I was so tired, but so happy, now i’m just so tired

Totally understand. I’ve never been mad about babies but when I had my own I was like: THIS IS IT!!!! They’re 3 and 5 now and I just want to be a housewife and spend all my time with them- I’m part time, but I don’t give a shit about work. I just feel so happy and fulfilled pottering with my girls

Hope you know this ABBA song OP
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hRr7qRb-7k4&ra=m

Personally I loved it from 6 or 7 onwards best, with the teen years being my absolute favourite era.
Now the ' boys' are adults i love this as well!

I’ve been a SAHM since my little boy was born and it has 100% been the best part of my life so far ♥️ He will be 5 in August and should be starting school but it’s been difficult to find one (he has autism and is still waiting for an EHCP). We are still meeting with schools at the moment and trying to find one that will accept flexischooling as he isn’t ready for full time yet so I think we will have a bit more time in the years of being together a lot of the time (he’s currently at nursery 2 days a week and if we manage to find a school that will do flexischooling he will most likely go 3 days a week) and if not we will home educate until he gets his EHCP ♥️

I’m no spring chicken and had a baby relatively recently, the part of the city I live in a fair few of my mum friends have just had babies at 45 and one of my six year olds best friends had him at 50. Sure it varies lots across the nation but not that unusual where I’m from! X

Agree with all this!

I did not enjoy the first few years. I was so tired and bored. Loved 6 to 12 and then I liked the teen years the best. There are plenty of good years ahead!

But loads of us are working from home now?

My second starts school in September and I feel very similar. I will be going full time after 8 years of part time and being with my DD and DS. I know the days will be long and hectic and I will miss the slower pace and being with my kids so much. Unfortunately financially it has to be done. Sigh.

Yep, I feel the same way op.

I didn't even want children initially, I had fun in my teens and 20's doing just what I wanted then something hit me at 27 and I knew I wanted a family. It took me a while to get pregnant and I eventually had my two dc in my 30's. Due to some work issues I ended up becoming a SAHM for a year or two but that turned into 10 years by choice because I loved it so much.

My kids are 18 and 21 now and they are fantastic humans and I have a great relationship with them. I work and have my own life but nothing, absolutely nothing compares to those wonderful days when I was able to spend all of that time with them in their younger years.

It's not everyone's cup of tea but I regret not a single moment. Those 10 years were and will probably always be the single most happiest decade of my life (even better than those carefree teens and 20's years where I had a blast).

@Whereisthegrassasgreen Maybe that will be the best time of your life for you

I mean, everyone's got to have one bit that's the best haven't they

But life does move on and that doesn't mean life isn't good anymore. Just different. And there's still good things.

I guess it's just very different for you because you went from never working for all those years to working so you'll really feel the difference.

(Fwiw I loved the early years too although I worked 2 days a week so I always had both worlds). I work more days now)

This
It's very important that people feel comfortable with saying that returning to work for whatever reason was the right choice.
And for people to say that they found parenting hard work, lonely and isolating. And they didn't always enjoy it.
I truly understood how nice it can be to spend time with your babies and young children and not have to work but for others it isn't always a positive experience. Children can also benefit from spending time with someone other than their parents and feel proud that their parents have worked to support them.
Each situation is different and it's important to not lose sight of yourself when you are a parent. Parenting is all consuming and it's to the advantage of all (including relationships) that your entire life and individuality isn't drowned by parenting.

YANBU!

One of the huge benefits I found was the home educating was spending so much of the first 16 years of my DCs lives with them. Precious memories.

I feel you op, my two are four years apart and my second will be four in August so he's off to school. After 8 years of having a baby/preschooler at home I'm a little sad that this stage is over. DD is nearly 8 now and I adore her, watching her become the independent and strong person she's turning into is a privilege but I miss spending so much time with her, between school and her myriad hobbies (which she loves). I've been a SAHM and I've worked, I'm a SAHM now and it's an absolute joy for me, I don't miss working at all. It'll be strange come September, I'm not really looking forward to it!

I loved the pre school years too. I had 3 under 3 and my life was just baby groups and days mooching with friends. It was honestly so lovely being with my little girls.my girls are now all teenagers and I love this stage just as much. Cinema trips, long drives to their hobbies and chatting about their lives on the way. Holidays and gigs with them.
I think the teenage years are almost as good. I work full time now but its less of a juggle mostly!
The better part of them being teenagers is that the relationship with my husband is much stronger than when they were pre schoolers. We get so much more time together. I found i was so tired when they were little and you obviously couldn't leave them at home to pop out for a walk or quick drink at the pub together.
There is lots to look forward too.

Have you posted before OP? Someone else posted something almost identical a while ago. I think you're just mourning her growing up. Therefore will be different enjoyable times on the way.

Alot of people share your experience.
I was extremely lonely when my son was a baby and I loved him very much.

This
And for the parents who were /are not in the position to not work, there are multiple opportunities to spend time and create memories and experiences too.

Yes it was hard leaving DC at nursery and going to work then picking up at 6pm. Just feel lucky to have the time to have done what you did as many of us have missed this luxury. Xx

My daughter is 11 and she comes home telling me all her dramas at school. I go to the supermarket or shops and she comes along too. Picks clothes with me. We have pets and she's becoming an animal whisperer just like me. We are building a pond at the moment. She loves to straighten or curl my hair at night (whilst telling all of her school dramas). I am an insomniac, so is she. When my husband and son are fast asleep and we are wide awake we sit in her bed with the curtains open with a stargazing app on my phone. She is fabulous, she is in some ways just like me which I love but in other ways nothing like me which I love even more. I did not think I would like this stage but I love it even more than the younger stage.

Friday night board games and popcorn is the best now they can actually play decent games and accept not winning!

Receiving an out of the blue Whatsapp from my son when he was at uni thanking me for being such a great and understanding Mum. At the time I genuinely thought one of his friends had got hold of his phone and sent it for a laugh.

However he confirmed it was from him and that other people he had met did not have good relationships with their parents and so he wanted me to know how grateful he was 😍

I couldn’t face going back to work, and didn’t want to rely on paid childcare settings either side of school, so I went self employed. I work odd hours but I can fit in family life and be present. Is this something you can consider?

Making a home, being part of a community, making a community, is as valid as 'going out to work' which may not be at all interesting or useful. We lost our communities because everyone is at work and this really is not progress.

This is really lovely, I didn’t enjoy my maternity leave much. I would probably enjoy being off with her now that she’s a toddler but I found the baby stage so hard, lonely and boring (everyone at work, no one to do anything with and a screaming baby all the time). I went back to work when she was 9 months old. I started to enjoy her a lot more after age one. I’m a little envious of people who had the opposite experience to me

YANBU at all! I went back to work when DD started school and I quit 2 months ago. I am sooooo much happier! I can do all drop offs and pick ups, we do activities after school, I help with school trips, and as a whole family we eat so much healthier, our home has never been so organised, and I joined the gym. My older children seem calmer too as I guess the whole vibe has changed.