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Original poster

To introduce a tablet to Autistic 5 YO?

62 replies

13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 22:06

It sort of pains me that I am considering this, but my child has PDA & ASD, simply put, we cannot do activities in the house, due to low frustration tolerance & violence.

He enjoys puzzles, but we cannot do these anymore, they get snapped, and thrown and all sorts.

hes very behind at school, and due to his extreme need for autonomy, essentially wont listen or retain if told directly.

i have a samsung tablet (for uni) he has used it maybe twice? He is not bothered and does not ask for it etc, but i am often alone, with 2 kids the same age, and it’s extremely hard my other child safe.

this could help his PDA, as although i am ultimately in control on what goes on there (no youtube) he gets to select (autonomy)

it may help him to regulate? Tv helps him massively to calm down, distraction and regulation / im in the midst of excessive research and psychological input about how to deal and reframe my parenting, and I need him regulated to even start to bloody consider tactics due to safety

OP posts:
Original poster
13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 23:04

OldCrohn · 02/06/2026 22:58

I think you just need to own you want to give him a tablet to make occupying him easier. These threads are never helpful because unless there's total validation then people feel others are getting at them because they have differences in opinion on this sort of thing and so don't allow tablets for their kids with similar needs.

No i genuinely am looking for opinions, its hard given our situation of course, i want to know really if as parents, you feel the input from TV is better than the input provided from a tablet

OP posts:
Original poster
13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 23:02

FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 23:00

But he can't be on the tablet all day.

What happens at school?

Show quote history

No of course

he hates school, but goes to after school club everyday they give him a snack, which he can choose, and it keeps him out the home for longer, its free play and he has one friend (only friend) there, so it works well for us.

weekends, we leave house at 6am and get McDonalds coffee and drive for around 1-2 hours to be out the house and try to regulate him as he wakes up very angry

OP posts:
Original poster
13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 23:00

FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 22:58

Can he redirect his violence?

My nephew had some anger issues at one point, a Nd whilst I know it's not the same, my sister actually had a lunch bag outside he could go crazy on.

What kind of things is he doing/learning to help him regulate? What support have you got from school/SENCO etc?

Show quote history

He cannot sadly as its so impulse driven, but it is also very targeted at the same time, we have tried this previously but sadly he will only be violent to things that he knows will hurt the most, always another person or an animal.

OP posts:
FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 23:00

13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 22:57

We use the TV to help regulate him, but of course this is not always educational or really using the brain, which a tablet can provide more of?

my son is severely autistic & is in constant dysregulation state, he has no speech development issues, he wants to control everything, it causes harm & we essentially cannot be inside the house if he is not regulated, is that unsafe

Show quote history

But he can't be on the tablet all day.

What happens at school?

FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 22:58

13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 22:54

I understand what you’re saying, ive never wanted previously to get them a tablet etc.

however, my child gets his dopamine hit through being violent, so this alternative seems better given that I need to safeguard my other child.

for example, i cant as much make a drink for myself, or turn around without a dangerous situation happening

Show quote history

Can he redirect his violence?

My nephew had some anger issues at one point, a Nd whilst I know it's not the same, my sister actually had a lunch bag outside he could go crazy on.

What kind of things is he doing/learning to help him regulate? What support have you got from school/SENCO etc?

OldCrohn · 02/06/2026 22:58

I think you just need to own you want to give him a tablet to make occupying him easier. These threads are never helpful because unless there's total validation then people feel others are getting at them because they have differences in opinion on this sort of thing and so don't allow tablets for their kids with similar needs.

Original poster
13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 22:57

delightful1 · 02/06/2026 22:53

I would avoid for as long as possible to be honest. what methods do you use for regulation?

We use the TV to help regulate him, but of course this is not always educational or really using the brain, which a tablet can provide more of?

my son is severely autistic & is in constant dysregulation state, he has no speech development issues, he wants to control everything, it causes harm & we essentially cannot be inside the house if he is not regulated, is that unsafe

OP posts:
Minesamartini · 02/06/2026 22:55

It will not help him regulate. I have taught children with ASD for the last 20 years and this is a fallacy that many parents seem to have bought into. Tablets appear to support regulation because the child seems calm, but they aren't regulating, their brains are just getting the instant gratification that comes from these devices. It ends up doing the opposite of supporting true regulation and your child's emotional regulation will get worse and you will rely on the tablet more and more, at least that is my experience.

I can understand that sometimes parents themselves need the pressure off and have moments where they maybe need to give their child something like a tablet so that they themselves can get time to regulate themselves, but I think it's important to view it from this perspective and see it as something to give you breathing space when you need it to support your own emotional regulation in stressful moments, rather than a tool to support your child's emotional regulation because it won't support theirs.

Original poster
13MAPARTHELL · 02/06/2026 22:54

FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 22:52

I always wonder where people get the idea that autistic kids regulate in tablets. No genuinely.

Every single child will sit passively and zombie like and mute at a tablet.and the more they use the more 'addicted' they become, which can look like a meltdown and they're until they:re given their dopamine fix tablet back and ohhh it's all calm and quiet again etc.

It's just interesting to know if research has been done properly or not.

I understand what you’re saying, ive never wanted previously to get them a tablet etc.

however, my child gets his dopamine hit through being violent, so this alternative seems better given that I need to safeguard my other child.

for example, i cant as much make a drink for myself, or turn around without a dangerous situation happening

OP posts:
delightful1 · 02/06/2026 22:53

I would avoid for as long as possible to be honest. what methods do you use for regulation?

FlowerSticker · 02/06/2026 22:52

I always wonder where people get the idea that autistic kids regulate in tablets. No genuinely.

Every single child will sit passively and zombie like and mute at a tablet.and the more they use the more 'addicted' they become, which can look like a meltdown and they're until they:re given their dopamine fix tablet back and ohhh it's all calm and quiet again etc.

It's just interesting to know if research has been done properly or not.

mrsbowes · 02/06/2026 22:47

I'd avoid introducing tablets, it might pacify him but it's almost impossible to get the genie back in the bottle if they become reliant on them.

If the TV is working as distraction/calming can you just stick with that? You will have much more control over them watching proper shows etc.

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