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Original poster

If you owned a pub, what would you call it?

154 replies

BiteSizedLife · 28/05/2026 17:41

I'll go:

"The Fat Labrador"

or simply The Fat Lab

I would be known for serving generous portions and puddings would swim in custard.

OP posts:
5arkypants · 28/05/2026 23:47

Went to a club call The Fat Badger last year. I think it was named after me!

ChamonixMountainBum · 28/05/2026 23:47

VanillaTime · 28/05/2026 22:19

The Precious First Born (sounds a bit sinister!)
The Fanny Gallops
The Picky Bits
The Cancelled Cheque
The Naice Ham
The Left Bastard
The Lodged Cock

etc etc

The Ducks in a Row
The Leave the Bastard

ChamonixMountainBum · 28/05/2026 23:45

The Bingo Wings Arms

AWeeCupOfTeaAndAnIndividualFruitTrifle · 28/05/2026 23:41

TheKittenswithMittens · 28/05/2026 21:32

I am watching "Some Like it hot", so "Some like it hot"

"Warm beer, get it here; roll up, roll up!!"

JoyousAsOtters · 28/05/2026 23:24

The Viper’s Nest
The Comfort and Joy

ObelixtheGaul · 28/05/2026 22:40

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 28/05/2026 22:18

The Hungary Biscuit. After my Hungarian rescue dog. Will have a cheevenings. Cheese evenings, where crackers, crusty bread and pickles are served.

Cheevenings is a good name for a pub.

AltitudeCheck · 28/05/2026 22:28

My upmarket wine bar would be called Moderation so you could always drink in Moderation.

My pub would be the Man in the boat

Chiefangel · 28/05/2026 22:20

The vicious otter

Im imaging a tough otter type pet as security here.

VanillaTime · 28/05/2026 22:19

The Precious First Born (sounds a bit sinister!)
The Fanny Gallops
The Picky Bits
The Cancelled Cheque
The Naice Ham
The Left Bastard
The Lodged Cock

etc etc

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 28/05/2026 22:18

The Hungary Biscuit. After my Hungarian rescue dog. Will have a cheevenings. Cheese evenings, where crackers, crusty bread and pickles are served.

Thedogswhiskers · 28/05/2026 22:15

Snapespeare · 28/05/2026 19:11

There's a micro pub called 'The Handsome Sam' in Whitstable accompanied with a pub sign of a beautiful tuxedo cat - I've never been in, but I'm lured by the signage..

I have a selection:
The Gallifrey (niche) (sign is gallifreyan for 'pub')
The Pankhurst Arms (sign is Emmeline, Christabel, Sylvia and Adele in the Queen bohemian rhapsody formation)
The Bedknob and Broomstick (Angela Lansbury with a raised eyebrow)

Show quote history

I saw that today! But closed due to the water being turned off in the area 😕

Inextremis · 28/05/2026 22:10

Somerhalders Arms, just in case a certain Ian was ever in the area. Plus it's where I dream of being (though I'm really too old to be crushing!).

AWeeCupOfTeaAndAnIndividualFruitTrifle · 28/05/2026 22:09

The Kebab & Calculator.

canuckup · 28/05/2026 22:07

The old goat

15minutesaday · 28/05/2026 22:05

The Prince Albert, the sign would have a massive willy with a piercing.

Mumsnet themed - the Spider's Willy, the sign would be a spider with 9 legs..

BrickProblems · 28/05/2026 22:02

I think either The Golden Age - all themed around golden age detective fiction and lots of books/cosy reading spaces - or The Witch’s Hat and make it all starry and velvety inside with strange potions.

RubyPowderPuff · 28/05/2026 22:00

Dog & Tunnel

Just a lovely country pub where dogs would be allowed. So all the haters have to eat somewhere else!
My menu would be comfort food all fresh and organic. It would also feature an extensive vegetarian & vegan options. I'd have an extensive kitchen garden so most of the veg would be homegrown.

There would be a little treat menu for the dogs, each dog would get their own water bowl!

mellongoose · 28/05/2026 21:58

The Snake’s Arms.

Echobelly · 28/05/2026 21:53

OtterandaRock · 28/05/2026 21:50

Sorry, we cross posted! My pubs are in a different area from yours and yours are thriving. I did not mean any insult.

At the Sign of the Poster's Remorse.

Show quote history

Great minds and all that! 😅

Flannelfeet · 28/05/2026 21:53

Donner inn,stagger oot.

alloutofcareunits · 28/05/2026 21:52

Pochohontas · 28/05/2026 21:19

Any other Peep Show fans here.? The Swan and Paedo

I scrolled down to see if anyone had put this 😂 you beat me to it!

OtterandaRock · 28/05/2026 21:50

Echobelly · 28/05/2026 21:36

The Penis Beaker

The Snap and Fart

Balonz

The Wobbly Head

Show quote history

Sorry, we cross posted! My pubs are in a different area from yours and yours are thriving. I did not mean any insult.

At the Sign of the Poster's Remorse.

Itjustnevergetsthere · 28/05/2026 21:49

The Angled Elbow.

TheHateIsNotGood · 28/05/2026 21:45

The Knackered Cow

Original poster
BiteSizedLife · 28/05/2026 21:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

That's not funny tbh. Very poor taste.

OP posts: