Should our 10-year-old contribute to replacing the broken car charge cover?

I would do this too.

No, it sounds like an accident. I wonder why she didn’t tell you?

We don't know if she has been told before and if so, how often.

I wouldn't make your daughter pay for full £118 but I would stop several weeks worth of pocket money. Yes, your daughter is 10, but she also needs to learn there's consequences to actions. It was an accident, but it wouldn't have happened if your daughter hadn't been playing football by the car. Presumably, she's been told before not to do this? Also she didn't tell you when it happened, and you had to find out. You need a conversation with your daughter, about being upfront when something goes wrong.

The sulking this morning, when you asked her to help you around the house, would have really annoyed me! She's already in trouble for breaking the car charger cover, and not being upfront about it....so sulking is the last thing she should be doing!! So yes, in light of the sulking and the rest, you need to stop her pocket money for a few weeks! All behaviour has consequences, it's a lesson she needs to learn!!

It depends how clear in the past you have made it that she is not to play near your car.

Do you not watch her playing outside?

She's only 10 and unless you've really driven home where she is allowed to play football I think you're being unreasonable to 'fine her'.

It's partly a parental issue because balls and cars nearby don't mix.
She needs very clear reminders.

I wouldn't expect her to contribute financially. But there should be some sort of consequence...not so much for the breakage (which was an accident) but for not telling you about it. Maybe extra chores around the house for a couple weeks?

No, she’s not an adult with a job. I think at 10 years old, instead of say, 15, it’s an issue of not being supervised properly.

Dock the pocket money and she also has to do work around the house. Ten is old enough to know and learn about the value of money and things. Kids play but it will teach her to be more careful, no need to play by the car and that when these type of things happen, there is a consequence to them in that it costs money and or time to repair. Its a good life lesson.

I think the fact that she didn't tell you needs further discussion, whatever else you do. Did she not notice? Not know what the device was/didn't think it was damaged? Did she think the damage would be overlooked even when you returned the car? Or that you would think it happened naturally/someone else did it? Or did she just not think? Explain to her what the issue is and make sure she understands that she needs to tell an adult right away of something like that happens again, and why.

Did you make it clear that her extra help around the house was a punishment, or a way to help pay for the damage? If you meant it to be one of those things, I think it's important to make it clear and require her to do specific tasks, not just suggest. If you want to make her responsible in some way (which is reasonable) you could offer her the choice of paying say 10% of the costs out of her own money OR doing selected extra chores around the house.

She is 10 - she shouldn’t need constant supervision.

And to the PP - She is also old enough to understand about going to work without having to have it explained ‘kindly’

Charge her a token amount, and ensure you are actually supervising her.

Despite it being an accident it still costs money to replace it. Quite a lot of money by anyone's standaeds. And it's an accident caused by her being careless, it's not like she dropped a cup on the floor.

There's no need to be cross about it, but she needs to have some involvement in solving the issue IMHO. Personally I'd give her some extra chores to do to "pay" for it and explain kindly that you go to work to earn money so that you can pay to fix stuff. I wouldn't go ballistic and try and shame her but nor would I completely let her off the hook.

No. It was an accident and she’s only 10.

Contribute to the cost, yes; pay for it all, no. Although £5 is generous pocket money, it will take her months to pay off the full amount. I'd probably make her pay £20 towards the cost and either dock the full pocket money for a month, or give her less pocket money over a longer period.

I'd be more annoyed about her not admitting to the damage than about being silly and playing where she shouldn't. If she'd owned up straight away and apologised, I probably wouldn't make her contribute anything, as we all do dumb things sometimes. You need to address why she didn't feel she could admit to the accident. (She was probably embarrassed and afraid of consequences, but the message about doing the right things needs to be reinforced.)

I would never punish a child for having an accident

Take this as a opportunity. She will have to pay it, some will be payed with her pocket money and some with extra chores after she does her usual stuff tidying etc for free because that is not something to be payed for that is normal stuff.
Two birds one stone. You have to replace that thing anyway and she will learn a bit of responsibility.

agree

I would be more annoyed about the fact that she didn't own up to it, rather than the money.

Maybe dock a week just to get the message across that things cost money, but charging her the full amount is completely over the top for what was an accident.

Whether they’ve had that talk with her or not it hasn’t gone in or been listened too

My god yes! She's 10 and it was an accident!

Yes, she pays for part of it

I think yes to contributing but not the full amount as it feels a bit too unobtainable. They need to start understanding the value of money and also that being careless has consequences. I’ve also got to the point with my own 10 year old where she has to replace things she’s lost through carelessness.

There are accidents and accidents. I keep saying to my own children that accidents that happen as a result of them prating about or doing things they’ve specifically been told not to aren’t really accidents. If she had been more apologetic I’d feel differently but it sounds like she doesn’t really give a shit so I think a harsher consequence is needed especially as the car is a lease one.

I have a friend who was in penury most of her teen years because she and her brother were paying back the replacement of the porch window after they broke it a few years before.
I thought it was awful and my parents agreed. But, guess what? All four kids from that family are incredibly successful, money savvy while still being generous and great musicians to boot!
Their mother was a primary school principal. She clearly knew what she was doing. They'd all die for her too. They respect, revere and love her to death. Tough love is tougher on the parents but does kids a world of good!

Agree. She's 10, and it was an accident.