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AIBU?

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Original poster

To worry more about adult DC than I ever did when they were little

258 replies

BurnoutGP · 22/05/2026 23:37

I was never an anxious parent. But now I think a combination of menopausal anxiety and no control over what they do, I worry constantly and think the worst possible outcomes. Both are lovely capable mostly responsible girls.
DD1 is 24 and travelling. I worry about her constantly. Haven't heard from her for 12hrs/she hasn't posted on SoMe and my brain worm is thinking all sorts. She's 6hrs ahead so is obviously asleep.
DD2 is 18 and out for a friend's birthday. Now in the pub and am having to sit on my hands not to message her.
This is never going to stop is it ?

OP posts:
Mossstitch · 22/05/2026 23:56

Afraid not, one of mine did 6 hour drive on motorway today and I was so grateful of 'last seen' on whatapp as I can see he's alive..........he's nearly 40!😳 I worrry about when I'm dead whose going to look out for them, one has a partner so don’t worry as much about him but others don't have anybody but me and each other and I can't bear the thought of not being here for them.🤦‍♀️

Runnersandtoms · 22/05/2026 23:54

Totally with you. I was worrying this evening about DD19 who had a rubbish time and went home early from a uni ball. Now I see on Life360 she's out again at a nightclub. In some ways I'm pleased but on the other hand now worrying about her walking home late in a minidress. I don't think I'll ever stop worrying about my kids tbh.

Losingtheplot2016 · 22/05/2026 23:54

I think heavy duty worry kicked in when mine were teenagers but I totally agree ! I was so much more in control when they were little

BeaPerry · 22/05/2026 23:51

Totally agree !!!

Bufftailed · 22/05/2026 23:51

We’re never going go stop worrying. DC teenager out at party, lying here waiting. I’ve been abroad a lot. My DM said she crossed the days off on one v adventurous trip I did.

Finchfly · 22/05/2026 23:49

You are 100% NBU!! Mine are pretty much the same as yours. You don't suddenly stop caring about them, the worries are different but still abundant!

When I see my SIL fretting herself silly about her 2 toddler DC to the point of her going doolally, I really wish I could tell her - you ain't seen nothing yet girl. Just wait til they're driving and out partying and you don't know where they are! 🤯🤯

Spaghettioverload · 22/05/2026 23:46

I don’t know if it’s true but I’ve always imagined there will be this period of between when they leave home and when they settle down with a stable relationship, job and their own home , that will be very worrisome. I think once they’re settled I’d worry less.

raisinglittlepeople12 · 22/05/2026 23:44

My daughter is a baby, and I honestly dread the thought that one day she’ll be grown and I will not being able to be with her 24/7 keeping her safe. Completely understand how you feel.