Worried about dd & dsil weight

I thought the OP meant her own daughter, her own daughter’s female partner and the OP’s daughter and partner’s daughter who is a child.

Offer to buy them Mounjaro if you can afford it @Feelinhothothott

It’s not healthy but it can be used while cutting down the calories as it fills you up while only being negligible in calories itself.

she means her DD and her DDs partner. d son in law.

Do you mean your DD and your SIL? Or her child? Or DBro instead of DD? Seems confusing.

What was your DD’s weight and diet like when she was living with you? I really don’t know what you can do here. My husband’s sister is morbidly obese and has become so in the last ten years after being slim most of her life. It is worrying. My dh does try and talk to her about it occasionally but it’s really difficult. He has said to me that if she was a drug addict or an alcoholic he wouldn’t just stand back and do nothing.

All I can think of is suggesting that you do more active things when you meet up.

When girls get into their teens many of them do seem to drop out of sports so I suppose that’s a time when you could intervene if the dd does lose her interest in sports. Suggest different things that she might like to try. Athletics is good for teenagers for example.

It has thrown me a bit being with dp as both his children are obese, and when I met him I think his daughter and her partner were morbidly obese - both in fact look a good bit healthier now and have got more active, but I don’t think the underlying issue has changed. I’m fairly terrified that ds will go the same way at some point, because we live in an obesogenic environment. The fact is that you just have to try and let go of it. I used to watch my late husband’s mother offering her own obese daughter low fat ice cream or some dreadful shit at family dinners, and cutting out healthy diet planners from the newspaper for her and cringe, because all it did was ruin their relationship and embarrass her. Keep the relationship in as good a state as you can manage and hope against hope that they decide at some point to look after their health. Maybe save for your granddaughter too, because you’re not wrong that there’s a high chance they’ll have shorter lives.

Because it’s not healthy on top of the weight and crappy food.

Diet Coke has virtually zero calories, so it's not clear why you mentioned it.

You can't so don't even try. I've seen it, time and time again, going through it myself with family members and used to be obese. There is nothing you can say, at all, that is going to help.