To be upset about invitation

Weddings are expensive nightmares and guest lists are a battleground. That’s why they aren’t giving everyone a plus one. It’s not about you.

Why? Can't people do things themselves?

I think the majority on here are mad!

You dont ever give an invite to a wedding for one person, you say plus one

You’ve been with him 12w and want an invite to a wedding in a few months so assume summer wedding

I have cheese in my fridge older than your relationship 😂 - that’s not meant to be rude - but simply pointing out 3mths is nothing in dating times and especially not for weddings and extra costs to the b&g

I wouldn't invite you to a wedding with your partner of 3 months. Probably because am sure most of the arrangements & budget for everything were done months ago rather than didn't want to meet him.
Not sure why you're embarrassed though, strange reaction. Go to the wedding, have fun? Or not. Either way it's up to you and hope you and the fella carry on getting along well.

I agree with you OP, if it's about not wanting a stranger at the wedding why are the other partners invited, they won't have ever met those people either. And why can't you just come on your own, well why can't your colleagues just come on their own? They could but don't want to?? Exactly the same as OP then.

I think everyone should get a plus one, or no one does. It should be the same in each group (close family, extended fam, friend group, colleagues).

However, few people agree with us. So we just have to accept that.

I don’t think the B and G have done anything wrong. They don’t even know if you will still be dating this man by the day of their wedding.

Yes it may feel awkward when you are the only one from your group going solo but the reason why is clear to everyone and I’m sure you haven’t been singled out. Any other guests not in long term relationships will also be invited solo.

This is the B and Gs day. If you feel you can go along and celebrate them, go. Otherwise it’s fine to send your regrets.

oh come on 3 months is nothing 😂 you could be spiilt up by the time the day comes!

Why on earth would anyone feel embarrassed? This is really way overthinking this

3 months is nothing. The fact you can't understand why a couple wouldn't invite their colleague's boyfriend of 3 months to their actual wedding makes me think you must be very young.

YANBU op! The couple should have either issued all work colleagues with a plus one invite or none at all. It’s natural you will feel embarrassed by being invited solo while everyone else im work has a plus one- how are people even giving you grief for that?

You are being sensitive and weird about this honestly

you’re colleagues not friends/family. Your entire invite was extended because of politeness, you’re not a priority guest here for the bride / groom for them to extend a plus one. I don’t mean that in a nasty way but I think you’re overstepping normal colleague boundaries. When you’re planning a wedding sometimes you don’t allow friends and family to bring plus ones for a number of reasons, let alone colleagues. There is going to be a social hierarchy here. Numbers might be tight etc, budget reasons.

secondly, you’ve known the guy for 3 months. You’re 50. It’s totally normal for your colleagues to not have taken such a recent relationship into consideration. You have been with him for 0.5% of your entire life. It is relevant that others invited are in long term relationships.

YABU I only invited long term/serious partners to my wedding. We made it very clear it wasn’t a plus one and if they were to break up it didn’t turn into a plus one (as happened with one guest).

I think it’s very rude to have a wedding and not invite someone else’s long term partner but not rude to not give someone a plus one.

Presumably the numbers were planned and invitations sent before OP met her new boyfriend

I know things have gone up since I got married 22 years ago but £200 pp? Is it a tasting menu?

And FWIW I didn't have any colleagues at my wedding. We did invite a couple of people we both worked with when we'd met though.

It’s people like the OP who make what should be an exciting and fun life event - planning a wedding - so stressful. And fucking expensive.

Get a grip, this is not about you.

Does your colleague know about your new boyfriend?
I am quite brazen. This happened to me and I just asked my friend if anyone dropped out, is it possible to let my boyfriend to come to the wedding (we had been together about 4 months but she had met him a few times).

She later invited him. Less than a year later, her and her husband attended our wedding..

I totally get the awkward going to a wedding solo is you aren't used to it thing. Personally, I'd politely decline due to previous commitments and send a lovely present and card. They will probably breathe a huge sigh of relief that the boss isn't coming and you don't have to grit your teeth through an awkward evening.

You can see from the voting - The not inviting your plus one says nothing about whether she wants YOU at her wedding. All your friends and colleagues will not be batting an eyelid at this. It’s totally normal not to invite +1’s who are new. It doesn’t say anything about how much she values you or wants you there. YOU have been invited to her most special day. It will be fine on your own as you know other work colleagues going. Enjoy the day.

Odd reaction from you.

But it’s not about if they are strangers or not. They are all in long term relationships and it’s an acknowledgment of that. Try and look at it from the bride and groom’s point of view and not yours. I am long term single but if I met someone now or even 6 months ago there is no way I’d have an expectation of my new partner being invited. YABU.

If you are in management or honestly even as a coworker you will undermine your professionalism so terribly complainiabout this. I have second hand embarrassment reading this. Please do not do this.

If you don’t want to go solo, politely decline and if anyone asks you’re pre booked for a weekend with your new man

You’re being absolutely pathetic.

This man is practically a stranger to YOU never mind the bride and groom.

I don't think they've done anything wrong, here. 3 months of dating is a short time and you'll have other guests from work to talk to if you go.

But it's also ok to feel self conscious at going to a wedding solo for the first time and being the only one in the group that isn't married/in a long-term relationship.

The good news is that you do not have to attend a coworker's wedding, and if you don't have a substantial personal relationship outside of work then you don't even need to think twice about RSVPing no. This isn't the level of relationship where you're expected to bend over backwards to make their wedding, so just say you're not able to make that weekend, wish her well, and send a card and small gift as you wish.