AIBU to keep my Monday off rather than swap for a new parent?

There's no chance I'd give up my Mondays for her. Brutal no...and I'm being honest.
Life rarely chucks a gem like this in your path, you might never get such a good arrangement again.
I'd love it if it were possible for her to have Monday off as well...but not at my expense.

With that approach she was hardly going to charm you into making a change was she? YANBU and non of her business how many days you chose to work, whether you have kids or not, let alone if she deems them old! Wednesday is a good day to have off anyway, breaks up the week!

She also alluded to the fact that people who were 4 days with older children should return to full time to free up others to have those days but again, I dont want to be full time.

See, at this point I'd have laughed out loud and said, 'Stop it Sarah, you are embarassing yourself now! You are making an argument for the fact that part time workers are selfish for not returning to work full time because you want them to and it suits you better. That's a cringe worthy level of entitlement'.

YANBU, as long as your employer isn’t doing anything illegal or immoral the details of your contract of employment are nobody else’s business! Neither is what you do on your non-working day. Your colleague is being completely unreasonable. Anyone is able to apply for or request a different working pattern including people who don’t have children, have older children, have caring responsibilities or just want to have an extra day to do what they want.

You can change it. Just click on the option you want.

Also … part time working is the right of all. Not just for mothers of small children. People can want to work pt for all kinds of reasons. So to suggest you should go back full time because kids are older is ridiculous.

I did lol at 4 being grown up. You stick to what works for you as a family. She only has one child to juggle.

Why do you give a shit what she alluded to, though?

If you don’t want to work full time, then don’t. Why would that be unreasonable? Why do you need strangers on the internet to tell you it’s okay? It’s nothing to do with anyone else. If we all went ‘yes, it’s completely unreasonable, you should work full time’ would you genuinely doubt yourself, rearrange your life and do it?

The level of self doubt and need for external validation some people on here seem to have is shocking.

Keep your day. It’s your established routine and you’ve built your schedule around it. She is starting out and can build hers around Wednesday. Wednesday off sounds pretty good to me.

I accidently hit unreasonable! But you aren't. Keep your day off. Mines on Wednesday but I can see the appeal of a Monday too.

As an aside, and missing the point a bit - get your Christmas leave booked early or she’ll be wanting everyone to give that up for ‘people with young children..’

I agree with you on not swapping days and also keeping to 4 days. But I also kind of agree with the fact that parents who go part time when they have kids don’t then go back to full time working making mothers who have children later on then not be able to go go part time because there might not be cover at work.

Thats why I think roles that are changed to less days should have a periodic review and not be a permanent change.

Wednesday is a much better day off when returning. She will soon realise that.
She will also realise that the world doesn't revolve around her.

I have tue and wed off. Love it. Not a hope in hell would I change it. Your kids are still quite young and colleague doesn’t know your childcare arrangements etc cf in my opinion

I have Mondays off, no way would I change it.

Although you don't get the "extra" days off for bank hols, you usually end up in "credit" for them if your company is closed - you still get a bank holiday entitlement and as usually the other ones never add up to what you get given, you end up with bonus holiday days to use whenever you want!

Def don't tell her that though ha ha!

Its not your problem OP you have your own family life to think about.

If you swapped because you have older kids and then had another baby would you have the right to then demand she changes her day off,she’s a cheeky cow!

She sounds a little rude - eg people with older children should give it up - I wouldn’t classify your children as old.

Stick to what works for you - she’ll probably want first options at Christmas because she has a young child.

enjoy your Monday off ( I have Mondays off and love not going to work after a leisurely weekend plus I get to use the bank holiday Monday allowance elsewhere)

I think a Wednesday off has lots of positives!

Never more than 2 days at work is a good one, plus getting the bank holidays too

While I don't think the OP is unreasonable, you saying she should have had children years ago is actually pretty stupid.

Not unreasonable at all, I've worked 3.5 days/week for years, even pre DC, with no plans to work full time.

That’s her problem not yours, if you like a Monday off don’t give it up if you don’t want to, you could accommodate her then she leaves and your stuck with a day you don’t want.

It's all very easy to tell others how they should live their lives, I'm sure she would be just as aggreable in the reverse position!

While I personally disagree that Wednesday off is great, no way I’d be giving up my arrangements or expecting anyone else to do so.

If I was you I wouldn’t change my day off if I had no children or if my children were adults. Sure she’ll get over it.

Yanbu but ime, different days suit different people for a variety of reasons.
Perhaps this is something for management to address in the form of a consultation?
That would seem fair to me.