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AIBU?

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Original poster

Did I overreact?

34 replies

Ethellee · 01/06/2026 12:28

Last weekend was 100th birthday party for my great-aunt and I was supposed to be going with DP, DS5, DSD13, and DSs10 and 11.

On the ninety minute drive, SDC were whining, shouting and fighting so much I had to stop the car and tell them off twice. DP was occasionally shouting at them but also listening to a podcast. On the third occasion I stopped the car (because blood had been drawn), I turned around and drove them all home.

DS and I had a really good time. We got home last night and DP is accusing me of overreacting.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/06/2026 12:42

GreenCandleWax · 01/06/2026 12:40

I bet the great aunt was though, and whoever organised the party and then had four no-shows! (if I have understood the confusing post). Pandering to bad behaviour does the DC no good, or anyone else affected.

Show quote history

Stopping them from coming isn’t pandering to them. And someone celebrating a 100th birthday won’t be arsed that her great nieces step kids didn’t come after endangering everyone’s lives on the way there.

ThejoyofNC · 01/06/2026 12:40

Get these kids away from your own before he picks up their behaviour. Of course you made the right decision.

GreenCandleWax · 01/06/2026 12:40

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/06/2026 12:30

YANBU, and I bet the step kids weren’t even bothered

I bet the great aunt was though, and whoever organised the party and then had four no-shows! (if I have understood the confusing post). Pandering to bad behaviour does the DC no good, or anyone else affected.

Original poster
Ethellee · 01/06/2026 12:40

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/06/2026 12:30

YANBU, and I bet the step kids weren’t even bothered

I had suggested they stay home but they wanted to come and so did DP.

Their behaviour is really horrible at the moment and I was anxious about them showing me up at the party, so was relieved to drop them home instead.

OP posts:
Maray1967 · 01/06/2026 12:39

One of my line managers years ago told me she stopped the car and made her three teens get out and walk the two miles home when they were fighting each other. She said they were stunned that she drove off and left them and contrite when they got back home. It was in broad daylight, good weather and they knew where they were, but she said her sister was horrified.

She told me that they never kicked off in the car again and she thought it was one of her best parenting decisions.

OP, tell DH that if he expects his DC to attend family gatherings in future they need to behave.

Turnitoffnonagain · 01/06/2026 12:35

You 100% did the right thing.

Loulou4022 · 01/06/2026 12:33

WhatAMarvelousTune · 01/06/2026 12:31

YANBU.

And as an aside, surely whoever is not driving is the one who needs to be dealing with any issues with children, not listening to a podcast and ignoring it all!

Absolutely! How unsafe leaving the driver to deal with the fallout!!

WhatAMarvelousTune · 01/06/2026 12:31

YANBU.

And as an aside, surely whoever is not driving is the one who needs to be dealing with any issues with children, not listening to a podcast and ignoring it all!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/06/2026 12:30

YANBU, and I bet the step kids weren’t even bothered