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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wear a white print dress to my brother’s wedding & dressing my DD in white too?

487 replies

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 07:23

I plan to wear a white dress with a nature print on it for my brother’s wedding in August. Picked it out with DM, she thinks it’s definitely fine. The thing is my toddler DD will also be wearing a white. Do you think anyone would take offence? I’ve added a picture of a similar dress on this thread because I don’t want the actual one on here if I wear it.

Wondering what you think?

AIBU to wear a white print dress to my brother’s wedding & dressing my DD in white too?
OP posts:
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Original poster
brillfrill · 02/06/2026 12:33

@bigboykitty
What a stupid question!! What’s the point of commenting if you’re just going to be rude?!?!

OP posts:
bigboykitty · 02/06/2026 12:26

Are you unhappy that your brother's getting married @brillfrill ?

BestZebbie · 02/06/2026 12:26

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 07:23

I plan to wear a white dress with a nature print on it for my brother’s wedding in August. Picked it out with DM, she thinks it’s definitely fine. The thing is my toddler DD will also be wearing a white. Do you think anyone would take offence? I’ve added a picture of a similar dress on this thread because I don’t want the actual one on here if I wear it.

Wondering what you think?

I'd buy a bright orange shrug to wear over that dress during the service, and an orange hair accessory - that would cement that you are wearing orange rather than white to most people and then you can take the shrug off later if you get hot. As this is only an example dress, obviously you'd need to change "orange" to whatever your actual dress uses.
I don't think a sleeveless dress is formal enough for a 'formal' wedding service, however, that is quite a smart everyday dress rather than a formal one - and if it is in a church then generally you'd want your shoulders covered for the service anyway.

thinkingaboutipswich · 02/06/2026 12:23

Ohgoose · 02/06/2026 09:30

It’s definitely not suitable for a formal wear dress code, it’s very casual and not that nice. Sorry.

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I agree with this and all the other posters saying it’s not a particularly nice dress. I’d be dressing up a bit more for my brother’s wedding. The ones someone linked upthread are much nicer for a wedding.

albhub · 02/06/2026 12:17

I think your dress is ok but perhaps a little informal if they've asked for "formal wedding clothes".
None of the dresses you have shown are suitable for your daughter because they look bridesmaidy/flower girl.
You should choose a dress for her to match the colour of a colour accent in your dress.

genesis92 · 02/06/2026 12:12

Personally I would not risk wear anything white to a wedding. You don’t know how the bride would feel. There’s plenty of other colours to choose from

Original poster
brillfrill · 02/06/2026 12:05

Woodfiresareamazing2 · 02/06/2026 12:00

I really don't mean this in a rude way, but have you been to many weddings?

These dresses all look 'bridesmaidy' because of the fabric, style and colours.

It WILL look like she's a bridesmaid wannabe.

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Not since DD was born and tbh I never paid much attention to what children wore back then

OP posts:
Woodfiresareamazing2 · 02/06/2026 12:00

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 10:14

What is it about them that makes them look bridesmaidy?

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I really don't mean this in a rude way, but have you been to many weddings?

These dresses all look 'bridesmaidy' because of the fabric, style and colours.

It WILL look like she's a bridesmaid wannabe.

Seagoats · 02/06/2026 11:59

Absolutely fine. And very lovely

xOlive · 02/06/2026 11:55

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 09:02

Just turned 4

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Does she like blue?
This is from Next.

AIBU to wear a white print dress to my brother’s wedding & dressing my DD in white too?
DeftGoldHedgehog · 02/06/2026 11:45

What is it with women on MN and their compulsion to wear white or near white to other people's weddings?

What is it with wedding guests making perfectly normal style choices for summer weddings?

As long as people aren't trying to look like a bridesmaid or a bride, cause confusion or outshine the bride it isn't a problem. End of story.

Calliopespa · 02/06/2026 11:41

Seagulldancing · 02/06/2026 11:40

My sister threw a strop that I suggested DD, who was a flower girl at her wedding, wore a white dress with a sash. Only she was allowed to wear white. And that included white backgrounds on flowery dresses.
Only you know if the Bride is likely to be crazy.

Edited

That really is madness! Flower girls are most often white I would say.

