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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder why this is 'common'?

229 replies

Ellbee83 · 30/05/2026 18:41

I live in an end-terrace house, with a small front yard/garden which I've made as nice as I can with plants, garden furniture, a few fairy lights.
It's south-facing so for (literally!) a few months of the year when the weather allows, if I'm at home and not busy, it's lovely to sit out in the morning with a coffee, or in the evening with a book & glass of wine.
It's genuinely one of my simple pleasures, it's nice to watch the world go by, smile at passers-by, idly chat with the neighbours if they're around but mostly 100% minding my own business and enjoying my own outdoor space.

Yesterday evening, my neighbour (72f) from 3 doors down went past, walking her dogs. She stopped to chat as we often do - the weather, how the flowers are doing, that sort of thing, nothing major! She then went on to tell me how she wouldn't dream of sitting out in her front garden as she'd been taught it was 'common'. I laughed in surprise and said 'Oh, am I being common?' to which she laughingly agreed I was!

Now, tbh, I found it waaaay more common that she'd be so rude but I'm curious - is sitting out in the sun, in your own front garden seen as 'common'?
Not too bothered either way and I'll carry on doing it but I've restricted myself to the back garden today 🫤

Interested to hear opinions!

OP posts:
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justasking111 · 02/06/2026 15:01

I seem to recall that you didn't hang washing out on a Sunday. But that was the day of garden bonfire so might have been a sensible move.

omghereistrouble · 02/06/2026 09:13

well i was always told that but if you are ok then carry on. same as do not hang washing out the front but if that is all you have so be it.
A few years ago I lived in a rough part of the city and there used to be the 'chavs' who would sit on there doorsteps morning to bed time and always in pjs! you had to walk up the road to wait for the bus and i am not sure who was more scary these women in pjs, the men in half mast shorts beer bellies on display or the feral kids running riot!

ticklyfeet · 01/06/2026 07:55

Longdarkcloud · 30/05/2026 20:48

When visiting a friend in San Francisco a few years back I commented on the absence of clothes lines and received a strange look and was told it was considered totally not on. I think in some areas Neighbourhood Associations forbid their use as it lowers the tone.
Ihadn’t thought about what constituted common for years but now the memories come flooding back. Guess then certain customs are no longer useful they just get dropped.
My mother ( born in 1920) felt the use of dummies was common.

When my first baby was born in the early 1980s my mother was horrified when I mentioned the word "dummy". I could see it took all her composure not to slap me!

"It's a baby's soother, not a dummy...you do realise that's short for dummy tit! You and I will have a major fall out if I hear you call it that again."
Some people are just mental. 🤷‍♀️

Sartre · 01/06/2026 06:39

It is traditionally viewed as common yes but I don’t see an issue at all provided you’re not sitting there practically naked sunbathing or blasting tinny music of course! Your set up actually sounds quite lovely.

Tontostitis · 01/06/2026 06:18

She was making conversation and commenting on her own changing attitude. She really wasn't rude

sashh · 01/06/2026 05:57

In the old fashioned sense yes it is 'common'.

But so are a load of things we do every day, eating in the street, smoking in the street. For my grandmother, lighting her own cigarette out side the house.

In the days of smoking everywhere she would take out a cigarette, put it between her fingers and hold it out a little way for the nearest man to light it.

A woman wearing trousers was also common unless it was your uniform for working in a munitions factory.

Opening your own car door when there is a man to do it.

Empress13 · 01/06/2026 05:54

It’s not a thing to do where I live but if you feel comfortable doing it then carry on. Your house your rules !

ChocolateCinderToffee · 01/06/2026 05:54

HorrorPudding · 30/05/2026 20:40

@NameChangeMay2026and @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime both of those were Nicky Haslam, but it is all one big joke to him. Especially when someone buys a £50 tea towel to study the list and remove from their life anything on the list marked as “common”, when he’s just thought of anything and added it. He’s yet to add “buying a £50 tea towel” to his list of common things.

I see he’s put ‘yellow bags’ on the example pictured, why’s available from Selfridges . . .

Definitely tongue in cheek.

echt · 01/06/2026 05:14

Not part of the "common" nature of this thread, but what about stunt front garden furniture?
It's certainly a bit of a thing in my bit of Melbourne, the table and chairs or bench set out in the front garden but never used. These are gardens without high walls, obvs.

I have no room to talk as I have stunt furniture on the balcony outside my bedroom. Why not used? my back to back neighbour's horrendous pool pump and the uncomfortable fact that the Aussie sun is very quickly unbearable, even in winter.

OhThePotential · 01/06/2026 04:47

Dontlletmedownbruce · 31/05/2026 16:56

Oh yes. My mum thought they were common too, I had forgotten this. We were never allowed them.

I’d also forgotten this. She allowed canned tomato or oxtail soup and tinned ravioli/spag bol with toast but not beans. Born 1926.

