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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My manager has banned all vests, skirts and shorts

762 replies

itsjustthepricewepay · 26/05/2026 13:32

I could cry right now.

I understand banning thin strapped vests but surely thick straps are fine? She’s also banned all shorts (including knee length) and skirts that sit at the knee. Basically we have to go down to ankle length trousers.

AIBU to genuinely consider quitting my job? Her office is air conditioned but we’re in a horrible hot sun trap!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
18
MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 27/05/2026 15:30

Livpool · 26/05/2026 16:01

I know! Do they faint at the sight of an ankle?!

Only if the ankle is shoe free!

Laurmolonlabe · 27/05/2026 15:05

To be cool you want lightweight loose clothing,not short clothing.

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 27/05/2026 14:21

itsjustthepricewepay · 26/05/2026 13:45

I’m nhs too.

Ok.

So you're not public facing but others in your organisation are.

Presumably they have dress code restrictions.

Do you think it's fair if they are restricted and you are not?

Are you in a mixed-sex environment?

Presumably the men aren't allowed in wearing vests and shorts.

Do you think its fair that they have restrictions that you do not?

If you dont like the job - leave.
If you dont like the job in the current heatwave - take some days off

You seem to think the rules could be relaxed and you'd still look professional and elegant. Can you be sure about the others in your environment?

SleeplessInWherever · 27/05/2026 12:49

YourShyLion · 27/05/2026 12:43

No that's not on. It's ugly but apart from that it's not professional and noone wants armpits flapping around in offices 🤢

It’s ugly.. what a bitchy unnecessary comment.

Nobody is making you wear it, and she didn’t ask for your fashion advice. She asked how to keep cool in a hot office.

YourShyLion · 27/05/2026 12:43

itsjustthepricewepay · 26/05/2026 13:58

This is the vest. I’d say it’s appropriate.

No that's not on. It's ugly but apart from that it's not professional and noone wants armpits flapping around in offices 🤢

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 27/05/2026 12:38

ScupperedbytheSea · 27/05/2026 10:28

To all the posters suggesting wearing 'nice airy maxi dresses' etc. You do realise that not all women want to dress like that?

I barely own any dresses, and not of that type. They're not me, and I'm not going to start wearing them to appease someone's idea of appropriate. We don't all aspire to look like respectable Tory wives from Tunbridge Wells.

Unless there is a clear uniform provision, I'll want to wear whatever of my own clothes, of my own style, that allow me to feel comfortable in hot weather.

And yes, that includes vests in the office. I'm mid 40s, perimenopausal and run hot, and I'm much happier if my clean, deodorised armpits are allowed to air, rather than soaking into underarm material of any sort.

And I work in a corporate environment where, shock horror, men and women can wear shorts/tshirts/vests, and some women above knee skirts too.

In order to stop policing women's bodies we need to actually stop policing women's bodies.

Just because you don’t like dresses/maxi dresses, @ScupperedbytheSea, doesn’t stop them being a sensible option to suggest - among other suggestions, of course. I don’t like sleeveless tops/dresses because my upper arms are not fit for public view - but that doesn’t stop vest tops/sleeveless tops or dresses being a valid option. I’m sure a vest top can be smart enough for office wear, and I absolutely agree with you that you deserve to be comfortable at work.

cinquanta · 27/05/2026 12:21

Popsnafflerock · 27/05/2026 11:22

Bur even the men’s clothes is kind of loose long and covering most of their skin.

To protect their skin from the sun outside. Irrelevant indoors.

cinquanta · 27/05/2026 12:16

BIossomtoes · 27/05/2026 10:35

We don't all aspire to look like respectable Tory wives from Tunbridge Wells.

I couldn’t look less like one! Dresses that allow the air to circulate are way cooler than bare skin. Look at how they dress in the Middle East.

They dress like that in the Middle East to keep the sun off their skin and because, in many places, society expects women (and men) to cover up.

