AIBU to think a twin parent should contribute per child?

Exactly. We had twins at my eldest old school and the mum was always complaining about trips because “we’ve got to pay twice as much!” (again, someone on a very nice wage, arent they aways these cfs)

I felt like asking her if she understood that both children would in fact be going on the trip and therefore both experiencing it, taking a seat on the bus, getting the education etc. That’s why you’ve got to pay for both of them you see.

I have three children. I don’t pay for a trip and then the next year when my younger one goes say ‘oh no I’ve already paid for that’.

And yes I do understand that it’s two payments together rather than a year apart so a bigger % of your monthly wage but you KNOW you have twins!! This isn’t a surprise to you, they’ve been the same age their whole lives and they will continue to be! Start a little petty cash fund for trips/birthday parties, whatever. This is an eventuality you can literally plan for.

It's just a communal pot. People can put what they want in it. If she wants to put in £10, she can. What does it matter if you spend £290 or £300 or even £150 on a present for the teacher? It's going to be a big present.

Honestly! I feel like people have too much time on their hands sometimes 🤪

@TheMumEdit
actually statistics and research has shown that it is more expensive to have twins than it is singletons no matter how close in age your singletons are

I'm a mum of twins. I saw gifts as really being from the parents rather than the child so have to confess I paid one contribution. Never occurred to me that anyone would think badly of me. I would have expected my parent friends to have been able to raise it with me as an adult if it was an issue.

Yes! 2 world’s best teacher mugs are always better than 1! There’s a real shortage of them in staffrooms across the country. 😂

This

honestly what a performance and nasty gossiping about who paid what.

We're not allowed to accept gifts in my role in local government. Makes it easier.

Yabu. School collections are optional or do you hunt every parent down for the payment.
It is more than enough.

Donation should be worded ‘per family’ not ‘per child’. Paying double for twins who have the same teacher seems insane, is a twin parent going solo expected to buy 2 box’s of chocolates or 2 mugs lol

Twin mum here, personally never been keen on a ‘group’ collection for this very reason, someone’s always picked apart by what they do or don’t donate… donate being the key element here! In relation to one of your responses about the kids names being on the cards, what a parent didn’t donate because they couldn’t? Are you removing that child’s name? All seems very petty. If you chose to do this in future years my advice would be any donation is welcome rather than dictating amounts to people. Parents with multiple children at one school can end up paying out a fair amount with children in different classes! Regardless of twins etc

Twin mom here - I would pay per child

I agree it should be per child.

However, collecting for a present isn't usually a set amount. It's a collection so people contribute what they wish.

Bizarre isn’t it.
If you attend a family party with two kids you don’t give a present from each. You give a gift from the family.

So why do people think twin parents should be turning up with two presents? Surely you care about your kids friends turning up rather than how many presents they’re going to get?!

You didn't grow them both at the same time though, did you. And I bet you managed to pass on a few baby grows, or maybe the cot or bouncy chair. And 18 months old doesn't need the same stuff as a newborn. You literally need two of everything at the same time.

The mum in your OP is wrong, she should give £10 per child (I have twins and I do -- they both got taught and it's a hard job!). But I lost all respect for you with this. Two under two is NOT the same as twins. Just nope.

I have twins and I would pay £10.

It’s one teacher. Everyone parent putting in £10 for the teacher, not £10 per child for the teacher. Why would a twin parent pay double for one teacher if she teaches them both?

Teachers don’t get paid per-head taught so why do you feel gifts should be?

Our primary school was quite big with lots of TAs and other staff, so our teacher collection was used for gifts for them too. It was interesting having a child in 2 different classes as one class always collected quite a bit more than the other. But it was also nice that noone ever expected parents to contribute and every child's name was included in the card irrespective of whether the parent had contributed, or done their own thing.

Op I think that the teacher will be happy with the gift yes when you have dc in separate classes it’s per teacher these twins have the same teacher so 10 should be ok if I had twins I don’t think it would cross my mind to pay twice it’s just 1 teacher per class. If 2 teachers were doing a job share it might be different then. But your making it a bigger issue than it needs to be if she was a single mom going the food bank with twins would you expect 20?

Teachers shouldn't accept cash or high value gifts. Other public servants can't and it is not ethical.

This. FFS, have you nothing else to do?

I have collections for years for teachers. One donation per family is completely fine.

Our cards always are signed 'from the children and families of 4HT' not a named list of who donated with respect to those who cannot afford or more likely in our school, the kids of parents who forget to do it in time.

Anyway shouldn't the £10 have gone up with inflation in 6 years 😃

We don’t set a fixed amount and just run a collection on something like collectiv. Only the person running it can see who’s given what. Some give £5 and some £20 but it stops anyone being embarrassed if they can’t afford a set amount.

Parents of twins have to be thick skinned. Just for the balance maybe we should point out we didn’t get double maternity leave. It is not the same as having singletons.

Your gift is goingbto technically create a tax lisbility for the teacher.

You don't know her financial circumstances now. There are plenty of people who appear financially well off but have a huge mortgage or debts. £10 per family is more than enough/too much. Chances are the staff are going against policies accepting gifts of that value anyway. A personal gift with thought from a child means much more.
YABU