To get wound up by random men making stupid, rude comments when I’m visibly struggling in public?

I remember distinctly coming out of Tesco with 4 children in lockdown and a mountain of shopping, about two weeks after my husband walked out (taking the family 7 seater and leaving me with the small 3 door runaround) and being told by a man that “you’ve got far too many kids for that tiny car”.

it was the straw that broke the camels back and I think I sobbed for about two hours solid.

Yes, that is very good!

Yes, I agree, they absolutely do it out of a sense of superiority.

Interesting these ‘lonely men’ never try to strike up chat with similarly aged men, or men at all, given the far higher likelihood of it striking up more of an ongoing friendship.

It’s always women, usually alone or with their small children.

Any time a man makes unsolicited comments I usually reply with "sorry I don't have any change".

“Looks like you’ve forgotten the fishes, though, mate”

Yes, that’s excellent! I shall be using this 😁

I once had a twat male making a comment to me about cocaine use as he was passing me by in in my lunch break in Bishopsgate. I either had a cold or bad hayfever and was just sniffing with a tissue, nothing to do with drugs. He was probably going on the fact that as it’s common in the City that he assumed that’s why I was sniffing. Luckily I wasn’t with my colleagues or boss!

Oh God I know EXACTLY what you mean. It’s always men, always 50-70 sort of age group, making bloody irritating unhelpful comments when it’s clear you just need to be left the fuck alone and are more than aware of whatever your ‘problem’ is.

Yesterday I was walking down the pavement (v wide) and stopped as I had a stone in my sandal, which I bashed out. Some bloke walks past and says ‘oooh, your fault for wearing sandals that. Just wear proper shoes’ JUST FUCK OFF.

They don’t do it to be funny, or just as chit chat (I don’t mind chit chat), they do it to momentarily show you up in a ‘aren’t you dizzy/stupid little woman, I would never end up in whatever situation you’re in because I AM MAN’ no matter how minor that situation may be.

I absolutely hate it and don’t even reply now.

I had a similar cheer up situation after my dad died. I'm erm fairly gobby when provoked and let him have it.

He did look shame faced and said very sincerely "I'm so sorry love" to which I said "I'm not your fucking love". I did feel a bit bad for that afterwards as he seemed genuinely sorry but ah well.

I was told I looked like a horse with a nosebag on when masked up at work during covid. All I could manage in reply, as I was chowing down on my oats, was "Oh, well".

Then I trotted off into the distance, kicking up dust into his rheumy old eyes in my wild west dreams 🐎

It really wasn’t.

It's the entitlement to comment that's annoying. I also get, "you've really mastered that" from a man that lives down the road from me about parking on the drive as it's hard to back onto.

When my kids were younger I did get many unsolicited comments from other women- older women; "he must be hot/cold/ he's hungry/tired/winy" thank you ladies it's my baby and I am very attuned to his needs. But on the other hand many lovely comments from women as well.

💯

Actions have consequences.

I hope you told them that! They'd have felt like a right arse! Sorry people are so rude

I'm all for talking to lonely people, but it's not my responsibility to assume every annoying man is lonely, nor is it my responsibility to entertain lonely men!

Pompous, condescending bastard

Perfect, I will be using this!

Similar experience with my DD, who has always been tall for her age but around the age of 12/13, the amount of middle age men gawping at her while we would be shopping was unreal! She now works in a small tesco and the men, (it's ALWAYS a man) making comments 'you look pretty today/I like your silver jewellery (whilst trying to grab her hand)/ your hair is lovely, wish my wife's was like that (yes, really!) 🤬 she ignores/blanks them.

I had a market stall bloke comment 'morning love, cheer up'. He regrets saying that after I bawled him out for a) not being his love and b) my DM was extremely ill and was told she was on palliative care hence my look of utter despair. After asking if he'd say that to a bloke, or my DH, he shook his head and hid behind the rails 🤣 dick.

Another one...a man pushed in front of me (shock) to pick up newspapers from the cabinet outside a shop, I was glaring at the back of his head and was about to say (sarcastically), 'oh please, you go first mate' when another entitled twat came out the shop, saw me glaring and said 'have a bit of patience love, it helps make the world go round'. I just quietly said 'go fuck yourself'. He shrivelled up and walked away. Another dick.

And people are wondering why women aren't having so many children these days...could it be that we are utterly sick of having to deal with these kind of twats?! Who the hell would want children with the kind of idiots we have mentioned on here??!!

Sorry that was so long but this kind of stuff really pisses me off 😤

Wow, so annoying, I think they always think you should be giving them some extensive gratitude as well like a reward!

I had a man say that to me in a shopping centre. I was getting a dress for my mum's funeral I was 24 😞

If there’s more than one, I’ve found that catching the eye of one of the mates and doing a side eye at Mr Stupid turns the tables on these assholes because suddenly their friends are laughing at them instead of with them, and they don’t know why.

It’s very satisfying.

Haven’t worked out a strategy for the lone loudmouths other than fantasising about stabbing them.

Omg - i so so sympathise.
As I'm now older ive started to recognise a pattern of stages...

Young woman era - woman receives unwanted sexual comments and then immediate hostile aggression if you rebuff "oooh you think you're too good for me" kinda thing.

30s 40s early 50s woman - woman receives stupid jokey bants - their crap idea of flirting or whatever ... but still annoying.

late 50s 60s - im now entering this era and in past two weeks alone ive had older men just approach me and literally watch me as ive been carrying something/ unloading a car. The final time i just said "why are you just staring at me it's weird..."
i think this era now attracts attention from men now too old to think of even the inane comments!!

God help us!