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Original poster

I feel proud of not drinking for a night - does that mean I’m an alcoholic

233 replies

cbr333 · 02/06/2026 13:03

I have posted here before about trying to reduce my alcohol intake. I have it all together on the face of it but have decided to try and do dry June as I have been drinking one or two glasses of wine every night and more at the weekends. Doesn’t impact my day-to-day but I definitely don't feel fresh in the mornings.

I managed last night and feel confident I can do the same tonight, but the sense of achievement I’m feeling about a single day off wine is a bad sign isn’t it.

I feel like I’ve sleep-walked into a problem and because it’s lovely cote de Provence rose and I’m drinking it alongside perello olives and Torres crisps that it’s somehow not an addiction but just a mum of youngish children having some sort of reward.

I feel a bit ashamed to be honest.

OP posts:
Original poster
cbr333 · 07/06/2026 22:39

@OneThreadOnlybyN@Ayarreetthank you very much for your kindness, it’s really appreciated x

OP posts:
olympicsrock · 07/06/2026 22:35

Well done OP! May I join you in solidarity? I have also just gone a week alcohol free having got into a similar habit for the last few months. I’ve been putting on weight as the booze has increased and snacking / crap food choices and poor sleep has increased .

I’ve got a few weeks of sick leave to reset and hadn’t made any firm plans but perhaps a June off booze is the right thing to do. Thanks for the inspiration xx PS ignore those preachy posters upthread. Some people
are killjoys . It’s about achieving moderation x

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:24

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:21

Me, I don't care if it's a good wine, a good whiskey or the cheapest plonk.

her problem was never alcohol addiction it was simply an unwanted & unhealthy habit

.

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Totally agree.

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:21

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:15

Fair enough, so no, you would react differently.

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Me, I don't care if it's a good wine, a good whiskey or the cheapest plonk.

her problem was never alcohol addiction it was simply an unwanted & unhealthy habit

.

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:17

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:10

Your point is to stick the boot in and lecture.

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Definitely.

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:15

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:06

Because it's wild the level of 'ah it's not so bad sure it's just a few glasses of wine', I can't imagine anyone reacting like this in real life. I genuinely don't know anyone who drinks to that level let alone while in charge fo young children.

Then comes along going 'am I maybe an alcoholic...' then is delighted to accept all the strange minimizing going on here.

It's not just about driving, it's about waking when they need you which is harder under the influence or even realizing there IS an emergency

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She cold turkey has done 7 days & isn't struggling with no alcohol.

she realised she was drinking too frequently/too much to be comfortable with it, so she's changed it.

your unpleasant preaching isn't helping anyone.

we can all read the posts, you were talking about driving.

but it's not relevant anyway. She's not drinking like that now.

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:15

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:12

I'm not interested in your conversation.

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Fair enough, so no, you would react differently.

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:12

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:11

Why so everyone else not more shocked? Genuinely. Would you react the same if she wa having 40 units of white lightening per week?

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I'm not interested in your conversation.

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:12

cbr333 · 07/06/2026 22:08

No a good week would be much less than that. I did say upto half a bottle, I am not measuring it out with a pub measure! I have been totally honest on this thread (and have stated what I drink upto the max rather than editing it). J haven’t wanted people to sugar-coat things however I think you are being quite unkind.

I am just trying to make a positive change and you’re not saying anything I haven’t already thought and punished myself over.

She is being unkind, OP. You're doing great, had a lovely day with the bairns and a fresh, clear head for the new week. Keep on keeping on!

Original poster
cbr333 · 07/06/2026 22:11

I don’t think I have minimised and I certainly haven’t delighted in anything. There have been some strong points and criticism but they have been thoughtfully written and have been helpful in keeping going.

OP posts:
Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:11

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:10

Your point is to stick the boot in and lecture.

Show quote history

Why so everyone else not more shocked? Genuinely. Would you react the same if she wa having 40 units of white lightening per week?

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:10

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:08

Why are we minimizing it is my point?

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Your point is to stick the boot in and lecture.

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:09

cbr333 · 07/06/2026 22:08

No a good week would be much less than that. I did say upto half a bottle, I am not measuring it out with a pub measure! I have been totally honest on this thread (and have stated what I drink upto the max rather than editing it). J haven’t wanted people to sugar-coat things however I think you are being quite unkind.

I am just trying to make a positive change and you’re not saying anything I haven’t already thought and punished myself over.

The positive change is great, just recognize how big a problem it was and don't go back is my point. Minimizing is so dangerous

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:08

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:05

You can guestimate! Well done! What's your point?

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Why are we minimizing it is my point?

Original poster
cbr333 · 07/06/2026 22:08

No a good week would be much less than that. I did say upto half a bottle, I am not measuring it out with a pub measure! I have been totally honest on this thread (and have stated what I drink upto the max rather than editing it). J haven’t wanted people to sugar-coat things however I think you are being quite unkind.

I am just trying to make a positive change and you’re not saying anything I haven’t already thought and punished myself over.

OP posts:
Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:06

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:03

The same as people who don't drive I imagine.

