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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To love A&E despite the wait?

136 replies

HotTiredDog · 30/05/2026 22:54

Over 9 hours in a very busy city A&E today with DM, following a fall at home.
They have established that her heart is fine, lots of good blood stuff, X-rays of queries and carried out dressing of wounds.
This was free at the point of need & was carried out by amazing professionals, with the utmost care & thoughtfulness.
Seriously, 9 hours was nothing for all this attention, not really.
The tragedy was on the MH side, with some seriously unwell folk who couldn’t be given the care they so desperately need - I dearly wanted to help but had no way of doing so.
I am so proud of & grateful for the people of A&E. We must keep it safe.

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AreWeHeadingForAnotherLockdown · 03/06/2026 01:24

.

AreWeHeadingForAnotherLockdown · 02/06/2026 12:17

DemonsandMosquitoes · 31/05/2026 06:46

Sadly, it’s the fact there are now so many 91 year olds, often frail, with several complex co morbidities and in very poor health that are in and out of A&E like a revolving door and at the heart of the NHS capacity problems. No excuse for poor ‘care’ though.
Difficult conversations needed. Nurse of 36 years.

Doesnt matter how many '91'years old are in and out

My 91 year old nan was last in 6 years ago and was treated worse than a dog.

The hospitals have no care and compassion.
Its awful.
I notice how the nurses treat the elderly so much worse

elliejjtiny · 01/06/2026 09:28

IME the NHS/A and E are great in genuine life or death emergencies. But the rest of the time not. Staff are generally lovely and many are like aunties and uncles to my dc who are frequent fliers. But there are some who don't recognise that I know my dc better than they do and that a "simple procedure" is not that simple on a medically complex child. Also the system is broken and underfunded. When my then 12 year old attempted suicide they saved his life in a and e and I am truly grateful. But then he was assessed by camhs and there was nothing they could do for him. My pregnancy with my youngest became a mild emergency and there were delays with getting him out. It became a true emergency and we have both been left with lifelong disabilities that have cost way more in the long run than it would have cost to have the staff required to get him out quicker.

Peanutbutterkitty · 01/06/2026 09:14

HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 21:08

FFS. I just said what we experienced.
I am grateful for the care that my DM received, on a very busy, hot, understaffed day - what on earth is wrong with that?
Clearly it’s not the gold standard for emergency healthcare. It would have been easy to complain about then &
now but what’s the point?
Clearly the NhS needs massive improvement, you’d be blind not to see that. It doesn’t have the space, equipment, management structures, clinical & support personnel for the current population levels of this country.
Obviously in some other countries it’s quicker / cleaner / better etc. But it is now what it is now, and can’t be allowed to deteriorate any more than it has done.

Encouraging people to not only tolerate, but even be grateful for the state of the NHS is irresponsible. We should be outraged it has got as bad as this!

Thepeopleversuswork · 01/06/2026 09:10

concertinacornflake · 31/05/2026 08:36

No, YABU and your standards are too low.

Nine hours is far too long to wait. Only 15 years ago it was very rare to wait more than four hours.

The people who staff A&E do not think nine hours is acceptable, because it isn't.

Agree. A&E is horrific.

I’m afraid this post falls under the category of stuff from people who follow the “our wonderful NHS” religion and have been brainwashed.

Thinking a nine hour wait is acceptable is like Stockholm Syndrome.

nomas · 01/06/2026 08:34

My hand got drenched in boiling water tap water (so not actually boiling thankfully, like from the kettle), and I drove myself to A+E in a crying mess. The nurse was great, I was seen very quickly and he sat me down in a ward with the cold water tap on for half an hour and then put cooling burn wraps on my hand.

I didn’t need a doctor though. That’s my only experience of A+E for myself, and I was happy with it.

youalright · 01/06/2026 07:46

DontShoutInMyEarholeTracey · 01/06/2026 06:30

OMG, this is awful! Surely brain bleeds need to be identified and treated quickly?
I would ask them to show you cctv footage of alleged assault. The assault will be documented in your medical notes and this is not fair if it’s not true.

This was years ago now would they have cameras in resus as thats apparently where it happened.

Vinvertebrate · 01/06/2026 07:31

FishersGate · 01/06/2026 05:40

Probably because you are paying for it! Ridiculous comparison

Emergency care free at point of delivery in FR and CH. UAE requires insurance card because all government healthcare is reserved for citizens.

It’s got fuck all to do with “paying” and everything to do with the NHS model being dogshit. Just look at how many other countries have copied our system: zero.

Anarchy99 · 01/06/2026 07:30

HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 22:05

That’s sad, to put it mildly. Surely though, the only person who will suffer is you? And the Health Secretary, NHS management etc won’t have a clue.

Well of course but that’s the chance I might have to take. The extra layers of stress aren’t worth it. I can’t even have an appointment at my GP practice without some fuck up or other from their communication.I’m done with one side not knowing what other one is doing and the resultant stress.

