To think parents are not teaching any independence?

This is outrageous poor SS

I guess the thing was, you didn't get that info. Going back to when I was a teen, you eventually worked out that the bus wasn't coming and walked, or went back to the school who could then find out the information and you could make a plan from there (too far for me to walk home from school). That did happen a few times.

A ‘concerned citizen’ posted in our village chat group a while ago. A boy had knocked on his door asking if he wanted his lawn mowing or any other odd jobs. The poster was concerned - ‘why is he looking for work at his age? Are his parents not feeding him? Aren’t they worried he could be knocking on the door of paedophiles?’

The lad’s dad responded, turns out the boy was 14 and trying to earn money to buy himself something he wanted, and they suggested he earn it by… well, doing some work. Like any kid would’ve 30 years ago.

Gosh I had forgotten that! Our junior school had a little bed you would be tucked up in if you were sick until they could get hold of a parent to take you home.

How would she have received the information about the bus service? That was the important bit, having a hard copy of her school bus pass would have made no difference.

I remember phone boxes mostly in city centres, near shops, at railway stations etc. I don't recall too many of them in the suburban streets you'd walk home from school on. I never used (or considered using) one to call my parents and I didn't have a mobile till I was in sixth form!

Phones are useful on public transport granted, but we are talking here about the bus you get every day, not some trip to the other end of the country. And things like electronic departure boards at bus stops are much more common. Phones often aren't that helpful for real-time bus times in my experience anyway.

Sooner or later you have to learn that if a journey goes wrong or you get attacked you can't just call your mum for help. Perhaps better to learn these lessons in the relatively straightforward environment of your hometown at a young age than have them thrust upon you later in life.

I agree, I had a Nokia 3410 at school - I could text/call but that was it pretty much.

And let’s go back to hard copy bus passes to enable this.

We used to get dropped off at a country lane junction 45 minutes walk from home, left, to wait for the bus. If it didn't turn up, you walked home. There weren't any payphones I can remember.

They can just have dumbphones? That's what my year 7 has. School removes phones for a week if seen and the parent has to come and collect, but more of the year 7s don't have one at all or just a brick. A dumbphone fulfils the same function as a phone box.

There has been a dripping destruction of independence for kids. Overly safety conscious nurseries and schools teach parents by example to be overly cautious too. The physical skills and strength of young children has massively declined. Parents arrange play dates instead of kids just going out in the street and playing with friends freely unsupervised in the local neighbourhood. Or kids spend their time in parent organised activities. Parents expected to monitor what homework their kids have and when and then direct their kids to do it. When I was at school, you just remembered what homework you had and were responsible for that yourself. And I started working whilst studying at 16. Given the high rates of youth unemployment and greater minimum wage for 16 years old ( no such thing as MW when I was a kid, mind) I wonder how many 16 year olds work now.

This loss of independence is rubbish. I would not be even remotely surprised if it contributes to the poor mental health of so many young people. How can kids feel capable when they are brought up in a culture that teaches them they should be given no responsibility or autonomy or ability to sort out their own stuff and solve their own problems?

I think you’re forgetting how far some kids travel for secondary school. They need phones for safety, to see when next bus or train is, to let parents know they’re going somewhere after school and not coming straight home etc. without that it’s all a bit of a nightmare. Schools of course can say no phones switched on or in sight at school but they’re on dodgy ground saying no phones on school journeys. I’d spend my life wondering where my kid was and calling the police instead of looking on 360 or seeing a message from them that they forgot they’ve got football/ revision or are going round a friends house.

Yes all the same for my kids. Bus passes are on their phone, their money too. But just because kids have phones doesn't mean they are less independent. I have a tendency towards over protectiveness but the tracker makes me less likely to overreact if they are a bit late, and I know they and their friends have phones on them if they need, so I'm less likely to pass that onto them. Things like not teaching your kids how to get on the bus or that they are bound by contracts or turning up to Freshers week is just ridiculous though. And it's nothing to do with phones.

We didn't have a house phone until I was 16 so no point having tuppence for a pay phone and I walked to infants and junior schools which were on opposite sides of my street and secondary also in the same village half a mile away.