I think beans (especially Branston ones) delicious on buttered toast but still don’t think to make them more than once a year or so. I have tinned soup, stew or curry about once a week though.

Pandimoanymum · 31/05/2026 18:58

ShanghaiDiva · 30/05/2026 18:44

I think it’s not usual to sit in the front garden as it’s not as private, but imo only ‘common’ if you are sitting on the doorstep in a grey vest with a beer belly, fag in your mouth and a can of 4X at 9.30 in the morning.

This.

Quine0nline · 31/05/2026 18:53

Dontlletmedownbruce · 31/05/2026 16:56

Oh yes. My mum thought they were common too, I had forgotten this. We were never allowed them.

We used to love baked beans with our breakfasts on board HMS Ark Royal' wardroom. We got a supply officer who banned them as they were not "officer like". There was a riot.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 31/05/2026 16:56

Fraughtmum · 31/05/2026 06:46

My DM born 1920s thought baked beans were common. Never had them till Uni.

Oh yes. My mum thought they were common too, I had forgotten this. We were never allowed them.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 31/05/2026 16:52

Yes common according to my parents. Hanging out laundry was also common so I'd take everything they say with a pinch of salt.

TreesinthePark · 31/05/2026 16:19

I rented a north facing terrace with a small yard for years. Thr front doors opened direct on to the street, no front yard at all.
A couple of the older neighbours used to put their deckchairs on the pavement to enjoy the sun together! I never thought it was common, I thought it was people enjoying the home they pay for.

italianlondongirl · 31/05/2026 16:17

Gillygallygosh123 · 30/05/2026 20:17

Yes this is how I took it

I think it’s so sad that people can’t understand the nuances of jokes any more.

ConverselyAttired · 31/05/2026 16:15

This is so weird. I have a 25ft long front garden (terraced townhouse) with loads of plants and a patio set under the kitchen window (so about 20ft from the pavement). I sit there all the time!

ConverselyAttired · 31/05/2026 16:14

This is so weird. I have a 25ft long front garden (terraced townhouse) with loads of plants and a patio set under the kitchen window (so about 20ft from the pavement). I sit there all the time!

italianlondongirl · 31/05/2026 16:11

She was joking with you!!

YourShyLion · 31/05/2026 16:10

I'd never sit out in my front garden 🫣

deeahgwitch · 31/05/2026 16:08

I agree with @WonderingWandathat it is from days gone by when poorer people only had a yard at the back while those a step or two up the social ladder had a back garden.
“Tuppence halfpenny looking down on tuppence” as the saying goes.
On a road near me, one side of the road has houses with south/south west facing back gardens with great sunshine while the houses on the opposite side have north/north east facing back gardens that don’t get much sun and are fairly dismal.
Some homeowners with the north facing back gardens have created seating areas in their sunny front gardens with really beautiful planting to give them privacy from the road.
One that is particularly lovely has a patio with a raised bed full of large luscious white hydrangeas in front of it and patio doors at the front out onto it.

FunnyOrca · 31/05/2026 15:02

We used to live on the periphery of a very nice area in London. I once walked through during Wimbledon on a very nice day and a couple had pulled their sofa into the front garden and turned the tv to face out of the open window so that they were sitting in their front garden watching Wimbledon through the window! They had made lemonade pimms and were inviting people to join them. I couldn’t stop but it looked fun and also fancy! It’s all in how you carry it off!

Equally, seen a lot of sofas plonked in front of East London terraces that don’t have quite the same vibe, but I’m sure are equally well enjoyed on a nice day.

JunesDunes · 31/05/2026 10:57

Tonissister · 31/05/2026 10:48

I love seeing people in their front gardens. It's very sociable.

It's funny what is classified as common. My dad point blank refused to let us have our ears pierced as it was 'common'. But I was in my mid twenties when a friend told me she was amazed that I would happily eat a sandwich while walking down the street, as eating in public, especially while walking, is very common.

I HATE people walking and eating. My husband does it and it makes me cringe every time. Then my daughter has a strop because I make her sit down if she is eating "but dad does it!". I hate it, hate it, hate it!

If you absolutely must (because there are no seats or something) then at least stand still while eating.

Did I say that I hate it?

I know it's a me problem. 🤣

Tonissister · 31/05/2026 10:48

I love seeing people in their front gardens. It's very sociable.

It's funny what is classified as common. My dad point blank refused to let us have our ears pierced as it was 'common'. But I was in my mid twenties when a friend told me she was amazed that I would happily eat a sandwich while walking down the street, as eating in public, especially while walking, is very common.

SlightlyAjar · 31/05/2026 10:45

sprigatito · 31/05/2026 10:20

The whole concept of “common” needs to die a long-overdue death. My front garden is a vegetable patch. I couldn’t give a witch’s tit how my neighbours feel about it.

Well, I don’t disagree, but to do this, you’re going to have to dismantle the UK class system and class aspirationalism.