You're being very judgemental & unplesant. Why?

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Because it's wild the level of 'ah it's not so bad sure it's just a few glasses of wine', I can't imagine anyone reacting like this in real life. I genuinely don't know anyone who drinks to that level let alone while in charge fo young children.

Then comes along going 'am I maybe an alcoholic...' then is delighted to accept all the strange minimizing going on here.

It's not just about driving, it's about waking when they need you which is harder under the influence or even realizing there IS an emergency

Ayarreet · 07/06/2026 22:05

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:03

4 bottles a week would be 40 units, if you drink half a bottle every night that's 2.5 bottles. Not 1-2.

Then a bottle a night at the weekend on average is 2 bottles. So 4-5 bottles on an average week.

40-50 units and not as a 1 off but on a 'good' week'

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You can guestimate! Well done! What's your point?

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:03

cbr333 · 07/06/2026 21:56

@Velumentaltoday is my seventh day of no alcohol.

I would say an average week would be 4 bottles of wine - 2 bottles total Monday - Friday then 1-2 bottles at the weekend depending on plans, but sometimes maybe once a month?) it would be 2-3 bottles at the weekend. Still by no means ideal but not 60 units!

4 bottles a week would be 40 units, if you drink half a bottle every night that's 2.5 bottles. Not 1-2.

Then a bottle a night at the weekend on average is 2 bottles. So 4-5 bottles on an average week.

40-50 units and not as a 1 off but on a 'good' week'

OneThreadOnlybyN · 07/06/2026 22:03

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:01

So on weeknights, when your husband works away, and you drink half a bottle of wine. What do you do then in an emergency?

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The same as people who don't drive I imagine.

You're being very judgemental & unplesant. Why?

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:01

cbr333 · 07/06/2026 21:59

I am married, no I have not done that when I have been in charge of the children by myself but I have for sure drank too much to be able to drive them myself (I don’t actually drive if I have even one drink)

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So on weeknights, when your husband works away, and you drink half a bottle of wine. What do you do then in an emergency?

Velumental · 07/06/2026 22:00

cbr333 · 07/06/2026 21:56

@Velumentaltoday is my seventh day of no alcohol.

I would say an average week would be 4 bottles of wine - 2 bottles total Monday - Friday then 1-2 bottles at the weekend depending on plans, but sometimes maybe once a month?) it would be 2-3 bottles at the weekend. Still by no means ideal but not 60 units!

So 5 bottles of wine a week. That's crazy and drunk while solely in charge of young children.

If you were drinking vodka or white lightning instead of wine and admitted you'd so much white lightening you wouldn't be able to get your kid to hospital in emergency the women on here would be suggesting someone call ss

Original poster
cbr333 · 07/06/2026 21:59

Velumental · 07/06/2026 21:52

So you're drinking say 3 bottles of wine at the weekend and 2-3 bottles during the week, so 6 bottles of wine per week?
That's 50-60 units per week

Which is around 4 times the suggested maximum units is it not?

You've gone 1 day? You've no idea if you're physically dependant, give it 2-3 days and see if any physical symptoms develop.

However even looking for this validation is suggestive of alcoholism

Show quote history

I am married, no I have not done that when I have been in charge of the children by myself but I have for sure drank too much to be able to drive them myself (I don’t actually drive if I have even one drink)

OP posts:
Original poster
cbr333 · 07/06/2026 21:56

@Velumentaltoday is my seventh day of no alcohol.

I would say an average week would be 4 bottles of wine - 2 bottles total Monday - Friday then 1-2 bottles at the weekend depending on plans, but sometimes maybe once a month?) it would be 2-3 bottles at the weekend. Still by no means ideal but not 60 units!

OP posts:
Velumental · 07/06/2026 21:56

cbr333 · 03/06/2026 23:23

Were you a wine drinker? I’m ashamed of how drunk I’ve been on occasion whilst the children are running around playing. It’s all wrapped up in ‘look how happy the kids are playing together, making memories’, but if something went wrong and we’d had to take
them to hospital, well I can’t even think about it.

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I can't even imagine this, you are the only adult in charge of your young children in this scenario and you're too drunk to reliably get them to hospital in an emergency?

Velumental · 07/06/2026 21:52

cbr333 · 03/06/2026 23:21

I’ve been thinking about this - and you’re absolutely right. I think the line is that I’m not physically dependant on alcohol but I have a habit (addiction?) that is exacerbated by certain times / feelings.

I don’t crave a glass of wine with lunch on a week day but give me a lunch date with a friend and it’s all I can think about. I can drink half a bottle and not a whole bottle during the week but I struggle to stop at the weekends if I’m socialising.

Show quote history

So you're drinking say 3 bottles of wine at the weekend and 2-3 bottles during the week, so 6 bottles of wine per week?
That's 50-60 units per week

Which is around 4 times the suggested maximum units is it not?

You've gone 1 day? You've no idea if you're physically dependant, give it 2-3 days and see if any physical symptoms develop.

However even looking for this validation is suggestive of alcoholism

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