Would you judge self harm scars?

I shared because I still did them because someone else was doing them.

I still have the scars.

I still get treated the same horrible way and receive the same comments or get looked at with pity.

Why I did it doesn’t take away from the treatment I get for it.

I would think that I hope they’re in a better place now mentally and they’re not struggling anymore. And I’d feel happy for them that they didn’t feel the need to cover up in this heat and instead they wore sensible and comfortable clothes for the weather.

Mental Health issues are a form of disability and also a fact of life.

Not your tone, your words. Clearly it was caused by your total lack of reading comprehension.

@ToKittyornottoKittyOh so it was tone policing rather than making a point of any substance. got it!

Your comment being deleted for being vile says all that needs to be said. And I wasn’t even commenting on your opinion on whether the two are comparable or not, I was commenting on your disgusting and inaccurate description of self harm.

Well I think it is vile and uneducated to compare conversations about people with disabilities to conversations about self harm. Disabilities are a fact of life and are not disturbing in the same way that wilful self injury is. If you cannot comprehend the difference then perhaps you need to educate yourself about both topics.

I wouldn't judge at all. My daughter has a lot on her thighs and people stare on holiday but thats up to them only we know what she went through and at the end of the day she is here and well and that's all that matters.

I would think- that poor person has had some trauma. But they are obviously strong and got over it. I’m happy they seem to be in a good place now. In the past I have asked people about their scars, because I’m genuinely interested in people’s stories. I’m respectful if they don’t want to talk about it, but I haven’t had that experience yet. Xxx

How would you glean all that from seeing someone’s scars? I’m all for not judging, but I also wouldn’t make up a heroic story, because I simply wouldn’t know the details.

Vile and uneducated way of putting it. Try educating yourself before speaking to your kids about it.

My lovely boss has self harm scars and to me I have always admired how she has done so well in life considering how she's must have felt back then. My DD has scars that she tries to cover with tattoos. I wish she didn't.

According to the NHS:
"Self-harm is most often described as a way to express or cope with emotional distress."

Unlike you, I suffered a number of traumatic events when young. I didn't self-harm, I used other coping mechanisms at the time, none of them healthy. So when I see self-harm scars that makes me immediately empathetic towards that person. It doesn't make me judge them in a negative way or view them as a 'victim.'

Sadly people will judge. I have a long scar from an accident as a teenager on my right arm, and people definitely stare and comment. So I wear long sleeves when out. Linen shirts are my friends in the summer.

I have a large burn scar on one arm. I find that some children stare noticeably but adults ignore it. I have only been asked questions in a medical setting.

I would assume you were abused in some way as a child if I’m honest, and I would feel sympathy for you for that. I wouldn’t mind about my kids seeing the scars but I would be annoyed if you told them that they were self harm. If my kids asked I would say you must have been in an accident as a child.

I wouldn't bat an eyelid but I'm used to SH scars as plenty of people I know have them and my arm and leg are covered. I've tattooed over the worst ones but they're still visible. I don't hide them and happily wear short sleeves when it's hot. I just can't be arsed to cover them up anymore. Sometimes people look but I don't think everyone's actually ever said anything.

I now have cats so have lots of cat scars on my arms anyway so I just say my cats are feisty. Which they are. 😁 I would cover up fresh ones though but not sure why. Maybe it's almost as if I was inviting someone to mention them? I don't know.

I have them too OP and im in my 50s. I don't cover them, but I have them on my wrists too so even with a jumper sometimes they poke out. I notice people clocking them sometimes. I just mention it to get the 'elephant out of the room'. I just say something like, 'Oh that was from my very sad days'. People are always terribly sympathetic, as I would be with someone in the same situation.

Funnily enough I was just looking at mine this morning as I got a bit tanned yesterday and they are now way more pronounced. Ive given up caring. I do think people are a lot more understanding about these things than they used to be.

That's terribly sad, and not dissimilar to why I started - in my case, it was because a friend had done it, also when I was 14, and I thought it might 'help' me. That social contagion is something I have thought about before when it comes to my scars. It's not why I don't show them, as I just generally feel too uncomfortable - but if I did feel comfortable, I might still cover up. It's not like other injuries or disabilities, being self-inflicted.

(But I don't negatively judge people who don't cover up.)

I would judge - I would judge that you’ve faced an awful lot of pain and come of the other side. I would judge that you were an amazing individual with more strength than most people could dream of.
You are clearly an amazing person to come through this and you should feel very proud.

No you don’t understand where I’m coming from. You did it for fun. I did it because I was in deep emotional turmoil. The two are not the same.

I won’t be interacting with you or anyone else on this thread again.

Have a pleasant day.

There’s a difference between people looking/noticing and judging. I’d notice, but I wouldn’t think bad of you at all.