DontShoutInMyEarholeTracey · 01/06/2026 06:45

OneNavyPoster · 31/05/2026 00:26

A&E isn't safe. There are more and more people acting as Doctors on rotas who are not qualified but can even get paid more than the Doctors they're not qualified to replace.

Look up the 'Every Doctor' campaign - "A doctor-led community of NHS patients & staff standing together for:
Excellent care for everyone
A well-supported workforce &
A well-resourced, publicly owned, sustainable NHS"

And this published by the British Medical Association (BMA) just last month -

"Half of hospital trusts employing non-doctors on doctor rotas
by Ben Ireland

We are concerned by the ‘haphazard’ approach to advanced practitioners staffing by NHS management
Published: Saturday 25 April 2026

Almost half of hospital trusts have been asking non-doctors to fill in on medical rotas, according to FoI (Freedom of Information) requests lodged by the BMA.

The association had responses from 85 of 202 trusts in the UK, with 41 (48 per cent) confirming they permit AP (advanced practitioners) to cover doctors’ rota gaps.

APs are healthcare professionals with backgrounds including nursing, paramedic, physiotherapy and pharmacy. While many are experienced in their base profession, working on medical roles is beyond their scope of practice.

The BMA has said using APs to fill doctor rotas is a risk to patient safety and that the FoI data showed a ‘slapdash’ approach by NHS trusts and a postcode lottery for patients.

BMA council chair Tom Dolphin said the findings were evidence of a ‘haphazard’ approach to staffing from NHS management at the trusts in question.

https://www.bma.org.uk/news-and-opinion/half-of-hospital-trusts-employing-non-doctors-on-doctor-rotas

Edited

I guess this is what happens when we got too many people in the country and not enough medical staff and hospitals to deal with it all. The NHS is not fit for purpose!

DontShoutInMyEarholeTracey · 01/06/2026 06:42

AreWeHeadingForAnotherLockdown · 31/05/2026 01:13

My Nan is currently in hospital and is being treated disgustingly, shes 91

While im glad your mother has had good care, not everyone does sadly

True. I have witnessed this first hand too. The elderly are treated appallingly. I despise hospitals and A&E departments.

DontShoutInMyEarholeTracey · 01/06/2026 06:30

youalright · 31/05/2026 07:03

I was made to feel like I was making a fuss and i was a timewaster and it was just anxiety got sent home turned out to be a pulmonary embolism. Another time I apparently assaulted staff in resus (I have no memory of this) then I had a mh assessment that I was apparently fine (again no memory of this) then I was told to leave and that i was lucky they wasn't calling the police at this point im incredibly confused had no idea what had happened and was shocked as im not a violent person. Went home passed out got took back turned out I had a brain bleed. So no I don't like or trust a&e or drs

OMG, this is awful! Surely brain bleeds need to be identified and treated quickly?
I would ask them to show you cctv footage of alleged assault. The assault will be documented in your medical notes and this is not fair if it’s not true.

TheRealWhacker · 01/06/2026 06:29

The NHS is falling apart and needs serious reform/overhauling and yes, that could mean an insurance based system like the Scandi countries.

The problem is to say so is practically treason to the left and you’ll be told you hate the poor/are a bigot etc. etc.

What these people don’t realise is the current state of the NHS is disproportionately negatively affecting poor people - most people in professional jobs now have private healthcare included as standard, which ok it doesn’t cover A&E but does cover a lot of other things like cancer investigations, knee ops etc. Also, there’s evidence that poorer people are often less able to advocate for themselves, which is vital in this system which is falling apart, so overall poorer people are typically receiving worse care.

These people who insist on maintaining the NHS at all costs can’t seem to work out there is a middle ground between this and a US system, as is working in many other countries, where the standard of care can be improved for all. Nobody is in any way suggesting everyone should be paying the same rate for healthcare or that poorer people should be unable to afford it - there are mechanisms to ensure its proportionate to means.

HotTiredDog · 01/06/2026 05:52

Pistachiocake · 31/05/2026 22:29

Are you fairly young and generally healthy? Anyone who isn't doesn't seem to have anything positive to say about our AE.
Old man left to sit in a chair for 2 days (GP said it was urgent for him to go). That wouldn't be nice for a healthy 20 year old to manage. If his family hadn't intervened, how long would he have been left?
Cancer patients left in agony when they had to use AE.
Woman forced to lose her baby in AE corridor. Those lucky enough to have healthy pregnancies get a delivery suite to themselves.

Unfortunately no I am 60 with multiple chronic conditions, a pretty limited life expectancy, and aging parents to care for.
This is why I was grateful that even more sh*t wasn’t added in.

And yes @Anarchy99 I suppose I am prickly; apologies for taking it out on you.

OP posts:
FishersGate · 01/06/2026 05:40

Vinvertebrate · 30/05/2026 23:20

Emergency care is ultimately far more shit in the UK than in any comparable country. (I can personally vouch for France, Switzerland and UAE). Terminally ill DM was put in a cupboard when I complained politely about lack of infection control. She’d been sent there by her oncologist for - ironically - neutropenia, and required hospitalisation.

