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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To see benefits as a safety net, not handouts?

411 replies

ForGreyStork · 23/05/2026 14:23

It’s the way benefits are talked about. To me, they’re part of a social security system -a safety net that people may need at different points in life, rather than “gifts” or handouts.
I also wonder whether increasing conditions and restrictions risk undermining that safety net over time.

AIBU?

OP posts:
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6
XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 17:03

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:54

We don't "know" any such thing.

I would argue that MH/ND is harder to have accommodation for in the workplace.
A ramp, adjusted desk and apps etc is easier to accommodate for.

How do you accommodate for someone with behavioural or mood issues?

lavenderscenteddrawerliners · 24/05/2026 17:02

millymollymoomoo · 23/05/2026 14:44

@inmyhair thats actually not the basic principle of the introduction of welfare state and should not be what benefits are for

they should be below minimum wage and short term. So working should always pay more. None of this choosing 16 hours and expecting state to top you up. None of the keep having children you can’t afford and expect more child benefits, housing eyc

total overhaul needed and back to basic principle of if you want something go work for it

Below NMW? So you want to push children of benefits recipients further into poverty? Let's bring back the workhouse, don't want these greedy children getting used to the "gifts".

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 17:01

FernFaery · 24/05/2026 16:35

But equally you’re using somebody in a wheelchair as an example, when we know the majority are MH/ND related.

So? What difference does that make?

XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 16:59

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:58

Then they need to negotiate a higher wage with their employers rather than relying on a blanket high NMW which actively dissuades employers from hiring at entry level in the first place.

Good luck doing that in the NHS.

Kirbert2 · 24/05/2026 16:58

XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 16:50

Well said. I also saw the posts about setting up a cleaning company. Just get some bleach from Home Bargains and pop an ad on FB... and that is what they said too 😂 They also thought anyone would be raking it in within a week. Total bull.

DM has a cleaning company, and she now gets 80+ applicants when she puts a vacancy out... and this could be for just a few hours a week. Not FT work. She has plenty of applications from graduates. People are desperate and are just going for anything.
And because she had the pick of the bunch, she interviews people with a lot of cleaning experience, and not graduates due to them being a flight risk.

I've also lost count of how many times I've been told to just hire a professional carer for my disabled son so I can work. A person even helpfully told me just the other day how wonderful it would be because it would mean someone else gaining employment too.

Absolutely clueless.

XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 16:58

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:43

I live rurally thanks. NMW should be just high enough to pay for the absolute necessities, same as benefits. And that does not include a car. Some people do of course need a car for their job but that is between them and their employer, not something that should factor in when setting minimum wage.

Where does it say that NMW should just be for the essentials?
I must have missed the memo on that.

NMW used to be enough to live on. A PP mentioned that they could afford to live alone, have a car, and a social life too.
I was the same. NMW job, could afford to live in a flat with a garden, I did not need a car but I could have afforded one. Plenty of money for a social life and hobbies too.
My monthly electricity bill now, is what I used to pay quarterly back then (16 years ago). The cost of living has gone up.

The jobs people on NMW do are very often essential, and you could argue they are more essential than some better paid jobs. Who is more essential? A carer, or some 'scrum' master type non-job role?
Why then, are people on NMW in those vital jobs just expected to not have anything apart from the bare essentials for living? And why are people putting up with this viewpoint?

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:58

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:51

Lots of people live in rural areas with little or no public transport. Walking or cycling to work isn't an option if your work is, say, 30 miles away or requires travel throughout the day (for example many carer roles only accept drivers with their own car).

Then they need to negotiate a higher wage with their employers rather than relying on a blanket high NMW which actively dissuades employers from hiring at entry level in the first place.

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:55

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:49

Keeping NMW artificially high is what keeps people out of the jobs market, because as soon as you make it uneconomic to hire people, rather than say invest in automation, or move your production overseas, then guess which route employers take? Life on NMW should be hard, it’s what makes people to strive for better.

Oh, a fetishist.

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:54

FernFaery · 24/05/2026 16:35

But equally you’re using somebody in a wheelchair as an example, when we know the majority are MH/ND related.

We don't "know" any such thing.

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:52

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 15:47

Do you honestly not realise that some people don't live on a bus route? (Or even a train route, come to that.) If they work too far away to walk or cycle, what are they supposed to do? And a lot of people fall into this category.

And what about people in jobs such as care work, who often have large areas to cover and who aren't given enough travel time between appointments to walk, cycle or bus it? Similarly cleaners who have equipment to lug between cleans? Mobile hairdressers? Gardeners/handymen?

