average Brit spends 5 years doom scrolling on a phone across a lifetime. 5 years. I wonder how long I spent riding my horse?

I'd be handing her a library card and telling her that since she can't be trusted with her phone, she'll have to revise the old fashioned way. The lying would ensure that she wasn't getting it back, at least not for a few months.

They all try the I hate you, shit. It's emotional manipulation.

Confiscate smart phone.
give her a dumb phone she can phone and text message on.
there is a reason SM is being banned for under 16s in many countries.

Normal behaviour at this age mine turns 13 next month and yes similar with the phone use also writing exams but she also uses it for revision

This. Our 13 year old son now has what can only described as dumb phone, as he could not be trusted to adhere to the rules. Social media is addictive, the sooner they ban it for under 16s the better.

She didn't believe in Santa or the Easter bunny at 11. She's very deliberately trying to manipulate you. You're doing the right thing. Maybe consider making it a dumb phone.

It’s all normal behaviour tbh attitude and pushing back.
but I’d be removing the phone when she baths and I speak from experience with my sd that it wasn’t being used to look at TikTok or read notes . She doesn’t need a mobile in a bathroom

I think you’ve overreacted here.

Said the teenager not getting her own way.

New rule, no phones upstairs. Old rules of mum asks you to take half an.hour then half an hour it is and loose the attitude. Any breach you turn her phone off remotely. If you don't have this set up as a parental control already do it. Teenage girls are always pushing boundaries and go through a really rude phase. They just need boundaries. It's tiresome but she'll thank you when she's older.

It’s quite eye opening isn’t it how so many parents are afraid of taking the phone of very young children

DD is not allowed her phone upstairs at all.

I pad for school work down stairs as well as much as poss.

Wow. Now I see where it’s all going wrong. So many of you think taking a phone away for so long is too harsh. Social media is so important. It really, really isn’t. 😢

Absolutely terrible advice. 13 year olds refusing to follow phone rules is dangerous. If she's being sneaky with it then it should be taken indefinitely.

Seems overly harsh taking her phone for so long. Very controlling following her around house too. I would choose your battles and leave the extended punishment for something awful

Check the phone. Not just a quick flick through, really forensically check it. There are apps that look like something else (a calculator app) but are actually something totally different.

It's very concerning that she wants it with her in the bath and she could be sending photos of herself. You said she just uses netflix and stuff, how are you sure, what controls are on it?

Why does she have a fully smart phone at age 13?

Good on you for giving her a break without it.

Enforce new rules - one being that all phones are in a box downstairs by 8 pm, yours included.

No phones in bathrooms.

Put a timer in the bathroom with an alarm. Agree to a reasonable time for bathing (half an hour) and showering (ten minutes) to be out of the bathroom - allowing for other family members to use the same bathroom.

Go regularly to a remote weekend place of natural beauty and spend time walking with your daughter.

Invite her friends over.

I agree with @Zanatdy .

I've got amazing teenagers who are respectful and doing great so I must have done something right so far.
I didn't advocate doing absolutely nothing but I do feel removing her phone for days as a knee jerk reaction was disproportionate.

A few days without social media will do the kid good. It’s really sad isn’t it that we have a generation of kids who can’t survive a few days without their phone, and a generation of parents too scared to parent. It’s only equivalent of our parents grounding us for a week. Yes, you were cut off from your friends for the week, you might have missed a party, or something exciting. That’s the whole point of grounding so that you think twice next time. Taking the phone is also relevant to ‘the crime’. A random punishment for lying and being rude to your mum isn’t relevant. If her DD can’t manage an hour without her phone to take a bath then it will do her good to de-tox for a few days.

I really hope the government implements this social media ban for under 16’s as it’s clear there are so many parents afraid to take their child’s phone and believe some kind of damage is going to occur if they are without it for a few days. Children are being let down by their parents and the impacts of the phone obsessed generation will be apparent in the future, we are already seeing it.

So she lost her phone from now to the weekend because she took it into the bath with her and said she hadn't? To me that seems like too harsh a punishment. I'm all for using consequences etc but they should be proportionate otherwise she feels resentful.