The NHS version of A&E is probably acceptable if you’ve spent your entire life living in a cave and are unfamiliar with modern healthcare and its efficient delivery. Otherwise, it’s like a fucking field hospital without the war.

Probably because you are paying for it! Ridiculous comparison

Peanutbutterkitty · 01/06/2026 05:37

Receiving the healthcare you need is the bare minimum we should expect. A 9 hour wait is NOT. Neither is the service that a lot of other people have had to deal with - waits even longer that, including for ambulances in life or death situations, months long waits for appointments that again, should not be delayed... It is appalling.

thebabewiththepowder · 01/06/2026 03:11

Having been to A&E far more than my fair share, I have some pretty strong opinions about how terrible it is and now I think I would actually refuse to go unless I was unconscious and someone made that decision for me. My personal experience is that it gets worse the further out of London you go.
Chelsea & Westminster - usually quite fast and efficient
Epsom General - more relaxed but still good chance of survival
Poole - congrats you’ve just died

Anarchy99 · 01/06/2026 00:41

Lougle · 31/05/2026 22:36

I think my local A&E have got it pretty well sorted, although they face the same time pressures everyone describes.

  • On arrival, book in at desk
  • Triage 1 is within 5-15 minutes: Sats probe and describe reason for attendance. They decide if you're fit for triage 2, or if you need RAT (Rapid Assessment and Treatment) or Resus
Triage 2 probably 15 minutes after that: More detailed history and full initial obs. They decide what initial investigations are needed. They arrange initial pain relief as needed Initial assessment: They take bloods/insert cannula/do ECG, get urine sample as needed.

Then you are filtered to majors/minors

Once there, you sit in chairs, waiting for a doctor. Obs/pain relief/fluids are given as required.

Depending on how busy they are and how ill you are, they may take you around to a trolley, but they only have about 12.

Oh yes i had pain relief several hours after getting there. I also had a drip and got bollocked by the nurse for not keeping my arm at the wrong angle (having never had one before)

Lougle · 31/05/2026 22:36

I think my local A&E have got it pretty well sorted, although they face the same time pressures everyone describes.

  • On arrival, book in at desk
  • Triage 1 is within 5-15 minutes: Sats probe and describe reason for attendance. They decide if you're fit for triage 2, or if you need RAT (Rapid Assessment and Treatment) or Resus
Triage 2 probably 15 minutes after that: More detailed history and full initial obs. They decide what initial investigations are needed. They arrange initial pain relief as needed Initial assessment: They take bloods/insert cannula/do ECG, get urine sample as needed.

Then you are filtered to majors/minors

Once there, you sit in chairs, waiting for a doctor. Obs/pain relief/fluids are given as required.

Depending on how busy they are and how ill you are, they may take you around to a trolley, but they only have about 12.

Pistachiocake · 31/05/2026 22:29

Are you fairly young and generally healthy? Anyone who isn't doesn't seem to have anything positive to say about our AE.
Old man left to sit in a chair for 2 days (GP said it was urgent for him to go). That wouldn't be nice for a healthy 20 year old to manage. If his family hadn't intervened, how long would he have been left?
Cancer patients left in agony when they had to use AE.
Woman forced to lose her baby in AE corridor. Those lucky enough to have healthy pregnancies get a delivery suite to themselves.

Anarchy99 · 31/05/2026 22:24

HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 22:08

Total time in hospital was fractionally under 9 hours. Obviously much of that was waiting (apologies for not timing it versus treatment time).
Your use of “apparently” is somewhat patronising, love.

No it wasn’t patronising - I was relaying that it wasn’t a 9 hour wait. It was ‘apparently’ in the sense of ‘that’s what was said’.

I have no reason to doubt you, I was just explaining to someone who hadn’t read the full thread.

Bit prickly, aren’t you?

Anon9898 · 31/05/2026 22:19

I haven't had much experience myself and like hospitals but at work we have been doing the Oliver McGowan training and I was in tears about the way he was treated. Now I worry every time I have to attend one of them

I spent a lot of time with my mum in them and staff were always nice and attentive

HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 22:08

Anarchy99 · 31/05/2026 21:08

She didn’t wait 9 hours - most of it was treatment apparently.

Total time in hospital was fractionally under 9 hours. Obviously much of that was waiting (apologies for not timing it versus treatment time).
Your use of “apparently” is somewhat patronising, love.

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HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 22:06

Ophir · 31/05/2026 21:34

YABU What a ridiculous post

Cracking bit of analysis there. Thanks for your contribution!

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HotTiredDog · 31/05/2026 22:05

Anarchy99 · 31/05/2026 21:45

Possibly. People are dying in corridors and more will die as a result of not being prepared to engage. I’m on the verge of disengaging from all medical care because the combination of hospitals, GPs and the people that deal with my medical condition couldn’t organise a piss up in a brewery.

That’s sad, to put it mildly. Surely though, the only person who will suffer is you? And the Health Secretary, NHS management etc won’t have a clue.

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