Sounds like you've led a sheltered life, or lived in a town or city all your life, or both. For very many people a car is indeed a necessity.

I should have RTFT!

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:51

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 15:09

You think that NMW should be enough to run a car in addition to paying for the basics? That’s bonkers. A car is not a necessity like housing and food. People who can’t afford one (and many who can) get the bus, walk or cycle.

Lots of people live in rural areas with little or no public transport. Walking or cycling to work isn't an option if your work is, say, 30 miles away or requires travel throughout the day (for example many carer roles only accept drivers with their own car).

XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 16:50

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 16:32

I totally agree with most of these suggestions, but just wanted to point something out re people talking about what they can't do. Frequently they aren't being defeatist or making excuses, but are pointing out the genuine difficulties lots of people face, in the hope certain realities might start to percolate through to the hard of thinking (I don't mean you, I'm speaking generally about how these threads tend to go.)

No one is saying it's impossible for, say, disabled people to get a job, but there's a huge number of people on MN who seem extremely ignorant of the limitations some disabled people face. A lot of morons people post along the lines of 'But work will make you feel better! A few weeks of walking up three flights of stairs in an office with no wheelchair access, and you won't even need your wheelchair any more! You're just being negative! It's all a matter of mindset! You just don't want to work because you're rolling in it on PIP [!!] and get your nails done every Thursday!' OK, I've exaggerated somewhat there for dramatic effect, but you get my general point - it's important to challenge the more ignorant/clueless narratives, and in that context saying certain things aren't possible isn't negativity, it's realism.

Similarly when people are struggling to find work for genuine reasons, there's so much 'There are plenty of jobs, there must be because just the other day my local cafe was advertising for someone to clear the tables', 'They're not trying hard enough, otherwise they'd have found a job by now' (according to some recent figures many job seekers in the UK send out 50 to 100 applications before they finally strike it lucky, employers are receiving 20–50+ applications on average for each vacancy they advertise, and graduate roles can attract 140+ applicants each), 'In my day you went into every business in town with a CV until someone agreed to hire you', 'They can just retrain' (sometimes true, but takes time), and in one memorable example last weekend, 'Why don't they just set up a cleaning company, they'd be raking it in overnight and if anyone disagrees with me they're just not go-getting enough!'

The sheer ignorance and prejudice some people post on MN (again I don't mean you) needs challenging, and some so-called excuses are actually valid reasons. When people point that out, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are being negative or defeatist although I get how it could seem that way.

Well said. I also saw the posts about setting up a cleaning company. Just get some bleach from Home Bargains and pop an ad on FB... and that is what they said too 😂 They also thought anyone would be raking it in within a week. Total bull.

DM has a cleaning company, and she now gets 80+ applicants when she puts a vacancy out... and this could be for just a few hours a week. Not FT work. She has plenty of applications from graduates. People are desperate and are just going for anything.
And because she had the pick of the bunch, she interviews people with a lot of cleaning experience, and not graduates due to them being a flight risk.

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:49

intrepidpanda · 24/05/2026 16:42

my location is between my job and my partner's.
I am not minimum wage but many junior staff trying to build a career are very close to it.
It's not uncommon for career jobs to be lower paid and not uncommon for partners to work in different cities.

Would you rather the women just took what she could get near her husband's job and forget about having a career. Maybe just make some babies instead

Keeping NMW artificially high is what keeps people out of the jobs market, because as soon as you make it uneconomic to hire people, rather than say invest in automation, or move your production overseas, then guess which route employers take? Life on NMW should be hard, it’s what makes people to strive for better.

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:47

fouroclockrock · 24/05/2026 09:26

Actually, I think we need to address the cost of housing and the utter lack of genuinely affordable housing before anything else.

Absolutely. The situation in England is about to get a lot worse with the advent of the new legislation (I agree with pro-tenant law but this has been badly implemented). Councils need to be funded to buy housing as well as building it. Some sort of fair rent system needs to be implemented. We will never improve things until we take sparse and unaffordable private sector housing out of the mix.

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:43

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 15:47

Do you honestly not realise that some people don't live on a bus route? (Or even a train route, come to that.) If they work too far away to walk or cycle, what are they supposed to do? And a lot of people fall into this category.

And what about people in jobs such as care work, who often have large areas to cover and who aren't given enough travel time between appointments to walk, cycle or bus it? Similarly cleaners who have equipment to lug between cleans? Mobile hairdressers? Gardeners/handymen?

