AIBU not to answer the door about the neighbour's fence?

oh, you need access from neighbour's side? We should go check with her then (gestures in the direction of the house they are talking about). perfectly normal.

What is weird is to hide and ignore repeated knocking and then spend time wondering what they might have wanted.

Lol

You make it sound like they shinned up her drainpipe and tried to climb through the window 🫣

Because they were obviously talking about the OP and/or her house 🤷‍♀️

Using excuses to be difficult, they saw you were in probably thought nip over and your looking like an awkward neighbour I wouldn't want to have tbh

People only knock persistently if you don’t answer the door! If they come round tomorrow, you could just say that you were in the shower so couldn’t answer. No need to go into details of bowel movements or give them reason to believe you are one of those odd people who don’t answer the door. Better hope they weren’t going to tell you that your chimney is about to fall down.

This is MN where people leap behind their sofas when the doorbell rings, and hide in their cars to avoid speaking to their neighbours in the streets.

Some years ago I saw a group of sales people knocking on doors up and down the street. I was in my lounge in full view of anyone coming to the front door. A salesman knocked and I ignored it. He knocked again and then when I still didn't answer waved at me through the window. I shook my head and he made a please gesture.

I do think it's rude to keep knocking when it's clear you're not answering even when they know you're in.

Having said that if I thought it was about a shared fence I'm nosey enough to have answered just to learn the plan.

How do people like you get through the day?
Someone knocking on your door does not in any way violate your private, safe space.

It really is fine for your neighbour to point at your house. Although I'm not sure I would have been bothered about having a conversation about a fence on a Saturday night after a few drinks either.

Oh my days. Feeling for the neighbours here tbh. If you didn’t want to discuss just open the window and say it’s not a good time can we chat tomorrow

Why do they need to point at her house though? It is weird.

If your fence is the other side you don't pay anything. But answer the door, do you have a chain if you are nervous about who is there?

I totally understand and agree with you OP, homes should be private safe spaces they shouldn't keep.on knocking if its obvious, for whatever reason you dont want to answer

I’m sorry OP but what you’ve just posted makes you sound bonkers. It’s a very normal type of thing to happen especially this time of year when people get outdoor work done. The neighbour was in the garden chatting about work with a workman and happened to say “I’ll need to discuss it with Liesmorelies next door “ and gesticulated to your house and you happened to look out. Then they went to have a chat with you about it. I can’t get my head around why you are finding any of this odd. However based on what you’ve just posted they might have been telling the workman “we will have to try to humour the cranky cow next door”

If you didn't behave weirdly and refuse to answer your door, they wouldn't have had to knock loads.

Good grief. If you’d just answered the door you’d know what it was all about! Who knows why they were pointing, perhaps they like your windows? Who knows? Who cares. I despair with some of the ridiculous behaviour on MN.

They were probably pointing at your house to say "That's the house the fence is shared with" in order to knock on the correct door - you explained it's not a straight row of houses with a neighbour each side.

I've only encountered the not answering the door when you're in, don't live somewhere seriously dodgy, and it's not very late or extremely early (i.e. you weren't ready for bed) on Mumsnet, and I'm not young and have lived in multiple different places, from a not great area of London to a town in Asia to a rural village in mainland Europe. I've never encountered people who are obviously in not answering the door at ordinary times of day. If people take a minute it's probably because they were on the toilet in the middle of something or are less mobile and take a minute to get up and to the door - my elderly parents wouldn't be happy if people who'd seen they were in didn't wait for them to get to the door, for example.

Remember if they have the ddog it's up to them to keep it out of your garden not you.

Neighbours looking at house… shock horror! They might have spotted something wrong with your roof or something like that?! And they only persisted with knocking because they knew you were in and probably thought you hadn’t heard them. Why you would choose to take offence at this I don’t know unless you really have had quite a bit to drink

😂 You had to be looking somewhere which happened to be right at them in their garden.

The fact they were pointing at the house would actually make me think there was a problem with my house like the roof or guttering and they were popping round to tell me.

And no, knocking when they know you are in is not incredibly rude. Tbh I'd lay off the drink if you felt too drunk to answer the door.

Christ on a bike, why can noone have a simple conversation about anything anymore? We have a massive ivy infestation in the garden of our new place. DH has been cutting it back on our side and revealed a very damaged wall and fence. So we will be wanting to discuss with the blinking neighbours about acceptable solutions. I hope they don't hide from us. Currently we have a foreign car so are probably terrifying.

Maybe they need to talk to you urgently or assume you can't hear given they know you're there but didn't answer the door. You could of just been polite and said no thanks if they were trying to talk to you about something you didn't want to talk about. I don't get the big deal.

Best time to knock is when you know someone is in.
Maybe they had knocked before when you were at lunch?
They were probably looking at the house when you opened the curtains and thought "now is a good time to go around".

If they knock tomorrow, explain it away by saying you had a terrible case of the runs and could not make it to the door with a toilet strapped to your backside.💩