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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To get wound up by random men making stupid, rude comments when I’m visibly struggling in public?

588 replies

shutityouduffer · 27/05/2026 13:52

This gets me so fuming. Name changed.

Today I have no car with me. I have to collect something from the post office as it’s needed for a family holiday, we’re setting off early tomorrow. For reference it’s a tabletop barbecue. It said on the John Lewis website it was 12kg and I thought I’d be ok to pick it up myself.

I get the parcel and it’s massive, i cant get my arms around it, and turns out the gross weight of the package is over 20kg. iThe post office is only a 10-min walk from mine, so I pick it up and attempt to carry it, awkwardly and in 25 degree weather.

Now this bbq has “SHARKNINJA” written on the side of the box. A man walks past, can see I’m struggling. He chooses to say, very loudly at me, “SHARK NINJA.” I say yes, trying to move past him. He then turns to his mate and says “I should’ve kicked it.” Wtf???? it doesn’t even make sense - what goes through this man’s head?

Another incident last week - I’m walking my golden retriever, he’s a puppy not yet neutered, but dogs on both sides of the road take exception to him and start barking at him (happens a lot with unneutered males) so I whisk him out into the road to avoid both sets of dogs. No traffic. He’s a softy and he paws at me, because he’s stressed (he wants to be picked up for reference). Man on the pavement shouts, again with a mate, “are you sure you can handle that dog?” As I’m trying to get him safely back onto the pavement. Again what is the point??? I don’t even acknowledge it and then his mate shouts after me, “he was only joking!”

AIBU to be sent into a rage by these stupid comments? I should say a couple of (different) men offered to help with the package and were very kind, so I have no general vendetta against men. But it’s never women making unasked for, unhelpful and rude comments when I’m already visibly stressed out…

OP posts:
MyMilchick · 27/05/2026 14:13

shutityouduffer · 27/05/2026 14:02

I think it was a reference to the box saying “ninja” on it (that being the brand name) but I have no idea in all honesty!

oh fgs, bloody idiot 🙄

Inthezone5578 · 27/05/2026 14:06

Yes. Sat in the pub a few weeks back with my other half. I got up to use the ladies and had to walk past the big screen so I bobbed down while passing so no one missed anything important. A man sat with another bloke at the table next to the ladies says "you aren't that tall you know" I replied maybe not but I've got manners. They were still there when I went for a second visit and I didn't Bob down because I just wanted to be left alone. The creep said you didn't bend over that time. BEND OVER? I'd stooped my head. I was irritated. I just said ahh well, hard shit and continued to the ladies visably irritated

Lindy2 · 27/05/2026 14:05

I assume the kicking comment refers to a Ninja martial arts type move.

I guess they might be trying to be friendly in a misguided sort of way. An actual offer of help would obviously be much more welcome.

TomatoSandwiches · 27/05/2026 14:03

Men

ohyesido · 27/05/2026 14:03

Unsolicited comments from strangers (from a safe distance of course) are so annoying. I struggle to understand what people gain from it, I’ve learned to ignore them and get a kick out of them being discomfited by the lack of reaction.

shutityouduffer · 27/05/2026 14:02

MyMilchick · 27/05/2026 13:57

Was he talking about you or the box when he said I should have kicked it? wtf is wrong with these idiots

I think it was a reference to the box saying “ninja” on it (that being the brand name) but I have no idea in all honesty!

OP posts:
hollyivy123 · 27/05/2026 14:01

Came onto the drive in my car after working nightshift (NHS) at around 7am in the morning utterly exhuasted. Guy walking down the road shouts at me "Been partying all night have you love" in sarcastic tone. As soon as I got out of the car and he saw my uniform he soon shut up. I don't know how they think they've got the right to hurl unwanted comments across the street at people. Vile man

Flamingojune · 27/05/2026 14:00

Its the equivalent of you could get a bus through there brigade ir standing watching whilst you parallel park

Grumpie · 27/05/2026 13:58

Cheer up it might never happen. Someone said that to me when I was leaving the hospital straight after my parent died

TopCatLuther · 27/05/2026 13:58

Am with you OP. It’s because it’s our job to laugh at these witty and erudite observations to bolster their fragile egos 🙄

Katemax82 · 27/05/2026 13:57

These things piss me off too. Twice I've been putting my trolley away at Aldi recently and stupid men have commented on my baby son sat in the trolley (one being "you want to get a refund for him")
Another time my husband and I adopted an unwanted Alsatian puppy in November (we had her until she died aged 13). I was on a walk with her and sat on a bench with her on my lap for a few minutes when some twatty man in the distance shouted "they aren't just for Christmas!"
Cunts

MyMilchick · 27/05/2026 13:57

Was he talking about you or the box when he said I should have kicked it? wtf is wrong with these idiots

MariaMagdalenaa · 27/05/2026 13:55

This is the “cheer up love”- brigade, isn’t it?

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