Sounds like you've led a sheltered life, or lived in a town or city all your life, or both. For very many people a car is indeed a necessity.

I live rurally thanks. NMW should be just high enough to pay for the absolute necessities, same as benefits. And that does not include a car. Some people do of course need a car for their job but that is between them and their employer, not something that should factor in when setting minimum wage.

intrepidpanda · 24/05/2026 16:42

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:36

What’s that got to do with it? You’ve chosen where you live, and chosen where you work, knowing that you will need a car to get to work. If you were only capable of getting a NMW job you would make very different choices.

my location is between my job and my partner's.
I am not minimum wage but many junior staff trying to build a career are very close to it.
It's not uncommon for career jobs to be lower paid and not uncommon for partners to work in different cities.

Would you rather the women just took what she could get near her husband's job and forget about having a career. Maybe just make some babies instead

ForWittyTealOP · 24/05/2026 16:41

Hotupnorth · 24/05/2026 10:59

I wondered how long it'd take the what about crowd. Don't be so obtuse, you know perfectly well I wasn't referring anyone with a serious disability. Those aren't choices of any kind.

Well you say that but how do you measure the severity of disability? Serious question - if you were creating policy, what criteria,would you apply?

HobGobblynne · 24/05/2026 16:39

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 15:09

You think that NMW should be enough to run a car in addition to paying for the basics? That’s bonkers. A car is not a necessity like housing and food. People who can’t afford one (and many who can) get the bus, walk or cycle.

as a parent of 4 it costs me less to run a car each month by a considerable amount than it would to pay for the bus for us all to get to work and school from the village we live in.

edited to add: I didn’t choose where I live, we were forced to relocate after my landlord sold up (for the second time in two years) and couldn’t get a house anywhere near where we were living. We’re now 14 miles from school and we couldn’t change school as the nearest one has no space.

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 16:36

intrepidpanda · 24/05/2026 16:32

If I left for my work now on public transport it would take 14 hours.
Edit to add: it's a 40min drive (many sections not accessible to cycles)

Edited

What’s that got to do with it? You’ve chosen where you live, and chosen where you work, knowing that you will need a car to get to work. If you were only capable of getting a NMW job you would make very different choices.

FernFaery · 24/05/2026 16:35

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 16:32

I totally agree with most of these suggestions, but just wanted to point something out re people talking about what they can't do. Frequently they aren't being defeatist or making excuses, but are pointing out the genuine difficulties lots of people face, in the hope certain realities might start to percolate through to the hard of thinking (I don't mean you, I'm speaking generally about how these threads tend to go.)

No one is saying it's impossible for, say, disabled people to get a job, but there's a huge number of people on MN who seem extremely ignorant of the limitations some disabled people face. A lot of morons people post along the lines of 'But work will make you feel better! A few weeks of walking up three flights of stairs in an office with no wheelchair access, and you won't even need your wheelchair any more! You're just being negative! It's all a matter of mindset! You just don't want to work because you're rolling in it on PIP [!!] and get your nails done every Thursday!' OK, I've exaggerated somewhat there for dramatic effect, but you get my general point - it's important to challenge the more ignorant/clueless narratives, and in that context saying certain things aren't possible isn't negativity, it's realism.

Similarly when people are struggling to find work for genuine reasons, there's so much 'There are plenty of jobs, there must be because just the other day my local cafe was advertising for someone to clear the tables', 'They're not trying hard enough, otherwise they'd have found a job by now' (according to some recent figures many job seekers in the UK send out 50 to 100 applications before they finally strike it lucky, employers are receiving 20–50+ applications on average for each vacancy they advertise, and graduate roles can attract 140+ applicants each), 'In my day you went into every business in town with a CV until someone agreed to hire you', 'They can just retrain' (sometimes true, but takes time), and in one memorable example last weekend, 'Why don't they just set up a cleaning company, they'd be raking it in overnight and if anyone disagrees with me they're just not go-getting enough!'

The sheer ignorance and prejudice some people post on MN (again I don't mean you) needs challenging, and some so-called excuses are actually valid reasons. When people point that out, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are being negative or defeatist although I get how it could seem that way.

But equally you’re using somebody in a wheelchair as an example, when we know the majority are MH/ND related.

intrepidpanda · 24/05/2026 16:32

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 15:09

You think that NMW should be enough to run a car in addition to paying for the basics? That’s bonkers. A car is not a necessity like housing and food. People who can’t afford one (and many who can) get the bus, walk or cycle.