If you stay out of direct sunlight, anything that restricts air movement over skin, including loose fitting clothes, will reduce the amount your skin can cool.

Popsnafflerock · 27/05/2026 11:22

Fizbosshoes · 27/05/2026 11:19

Im not sure that women's dress codes in some middle Eastern countries is all designed to keep them cool....

Bur even the men’s clothes is kind of loose long and covering most of their skin.

Fizbosshoes · 27/05/2026 11:19

BIossomtoes · 27/05/2026 10:35

We don't all aspire to look like respectable Tory wives from Tunbridge Wells.

I couldn’t look less like one! Dresses that allow the air to circulate are way cooler than bare skin. Look at how they dress in the Middle East.

Im not sure that women's dress codes in some middle Eastern countries is all designed to keep them cool....

BIossomtoes · 27/05/2026 10:35

We don't all aspire to look like respectable Tory wives from Tunbridge Wells.

I couldn’t look less like one! Dresses that allow the air to circulate are way cooler than bare skin. Look at how they dress in the Middle East.

Popsnafflerock · 27/05/2026 10:30

Completely agree @ScupperedbytheSea and I am someone who LOVES a maxi dress! I totally appreciate its not for everyone.

ScupperedbytheSea · 27/05/2026 10:28

To all the posters suggesting wearing 'nice airy maxi dresses' etc. You do realise that not all women want to dress like that?

I barely own any dresses, and not of that type. They're not me, and I'm not going to start wearing them to appease someone's idea of appropriate. We don't all aspire to look like respectable Tory wives from Tunbridge Wells.

Unless there is a clear uniform provision, I'll want to wear whatever of my own clothes, of my own style, that allow me to feel comfortable in hot weather.

And yes, that includes vests in the office. I'm mid 40s, perimenopausal and run hot, and I'm much happier if my clean, deodorised armpits are allowed to air, rather than soaking into underarm material of any sort.

And I work in a corporate environment where, shock horror, men and women can wear shorts/tshirts/vests, and some women above knee skirts too.

In order to stop policing women's bodies we need to actually stop policing women's bodies.

FelicityShagsWell · 27/05/2026 10:26

Greenandyellowday · 26/05/2026 23:25

Seriously?

One of my colleagues comes in every day in shorts and t-shirt with no bra. She's mid 60s and has huge boobs. She's also a senior lecturer. She wears Merrells on her feet, sandals in the summer. Nobody has ever told her to go home and get changed. In the winter the shorts are swapped for joggers. She's been here since 1989.

BIossomtoes · 27/05/2026 10:15

FelicityShagsWell · 27/05/2026 10:12

I thought the line manager said only maxi length or midi are acceptable? Imagine going to work trussed up like a 1970s Laura Ashley model. Or Julie Christie in The Go Between.

Edited

My midi that I’m wearing today is like a parachute. I’d be far more trussed up in shorts and a vest top.

FelicityShagsWell · 27/05/2026 10:12

Candy24 · 27/05/2026 00:14

Honestly the shirt and short pictures you have posted are not appropriate for work. I wouldn't be comfortable wearing that to work. I personally think that you could find some really nice dresses in cool material that will breathe and are also dressy enough for work.

I thought the line manager said only maxi length or midi are acceptable? Imagine going to work trussed up like a 1970s Laura Ashley model. Or Julie Christie in The Go Between.

NewGirlInTown · 27/05/2026 09:05

Policing women’s bodies as ever.
Some people won’t be happy until we are all in burkas.
OP, wear what keeps you cool and go above her head to complain about her attitude.
Nice of her to sit in aircon while trying to make others more uncomfortable.

Lifelover16 · 27/05/2026 08:18

Solaitt · 26/05/2026 22:54

Make your mind up.

You couldn’t care less but you said:

I wouldn’t want to be working with a man wearing a vest exposing his hairy chest and bushy armpits in my vicinity!

So which is it? If you don’t like the look of body hair in your vicinity then you obviously do care.