Seagulldancing · 02/06/2026 11:40

My sister threw a strop that I suggested DD, who was a flower girl at her wedding, wore a white dress with a sash. Only she was allowed to wear white. And that included white backgrounds on flowery dresses.
Only you know if the Bride is likely to be crazy.

Calliopespa · 02/06/2026 11:37

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/06/2026 11:32

I think it’s a lovely dress and definitely formal enough and coloured enough. The which dress for dd is a maddening issue mostly brought up by people trying to create drama where there isn’t. Most little girls party dresses also could be flower girl dresses because that’s what little girls wear to parties. Get her what she wants and ignore the idiots.

Yes, I think there is truth in this.

I looked again at the ones you posted op, and I think the little white one with flowers could look ok if you both like that. Yes, it is white, but such a very strong pattern would be unusual for a flower girl dress.

ETA some of the posted suggestions are more what I would put a little girl in to go to nursery, and I think it is perfectly acceptable for her to have a special dress. I'd still avoid all white and long and puffy.

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/06/2026 11:32

I think it’s a lovely dress and definitely formal enough and coloured enough. The which dress for dd is a maddening issue mostly brought up by people trying to create drama where there isn’t. Most little girls party dresses also could be flower girl dresses because that’s what little girls wear to parties. Get her what she wants and ignore the idiots.

PurpleThistle7 · 02/06/2026 11:26

Just saw she doesn't like pink - I think I was thinking of my own daughter at 4

Could do something plain coloured too -

https://www.next.co.uk/style/su812239/w64284

next.co.uk/style/su851924/y07334#y07334

https://www.next.co.uk/style/su948936/g16407

https://www.next.co.uk/style/sv072946/y55065

BCSurvivor · 02/06/2026 11:25

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 10:53

No, this is the type of dress DD said she wanted, a shiny one

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But this a wedding, OP, not a Disney Princess dressup party.

Confuserr · 02/06/2026 11:25

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 11:20

It was a friend of mine who questioned it tbh, she send this emoji as a reaction: 😶

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She was right to. It's both too white and too informal. Can you return it?

Calliopespa · 02/06/2026 11:24

SnoringLabradors · 02/06/2026 11:23

The ones your previously posted are bridesmaid type dresses how about this
www.joules.com/style/su823688/w94980

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Isn't that just an every day play dress?

ETA deleted suggestion! Was clearly not shiny when i posted the big pic!

DappledThings · 02/06/2026 11:24

badfinger · 02/06/2026 11:21

But they almost always argue back and defend the percentage of white - "it's just a white background!", "there are sprigs of flowers!", "it's not the least bit bridal, just floorlength..." "I've never heard of this no white rule before," on and on.

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All of which are perfectly sensible viewpoints.

BCSurvivor · 02/06/2026 11:23

crochetandshit · 02/06/2026 10:50

Are you upset your dd isn't a flower girl/bridesmaid? You seem absolutely determined to dress her as one regardless of posters linking lovely dresses.

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I agree with this.
Despite all the advice and links to more suitable, less formal dresses, you still only seem to be considering satin, structured, pooffy bridesmaid type dresses, as close to white as possible.

SnoringLabradors · 02/06/2026 11:23

brillfrill · 02/06/2026 10:53

No, this is the type of dress DD said she wanted, a shiny one

Show quote history

The ones your previously posted are bridesmaid type dresses how about this
www.joules.com/style/su823688/w94980

badfinger · 02/06/2026 11:21

Confuserr · 02/06/2026 11:13

Tbf I think it's selection bias. People post because they (or someone else) has had second thoughts about their outfit. I wouldn't post a wedding outfit on here for approval because I would simply choose a suitable one in the first place.

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But they almost always argue back and defend the percentage of white - "it's just a white background!", "there are sprigs of flowers!", "it's not the least bit bridal, just floorlength..." "I've never heard of this no white rule before," on and on.

Original poster
brillfrill · 02/06/2026 11:20

Confuserr · 02/06/2026 11:13

Tbf I think it's selection bias. People post because they (or someone else) has had second thoughts about their outfit. I wouldn't post a wedding outfit on here for approval because I would simply choose a suitable one in the first place.

Show quote history

It was a friend of mine who questioned it tbh, she send this emoji as a reaction: 😶

OP posts:
greenmacchiato · 02/06/2026 11:20

It's not even "that" white to become a problem, absolutely wear it!