If I left for my work now on public transport it would take 14 hours.
Edit to add: it's a 40min drive (many sections not accessible to cycles)

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 16:32

RubyPowderPuff · 24/05/2026 12:34

There needs to be a stop for the low wage economy. NMW should be enough to live on. That's housing, food/clothes and transport (in most cases a car). Then by all means help families with children by giving them extra in child benefit. Tapered to reflect earnings but not as an extra income or a universal payment to everyone.

Then we can look after our most vulnerable properly. Give people who are ill or genuinely unable to work a decent amount to live on.
If someone falls on hard times, give them enough time and support to sort themselves out 18 mounts to 2 years should be sufficient.

Also, so many people on these threads always talk about what they can't do, maybe it's time for people seeking work to think about what they realistically can do. There should be more pride in the ability to support oneself.

I totally agree with most of these suggestions, but just wanted to point something out re people talking about what they can't do. Frequently they aren't being defeatist or making excuses, but are pointing out the genuine difficulties lots of people face, in the hope certain realities might start to percolate through to the hard of thinking (I don't mean you, I'm speaking generally about how these threads tend to go.)

No one is saying it's impossible for, say, disabled people to get a job, but there's a huge number of people on MN who seem extremely ignorant of the limitations some disabled people face. A lot of morons people post along the lines of 'But work will make you feel better! A few weeks of walking up three flights of stairs in an office with no wheelchair access, and you won't even need your wheelchair any more! You're just being negative! It's all a matter of mindset! You just don't want to work because you're rolling in it on PIP [!!] and get your nails done every Thursday!' OK, I've exaggerated somewhat there for dramatic effect, but you get my general point - it's important to challenge the more ignorant/clueless narratives, and in that context saying certain things aren't possible isn't negativity, it's realism.

Similarly when people are struggling to find work for genuine reasons, there's so much 'There are plenty of jobs, there must be because just the other day my local cafe was advertising for someone to clear the tables', 'They're not trying hard enough, otherwise they'd have found a job by now' (according to some recent figures many job seekers in the UK send out 50 to 100 applications before they finally strike it lucky, employers are receiving 20–50+ applications on average for each vacancy they advertise, and graduate roles can attract 140+ applicants each), 'In my day you went into every business in town with a CV until someone agreed to hire you', 'They can just retrain' (sometimes true, but takes time), and in one memorable example last weekend, 'Why don't they just set up a cleaning company, they'd be raking it in overnight and if anyone disagrees with me they're just not go-getting enough!'

The sheer ignorance and prejudice some people post on MN (again I don't mean you) needs challenging, and some so-called excuses are actually valid reasons. When people point that out, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are being negative or defeatist although I get how it could seem that way.

Parcelpass · 24/05/2026 15:56

Sometimes to get to work and drop the kids all before 9am a car is needed. What is so difficult to understand??

XenoBitch · 24/05/2026 15:55

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 15:47

Do you honestly not realise that some people don't live on a bus route? (Or even a train route, come to that.) If they work too far away to walk or cycle, what are they supposed to do? And a lot of people fall into this category.

And what about people in jobs such as care work, who often have large areas to cover and who aren't given enough travel time between appointments to walk, cycle or bus it? Similarly cleaners who have equipment to lug between cleans? Mobile hairdressers? Gardeners/handymen?

Sounds like you've led a sheltered life, or lived in a town or city all your life, or both. For very many people a car is indeed a necessity.

I bet they will be told to pull a couple of £k out their ass, and move closer to work.
You are right though... some jobs are still NMW that need a car, and the car is vital. If you are using your car as part of your job, your car costs more to maintain, and you don't even get much in the way of reimbursement for that.

It it more sad to have the view that NMW should not be enough to run vehicle. Talk about a race to the bottom.

thatsgotit · 24/05/2026 15:47

FernandoSor · 24/05/2026 15:09

You think that NMW should be enough to run a car in addition to paying for the basics? That’s bonkers. A car is not a necessity like housing and food. People who can’t afford one (and many who can) get the bus, walk or cycle.

Do you honestly not realise that some people don't live on a bus route? (Or even a train route, come to that.) If they work too far away to walk or cycle, what are they supposed to do? And a lot of people fall into this category.

And what about people in jobs such as care work, who often have large areas to cover and who aren't given enough travel time between appointments to walk, cycle or bus it? Similarly cleaners who have equipment to lug between cleans? Mobile hairdressers? Gardeners/handymen?

Sounds like you've led a sheltered life, or lived in a town or city all your life, or both. For very many people a car is indeed a necessity.