MIL let DD aged 5 get sunburned but DH thinks we should just be grateful she had her and gave her a nice time.

Even if she did top it up it would have come off in the pool and it's not enough for the mid day sun especially if it's on parts not normally exposed like torso. This is really serious and DH needs to come up with a plan to communicate this. She shouldn't have been in the sun that much, not during the 11-3 period, the paddling pool should have been shaded and certainly not in just her pants. She should have been in a t shirt as well.

Why is everyone hung up on sending rash vests, etc Why would they do that for a walk? The paddling pool WASNT the plan

Put the aftersun cream in the fridge its really really soothing make your wimpy husband deal with the night time tears maybe next time he will think of his daughter rather than mummy's feelings

This

This

Hat, long sleeved and short legged sun suit. Make sure you apply f50 waterproof cream when you arrive at MIL’s or if MIL collects her before they leave. Sunburn is cruel and very painful. Water reflecting the sun makes it much easier to burn. Don’t message MIL as she clearly thought DD was having a great time. Just tell her next time DD goes.

I feel like you just tell her next time that she should really re-apply sunscreen cause she got burned the last time.

On this situation dh would deal with it as I’m lick a bull in a china shop so he would be “forced” to say something or I definitely would..

i would probably get him to message asking what suncream dd was topped up with as she has burnt patches over her body from the sun and you want to know which suncream didn’t do its job properly so you don’t use it again.

this way she knows dd has been burnt and she didn’t do her job properly but you aren’t directly saying she did a shit job, I also wouldn’t leave dd alone with her again.

There's a nicer way to bring this up.
Saying "reminder" sounds like she is a member of staff. I wouldn't use that word.

thank you so much, she had a great time. I just need to let you know that she got sunburnt today, though. We need to figure out how to make sure she doesn't get so sunburnt next time.

... would sound more collaborative than dictatorial.

FFS!
You pay the price for sunburn later in life, like 20 years down the road.

I actually DON'T think it's passive-aggressive to send a pic with the accompanying text - your message is polite, grateful & completely explanatory. Nothing wrong with pointing out the consequences - personally, I WOULDN'T be offended to receive such a message. You're protecting your daughter & rightly so.

Get a sleeved rash vest and long swim shorts that are SPF50 for all future sunny paddling pool days

I think it depends. My MIL wouldn't have bothered reapplying it at all. My Mum would have been grabbing every hour and slathering it on while my Dad was saying to just let them go brown 😂🤦‍♀️. I used to get burnt sometimes because you need to put it on thick enough/wait to go into the sun or water/apply it regularly etc. and also in those days Factor 15 just gave you fifteen times longer so if the burn time was five minutes then an hour in the sun would see you burnt.

If your MIL tried her best then maybe be kind and give reminders. Obviously if she did what my MIL would have done then decidedly not.

(My Mum would probably have bought a cheap swimsuit too 😂).

My kids went to my parent’s today in rash vests and sun hats with 50+ protection, we sent the sunscreen but there are other things you could have done as a parent.

This is v dramatic. My sons face got burnt today and I applied cream at least 5 times. I wouldn’t dream of sending my MIL a text like that, presumably your relationship is otherwise good as she looks after your child for you. Just remind her next time in a nice way.

So your parents still don’t use sunscreen on themselves?

Because any adult that uses it would definitely know a child should.

She'll be fine - we all get a bit of sunburn at some stage.

I’m not saying it didn’t exist I’m saying it never even crossed MY parents mind. So I wouldn’t have expected them to think about with my own kids.

How do you know she didn’t top up the sun cream? I burnt as a kid and my mum smothered me in cream. Sometimes the sun is still strong. My oh burnt last year even when wearing factor 50! It’s so quickly done. Just smother her in after sun. Don’t send the pic of her burnt, but if mil asks did she have a good time I’d say yes, but she was quite burnt 😬

I know! Yesterday I saw a post where comments were excusing parents who left babies in their cars - actually forgot their own child and the child then died from heat. That's OK but accidentally sunburn on MIL's watch? Hang her 😅

i am 42 and have been wearing SPF since I was a child, back when factor 15 was high! I’m a redhead so my mum got used to slathering me in it, keeping me out the sun 11-3 and not letting me on school sports day which was a full day, no shade on the field and not allowed to go inside

It is also entirely possible to reapply all day and still get burned, especially when in the water. Talk to her about it, but don't send a photo.

You probably should say something so it doesn’t happen again BUT when my DD was 7 I did everything right and somehow she still got sunburnt in a similar situation.

Mid 40s

How old is your daughter? If she’s under 5 I would be very upset. If an older child, I would tell them to remind the grandparent about the suncream. Especially if your MIL was looking after many children on her own. You haven’t mentioned the age of your DD or how many grandchildren your MIL was looking after at the time.

How old are you?

Im in my 30’s and sun cream was definitely used a plently in my family. Rather looked like frosty the snow man at times I swear.

I remember in the 90’s on holidays seeing a metal stand of it at every shop aboard pretty much and at the seaside.