AIBU to stop therapy after learning my therapist’s husband is Reform?

Ask yourself this OP?
Would a Reform voter chose to pay for services provided by your immigrant partner?
Not likely.

This.

You do realise a therapist isn't a shining example of humanity. It's just someone who's passed a course and seems sympathetic/ is a good listener.
Inside they couldn't give a shit, are planning what to do at the weekend. Politics are the least of your priorities.

Some of my fave people on earth are Republicans. Decent people, but their world view and mine are seismically different. While this means I could be the best of friends with them despite our deep political differences, I would not have them as my therapist. I’d switch! (Ps I’m UK by the way, just a helpful analogy perhaps; ps agree with you on the Reform front).

A wife can have entirely different political views to her husband it isnt the dark ages,

Yes, I can read very well thanks. That doesn’t necessarily mean I agree with what I’m reading. OP has lost trust in their therapist simply because they don’t agree with the politics of their spouse. Nothing whatever to with the standard of care they are receiving. Once we start down this road, where does it end ?

You can't unknow this about her so it will always cloud your relationship now. So, yes, I think you need to find another therapist.

I guarantee the majority of the ones voting yabu are reformers.

I'd mention it at your next session and see their reaction, then you'll gauge whether they're also a racist bigot.

I would find this very hard to be with. I’d suggest talking to your therapist about it before you make any decisions. For all you know she might be in the process of leaving him. But if I thought my therapist held these views, I couldn’t stay with them.

The Reform position is not “we hate green energy”. It is that the current net zero timetable is economically damaging and practically unrealistic.

The UK has extremely high energy costs, especially for industry, almost the highest on the planet. We also contribute less than 1% of global emissions. So the argument is not “do nothing”, it is “stop making ourselves poorer while barely moving the global dial”.

You can disagree with that, but it is a serious position. Use the resources we have, stop taxing industry to death, build proper infrastructure, use oil and gas while we still need them, invest in nuclear, including small modular reactors, and yes, use solar and other renewables where they actually work.

Net zero as an aim is admirable. Net zero before the infrastructure exists, while households and businesses are already under huge pressure, is not a plan. It is just expensive wishful thinking.

YANBU. Vote with your wallet. It will bring you more peace of mind.

Or she’s one of those who thinks she’s one o the Good Immigrants.

…….I may or may not have immigrant relatives that support Le Pen. All it took was a few decades for them to forget the bidonvilles.

💯

I was going to write the exact same comment

Can you read? This has already been explained by multiple posters. The therapeutic relationship depends on trust and people feeling comfortable with their therapist. If they no longer feel comfortable or have lost trust, then that will obviously impact on the therapy.

Batshit. Especially if this was NHS provided therapy, given how hard it is to access in the first place. If you’re happy with your treatment and are responding to it, what on earth does the therapists’ partners’ politics have to do with anything ?

Yes. People vote for parties that speak to their values and beliefs. Reform voters are not children. They are making decisions based on what Reform offers, which they like.

Well all the arguments I see for it - 'they're not our kind of people, they're a danger to our women and girls, they're sexual predators, our cultures are incompatible, we can't afford to keep them, they aren't educated, they'll be a drain, they're criminals' etc etc were the same as I've just read in a book about the proposed abolition of slavery in Georgia, US.
We're entitled to our opinions, yours is that you're not racist, mine is that if you are using the same arguments as those who didn't want slaves to be set free, you are racist.

I hear his surname is Goebbels.

That is a lot of abuse in place of an argument.

Saying “people vote Reform because they feel ignored” is not gaslighting. It is a basic political observation. You do not have to like their reasons, but pretending millions of people are just racist fuckwits is lazy and self-satisfied.

You keep repeating “far right racist party” as if saying it often enough makes it true. It does not. We do not have a major far-right racist party in this country. Reform certainly is not that when judged by its actual policies and actions, rather than by the worst things people have heard about it second or third hand.

Wanting lower immigration, stronger borders, less net zero cost, or a different relationship with the EU is not the same thing as racism or fascism.

It also devalues the language we need for actual Nazis and actual political extremism. If every immigration sceptic is treated as a fascist, the word loses force when we really need it.

This kind of polarised debate is awful for nuance. It turns every disagreement into a moral emergency and makes honest discussion impossible. People are accountable for their votes, yes. But so are you for the way you talk about ordinary voters. If your response to their concerns is contempt, abuse and moral grandstanding, do not be surprised when they stop listening.

if you think it will stop you opening up to your therapist in some way or adversely impact your outcomes from therapy then yes you should move (and don’t feel bad for doing so). However I personally wouldn’t change because of this if the therapist was good and i was other happy with them. We all have to rub along with people we don’t have the same opinions as, and I think you may risk making life harder for yourself by attempting to mold your environment to your own ideal, rather than accepting differences and existing in the world as it is. Many, many people want lower immigration- even many immigrants! It doesn’t make them racist. Black and white thinking (excuse the pun) makes life harder than it has to be.

I agree.

I’d definitely leave. I also suggest checking who your dentist’s milkman votes for, just to be safe.

Yanbu to be troubled by this.i would discuss it with her before deciding anything though. See how she handles it.

You are still not separating evidence from inference.

The CPS link shows hate crime is up. It does not show that Reform caused it. It does not show that Farage caused it. It does not show a causal link between Reform policy and hate crime.

And again, the Sunderland comment was disgusting. No defence of it at all. But it was an individual’s vile social media comment, not Reform policy, not a manifesto pledge, and not something said in an official party capacity.

Every party has had members, candidates or councillors say awful, racist, stupid or offensive things. That does not automatically make those comments the policy of the party.

There is a perfectly fair argument to be had about Reform, immigration, language and tone. But calling them a “far-right group” and treating every horrible comment by an associated person as party policy is not evidence. It is guilt by association.

Criticise what they actually propose. Do not just fill in the gaps with the worst possible assumptions. Then you will get further in bringing people around.