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AIBU?

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AIBU to think my SIL was rude about my clothes?

294 replies

UninterestedInFashion · 31/05/2026 17:12

Over the half term week we saw dh family a few times. A kids birthday party, family bbq and couple of outings to the park and pub.

I admit I’m not very fashionable , don’t really follow it and wear what I like and what suits me. For context this is what I wore each time Kids party : black 3/4 length leggings and striped vest top and converse
family bbq hibiscus pattern dress and sandals
park denim shorts and a vest top and sandals
pub same hibiscus dress (it’s very old I’ve had it years but I love it)

The first time SIL said ‘oh here’s Y2K girl’ and laughed at the dress. The second time I wore it she quietly said to me ‘a spotty dress would suit you better - polka dots are in right now’

When I wore the denim shorts she said ‘you’re brave ! They are very short ! How many years have you had those!’

When I wore the 3/4 leggings she again took me aside and said ‘let’s go shopping one day - you need some wide leg linen trousers not these leggings ! I’m surprised they even still sell them or are they vintage again ‘ and laughed?

I said to her no thanks I’m comfortable and it’s hot so I’m wearing what I like and what keeps me cool. She said ‘come on sometimes we all need a bit of a refresh!’

AIBU to think she was really rude ??? I didn’t feel hurt but just irritated.

OP posts:
SlightlyAjar · 01/06/2026 00:13

justasmalltownmum · 31/05/2026 23:19

I think she actually means well as she offered to help find you new pieces rather then just slagging you off.

Means well? She just sounds monumentally thick. The OP wasn’t asking for fashion advice, or expressing any unhappiness with her clothes. There was no call for her intervention.

canuckup · 01/06/2026 00:08

Janecat23 · 31/05/2026 19:32

She means well. I’d just say honestly you do t care a jot about fashion and feel v comfortable the way you are. Thanks for offering but just not me.

Means well?!?!

justasmalltownmum · 31/05/2026 23:19

I think she actually means well as she offered to help find you new pieces rather then just slagging you off.

Hallywally · 31/05/2026 23:19

Very arrogant and judgmental. Tell her to bog off.

DontTeaseMyDog · 31/05/2026 23:09

SlightlyAjar · 31/05/2026 22:50

On what grounds? Her hibiscus dress?

Nope, probably the constant comments really isn't it?

SlightlyAjar · 31/05/2026 22:50

WearyAuldWumman · 31/05/2026 18:49

Well, the SIL is certainly jealous of the OP.

On what grounds? Her hibiscus dress?

PeachySmile2 · 31/05/2026 22:45

Yes that was very rude of her. It sounds like she does want to help you but went the wrong way about it. Only thing I’ll say is 3/4 leggings should be burned unless you’re using them for exercise.

YourPoliteTurtle · 31/05/2026 22:36

Depends on your relationship.

If she sees you as a little sister, and is like that with her siblings, she means well. Maybe awkwardly, but meant well.

If you are more like a very distant relation, a vague friend, yes, rude.

Does she have a point about the shorts being VERY shorts? Because if you can see the pockets coming out, it's not a great look on someone old enough to be a mother.

MsDitsy · 31/05/2026 22:22

Just say thanks for the fashion advice, you appreciate her concern but it wouldn't work for you as you don't like her taste in clothes. Flamin' cheek of her.

Pistachiocake · 31/05/2026 22:18

Just laugh at her-and point out that Y2K clothes are very in-the young women in my family try to buy them online.

BunnyLake · 31/05/2026 22:09

BashfulClam · 31/05/2026 20:24

I’d just say ‘YOU want to take ME clothes shopping??’ Then look her up and down and say ‘riiiiigggghhhhht…’

Or ask her if she’s paying for the new wardrobe of clothes.

MeatyMagda · 31/05/2026 22:08

Notsosweetcaroline · 31/05/2026 18:12

They really aren’t,,peddle pushers are.

Ok, tell that to all the early 20’s glamorous women who are wearing them in every Pilates, yoga and barre class I go to!

NewbieSM · 31/05/2026 21:39

Op she sounds like a bitch and she is trying to neg you. Ok so maybe you aren’t winning any style awards but who cares? You didn’t ask for her opinion so she should keep it to herself.

UninterestedInFashion · 31/05/2026 21:38

Besidemyselfwithworry · 31/05/2026 21:17

This

what was she wearing making her think she had the right to speak to you like this?

just ignore her she sounds awful, wear what you want!

She always looks nice and recently wears a lot of matching sets in pastel colours or beige. One of the occasions she had a pair of black and white spotted trousers (quite big spots) and a lovely white fitted cami top and it looked nice on her but I do think if I dressed similarly if that’s what fashionable that I’d feel uncomfortable and also I don’t really wear pale colours as they wash me out and I also spill things or the kids do 😂😂

OP posts:
heartsinvisiblefury · 31/05/2026 21:30

Wdutua · 31/05/2026 18:57

She is being OTT and trying to do you a favour (maybe). If you wear something that is very outdated then it makes you look older than you are. What about trying to wear a little something that is newer and even more comfortable, maybe a top, earrings, along with what you have. If your hairstyle is more than 5 years old, and you go to a hairdresser, say you want something slightly different. You can mostly tell lady's age or how long they have been married by their hairstyle, which hasn't changed at all. It's really not about drastic change but more subtle little things.

She would probably not notice that she had bitchy and you would not be so sensitive to her remarks. A win on your side.

The 1950’s have just returned your call…surprised you haven’t suggested the OP put some lipstick on and a ribbon in her hair.

IlovePostitnotes · 31/05/2026 21:26

How rude of her. Ignore her and wear what you want/like. I bet you look lovely. X

heartsinvisiblefury · 31/05/2026 21:23

I’d tell her that you have never liked her style and wouldn’t go to her for fashion advice even if you wanted it so maybe to think about herself rather than other people.

Besidemyselfwithworry · 31/05/2026 21:17

Cosyblankets · 31/05/2026 17:15

Extremely rude

This

what was she wearing making her think she had the right to speak to you like this?

just ignore her she sounds awful, wear what you want!

Pinkyponkyp · 31/05/2026 21:15

I wouldn’t say anything to her, but I’d defo be having some fun with outfits when I knew she’d be there 🤣

Silver sparkly boob tube and tiny shorts one day, full on granny outfit with tights the next… just to see her face 🤣🤣

QueenietheGreat · 31/05/2026 20:56

@UninterestedInFashion
And are we all to assume that she'd give both Vogue magazine and the Hollywood Red carpet a good run for their money?
Cheeky spiteful cow

childoftkty · 31/05/2026 20:54

Your clothes do sound dated but if you’re happy with them and don’t care that is fine. My sister dresses similarly and I don’t think she looks particularly good but I don’t say anything as it’s none of my business. As I tell my children “what is in your head doesn’t always need to come out of your mouth”

Mumtobabyhavoc · 31/05/2026 20:38

"While we're on the topic, you really shouldn't wear X, it's not flattering on you."

"Everyone, SiL thinks my clothes are shit. Does everyone agree or is she rude?"

"Look, SiL, and I mean this kindly, Fuck. Right Off."

Auburndi · 31/05/2026 20:35

She’s a cow. "Tell you what, Jemima, let’s make a deal: you won’t comment on my clothes and I won’t comment on yours. If I want your input I’ll let you know."

TooOrangey · 31/05/2026 20:33

How rude of her. My sister in law is not remotely interested in fashion. I’d not dream of making any sort of comment to her about her clothes.

Rhaidimiddim · 31/05/2026 20:30

Wdutua · 31/05/2026 20:17

Are expletives necessary?

I'd say yes.

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