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Original poster

AIBU to worry my daughter is picking up too much slang?

97 replies

DeBore · 26/05/2026 22:56

DS16 has gone to the local grammar for sixth form rather than staying private and we’ve noticed she’s picked up rather a lot of slang. Whenever she’s on the phone to her friends her whole way of speaking changes - the wide vocabulary we’ve given her just disappears and it’s all “like”, “literally” and “innit” 🙄
We don’t want to control who she’s friends with of course, but would it be nice if she at least spends some time with girls who speak well. Speaking properly opens so many more opportunities,more hireable in good jobs, higher positions later in life. You know what teenagers sound like nowadays… it’s rather grating.

OP posts:
FrenchandSaunders · 27/05/2026 12:02

You sound like my mum ... sent me to a posh convent. Was horrified when I married a south london plumber. She'd much rather I'd have been unhappily married to a banker with a nice accent.

Cobrakainerd · 27/05/2026 12:00

My eldest went to full on Essex Estuary. He had been prep/senior independent in southern counties. Its irritating but they do grow out of it.

Tonty · 27/05/2026 11:59

Standards!Standards!

redskyAtNigh · 27/05/2026 11:58

Gkdx · 27/05/2026 11:48

I didn't let my children ever say innit

You mean you didn't let your children say "innit" when they were with you?

redskyAtNigh · 27/05/2026 11:57

My DC only go to the local comp so their communication is solely via grunts and 2 and 3 letter incomprehensible text messages.

Trinity65 · 27/05/2026 11:57

DoAWheelie · 27/05/2026 03:14

Read up about code switching. It's a very useful skill in life to be able to seamlessly "fit in" with whoever is around you and will be a valuable asset in many jobs that are client facing.

Edited

I do this. Adapt language and speech to whatever company I'm in
YABU Op

OwlBeThere · 27/05/2026 11:53

I teach university students in linguistics at one of the top rated universities for the subject in the country. I also speak with a regional accent and when I’m speaking to my friends and family chuck in copious ‘innits’ and ‘likes’ and even say ‘mun’ a lot like the Welsh woman I am. Chill out, like.

Trinity65 · 27/05/2026 11:50

VerityUnreasonble · 26/05/2026 23:03

People are generally quite capable of modulating their vocabulary to the situation. I'm sure she can still use all the big words what she learnt if required, in a job interview for example.

This,,

coulditbeme2323 · 27/05/2026 11:49

Gkdx · 27/05/2026 11:48

I didn't let my children ever say innit

Agree.

Gkdx · 27/05/2026 11:48

I didn't let my children ever say innit

ThejoyofNC · 27/05/2026 11:47

How awful. Next thing you know she'll be pronouncing her last name as "bucket". Get her away from the riff raff OP, before she's lost forever.

ShowOfHands · 27/05/2026 11:47

Well if you will let her mix with the proles...

Ifailed · 27/05/2026 11:45

Tigerbalmshark · 27/05/2026 09:51

I’m amazed it has taken her until age 16 to start code switching.

The boys of Dulwich College sound like they are auditioning for Attack the Block on their way home (my train goes through the local station). I am sure they sound like Boris Johnson in class and in front of their parents.

Nigel Farage went to Dulwich College and he sounds like a cunt.

IamnotSethRogan · 27/05/2026 11:43

I'd say it's more to do with her age than hanging out with the commoners at grammar school. You'd probably find all the much better private school children are speaking the same.

Stelladid · 27/05/2026 11:39

I wouldn’t worry at all. My youngest daughter (now aged 44) was terrible for this as a teenager. It didn’t last long when she went to Uni to study law. Now she lives in Ascot, I don’t recognise her way of speaking, but that’s because she’s leaned into ‘posh’!

BillieWiper · 27/05/2026 11:39

I wouldn't call the word 'like' slang. And I've heard really uber posh people peppering their sentences with it. So it's not because she's now at this grammar school where she's now mixing with yobbos?!

You do sound a bit snobby I'm afraid. Have you not thought that she would speak differently to her friends than she would in a job interview or professionally? Does she have a job?

coulditbeme2323 · 27/05/2026 11:38

I actually don't think you are being unreasonable, but at least you don't have a middle class white lad who says "fam" or "pagans"

Ramsinator · 27/05/2026 11:38

Are “like” and “literally” really slang words?

SmashThePatriarchy · 27/05/2026 11:35

Oh no, Tabitha is mixing with the local riff raff. Off with their heads!

Crunchymum · 27/05/2026 11:33

You should have kept her in private education, innit?

Withthe2Ls · 27/05/2026 11:28

DeBore · 26/05/2026 22:56

DS16 has gone to the local grammar for sixth form rather than staying private and we’ve noticed she’s picked up rather a lot of slang. Whenever she’s on the phone to her friends her whole way of speaking changes - the wide vocabulary we’ve given her just disappears and it’s all “like”, “literally” and “innit” 🙄
We don’t want to control who she’s friends with of course, but would it be nice if she at least spends some time with girls who speak well. Speaking properly opens so many more opportunities,more hireable in good jobs, higher positions later in life. You know what teenagers sound like nowadays… it’s rather grating.

“Speaking properly opens so many more opportunities,more hireable in good jobs, higher positions later in life”

Your daughter is clearly being raised by a classist idiot. Thankfully she doesn’t seem affected by it.

sunshinestar1986 · 27/05/2026 11:22

🤣
If people can switch between languages
They can surely switch between formal and slang in the same language, she hasn't 'forgotten' how to speak nice...

Bushmillsbabe · 27/05/2026 10:50

You adapt your language to those around you, so unless she is talking to you/grandparents etc in the same way, it shows she is smart enough to adjust her commuinication, it's a positive.

She is now surrounded by a group of smart girls from a variety of backgrounds who have earned their school place through hard work and intelligence, rather than the small section of society where parents buy their school place. In many way gramnar pupils are a 'cut above' private, if you want to be snobbish about it.

Mixing with a wider variety of people, where the ethos is based on hard work and achievement can only be a positive for her.

DollydaydreamTheThird · 27/05/2026 10:39

Is this a joke post?? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Beamur · 27/05/2026 10:37

Your daughter is smart.
Language is adaptive and young people deliberately have a lexicon designed to exclude their parents from knowing everything they're doing and talking about.
It's a normal and pretty healthy thing.