I’m a lecturer and I’ve noticed it tends to be the parents who are a pain in the arse, completely mollycoddling their adult children like they almost don’t believe they’re adults capable of caring for themselves. They turn up to open days flapping and asking 10000 questions while the actual prospective student is standing there utterly humiliated.

I agree re independence. I’ve always raised my DC to care for themselves. They get dropped off at school but walk home and have since year 6. Not a quick walk either, it was about 2km from primary and almost 4km from secondary. They have made their own packed lunches since like year 4. They wash up their own plates and put them away. They change their own bedding, put their washing on, definitely in charge of tidying their rooms.

Happy for them to go out with friends for the day to different cities. DS did his year 10 work experience last year in a city about 30 miles away so got the train there and back plus navigated through the city alone. They can look after themselves tbh and this is how it should be otherwise uni comes as a real shock.

That is much more convenient but she could have found a solution if her phone was dead, for example. When I go to events I always print a hard copy of tickets. I don't trust phones not to malfunction. They're just machines and one day, it will happen.

DD’s school bus pass is on her phone. Any delays, breakdowns etc. she is notified by text. At least twice it had a 90 minute delay (going in) and once it never came at all. She was able to make alternative arrangements (and not be terribly late) because she had her phone on her.

Yes, this. On my second day of sixth form I accidentally got on the wrong bus home (I had mistakenly assumed it passed close to my house when it didn’t). We lived out in the sticks so getting on the wrong bus meant being ending up miles from home. I wasn’t a bit worried, because I knew I could get off in a certain village that had a phone box by the village green and a pay phone in the Co-op. Nowadays you’re pretty screwed unless you go up and ask a stranger to use their phone, which most people refuse anyway as they’re scared you’re trying to mug them.

My opinion is you are correct OP, parents do not seem to be teaching kids independence these days. Let alone any life skills such as finances or cooking.

However, I do feel the world is far more dangerous than it was 40 years ago. Phones are an essential tool in this day and age and they should be allowed switched off in a bag during the school day.

it is inevitable that one day something serious will happen to a child that could have been prevented if they had a phone and then the school will come under fire and have to change the rules.

some of these schools can’t manage certain matters very well at all. My kids school only has a 30 minute lunch break and it literally is not long enough for some kids to queue up and eat their meal before the bell goes. We had to switch to packed lunches as my kid was getting served at about 26 minutes so was unable to barely start lunch let alone finish. Utter stupidity from the school.

Meet ups and fights may have happened, but they were not on the scale they can and do now. Link ups are literally being spread on Snapchat and typically happen during school holidays.
And filming people and posting embarrassing and mean spirited videos was not a thing. Social media has changed the situation entirely.

That is one thing I am always glad of growing up before phones. At least we could get away from the bullies for part of the day. Now they can follow you home on social media or whatever.

Greatest risks to teenagers in the UK today aside from road traffic accidents:

Mental health problems (anxiety, depression)
Bullying (including cyberbullying)
Excessive social media and smartphone use
Sleep deprivation
Self-harm
Online exploitation/scams

Much greater risk than being punched on a train or abducted while walking home.

The impact of phones is universal in western countries, so it is relevant.

Well then your childhood isn't relevant to 'days gone by' discussions about how life has changed in England.

@suggestionswelcomed I'm not talking about parents, being supportive, I'm talking about wider society. It seems to be rural, where you grew up. But we could even run into a local labour/social club or pub and they'd be someone who knew our family. I did just that when my friend got stuck on bunker/railings, or another friend cut her finger on a damaged slide. Those pubs and clubs have gone. Points of safety have gone.

Another here who thinks phones should be allowed for the journey. As others have said, when i was growing up there were phoneboxes all over the place so we could ring home if need be.

That is probably part of it. More likely to be latch key kids too. No before and after school care for us. If we were sick at school and they couldn't get hold of our parents, we just stayed there. If we were at a friend's place and something wasn't great, we dealt with it and couldn't let our parents know we wanted to go home. Then again, some of the things we did get up to with that independence! :-)