Do you have no understanding of context?

You would expect to see body parts and hair in a medical environment, or on a beach, in a gym or at a pool for example.
I don’t want to see my dentist, lawyer, GP, or office colleague of either sex in a revealing top and shorts displaying armpit hair, leg hair or a hairy chest, and certainly not a manspreader (or womanspreader) in shorts in an office environment.

BiteSizedLife · 27/05/2026 07:03

itsjustthepricewepay · 26/05/2026 17:07

The one where I posted the vest and that poster proceeded to be incredibly rude to me? To the point other posters called them out too?

I don't see anything about that particular screen shot of interaction/quote history that I included that was overly rude.

It IS that interaction and exchange over three messages that suggested you did wear the shorts to work though. Of course you later clarified in the thread that you do not wear those shorts to work.

HarshbutTrue2 · 27/05/2026 06:55

Next have some very pretty cap sleeved tops which are suitable for work.
If op can sew, she can easily run up a long or mid calf cotton skirt. I love floaty skirts in the summer. Full length tiered skirts are a summer staple. I made several over the years.
Personally, I like to try and look presentable as well as be comfortable.

LBFseBrom · 27/05/2026 06:37

There's nothing wrong with sleeveless clothes but vest tops and shorts for work are a step further than that.

Popsnafflerock · 27/05/2026 05:17

BauhausOfEliott · 26/05/2026 14:16

Some ludicrous responses on this thread.

It astonishes me how many Mumsnetters have astonishingly outdated views about what is 'appropriate' and 'professional' in the average office.

In most offices, nobody gives a flying fuck if they see a woman's shoulders. I'm 50 and in my 28 years of working in offices, I've never worked anywhere that banned sleeveless tops. Even in my first job, which was the most formal place I've ever worked, we wore sleeveless tops and had bare legs with skirts in summer. My colleagues and I wore tailored 'city shorts' to the office when they were fashionable about 20 years ago without so much as a raised eyebrow.

It also stuns me how many Mumsnetters seem to think that just because they're repulsed by the mere hint of a bare human limb, that somehow means everyone has to dress like they're extras in The Handmaid's Tale to spare them their physical nausea at the sight of an armpit or something.

OP, your boss is a complete arsehole.

Yeah I have worked for both Scottish gov and UK gov in positions working closely with cabinet ministers and no one said a word about people wearing sleeveless tops in the office.

Popsnafflerock · 27/05/2026 05:11

WhatAMarvelousTune · 26/05/2026 13:51

Something that is basically a “t shirt with the sleeves cut off” is not inappropriate for workwear.

I saw my GP last week and she was wearing something similar to this. The idea that it’s inappropriate is weird. It’s totally fine.

Exactly. I find this strange and as others have said OP needs to questions with HR, its nhs not someone’s private company where YThey can impose rules on a whim.

I am someone who dresses rather warm for the weather lol people always say aren’t you hot dressed like that?

I have only left the house one day this week and I was wearing a sleeveless maxi dress with a light jacket covering my sleeves despite it being 26 degrees! But even someone like would never think to impose such rules on a workplace. Especially one that isn’t customer facing.

Just let people be! I had a friend and former coworker that used to wear smart knee length shorts during the hot london summer and it looked great.

HollyBerri · 27/05/2026 04:22

You need to speak to your union rep. If its NHS is your manager even allowed to dictate dress codes. Surely you have wider policies on this?

Yetone · 27/05/2026 03:46

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 26/05/2026 18:26

I think people are being pretty unfair about @itsjustthepricewepay‘s home made top - working with cotton jersey fabric is really not easy - I am a reasonable needle woman and I wouldn't try to make a top like that. And the colour may simply not be reproducing very well in the photo.

I agree about cotton jersey not being an easy fabric to sew with. I use an overlocker and cover stitch machine for sewing stretch fabrics.

I think longish loose cotton fabrics are best for working in the heat.

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