AIBU to keep my Monday off rather than swap for a new parent?

Ignore her.

YANBU at all

Your children are just the ages when I’d say it’s most beneficial to have the Monday. Busy weekends and then you need the actual down time. And the kids are in school regardless.

With a very little one, a Weds is perfect as the little one then only has to have two days in a row in childcare at any given time.

Anyway, that doesn’t really matter. With things like this, first come first served is the only way. You can’t start comparing need as it’ll get you nowhere.

I have a Tuesday off and although it seems like a strange day to have off, I enjoy it. She just needs to try it out. I’d be happy with a Wednesday. Personally, I would want the week broken up rather than a long weekend. She need to build her life around what’s offered.

I think you have that the wrong way round.

If she'd asked nicely, I might have considered it, but from your description she'd be the last person to do the same for someone else.

She’s quite entitled isn’t she! Does she also think people without young children should avoid booking vacation during summer and Christmas?

Enjoy your Mondays OP, they are yours contractually and morally.

She’s mad anyway because Wednesday is the best day off and she’s lucked out generally with such a flexible workplace.

This reminds me of when I managed a large secretarial team and a maternity returner was furious because I denied her request for Fridays off because 3 other people were already off on Fridays. She put in a complaint as apparently it was unfair she couldn't have Friday when I'd 'set a precedent by giving other people Friday off'. Er no love, thats precisely the reason you cant have it, pick any other day and its yours!'

Please don't allow her to guilt trip you. YANBU.
Just tell her you cant do anything about it and she should to take it up with management. If she then moves from passive agressive mode to directly asking you to move your day you can tell her no, it doesn't suit you or your family. End of discussion.

I used to work condensed hours & had a Wednesday off. I liked it. I never worked more than 2 days & it broke the week up.

I'm not sure if I could put up with her whining for any length of time. She either accepts what's on offer or finds another job. Your working days are no business of hers.

You are not unreasonable
She should have had children years ago if she wanted different non-working days!

I would not give up a non working Monday nor Friday

First come, first served. I’m returning in 2027 from Mat leave - 3 days a week. I’d like Friday and Monday off but there are so many people with Fridays off already, I know it won’t be allowed. I will have to settle for a Monday and Tuesday. Why should I ask anyone to give up their Friday for me?? You are not being unfair so please don’t feel guilty.

She is being rude and entitled.

You have said no and she should accept that and move on.

10, 8 and 4 is not grown up, I wouldn’t swap just because she thought that.
That said, I used to have Mondays off but then we had to have a restructure which resulted in me having Wednesdays off instead. I loved it, much better day off. The don’t call Wednesday the peak of the week for nothing.

Mondays are the day no one wants off in our office! Having any other day off rather than Mondays means you can use your BH allowance more flexibly. I'd pick Weds off in preference - in fact I did.

YANBU, your day is your day.

Also older kids are not “easier “ than babies! 😂 especially when you have a few

Your youngest is 4!!! You have young children and one very young child , you are nowhere near your kids being grown up 😂. Also you have 3, it’s much harder to balance multiple kids vs one . Honestly op keep your day off . I’ve much older kids but had them youngish , I find the preteen , teen years exhausting.

Ultimately, if she's not happy, she can find a job elsewhere with hours that do suit her.

It's what I did when mine started school, and I couldn't get the flexibility I needed because the people who were on the early shift (finishing at 2:30, ideal for school pick up) were unwilling to change their hours, despite them not needing to do a school run for the previous 30 years...

They've asked me if I'll return 4 times since I left. It's like an annual event now!

We have to wait for a Monday or Friday NWD at our place as they’re the most popular. One of my colleagues had to wait years for people to leave to get his.

Why does having a baby mean she needs a Monday off? Don’t budge OP.

I would find it hard to resist not saying "well you know, it'll be interesting to see how you feel about working five days and the logistics of changing your day off when you've got three kids"

Exactly this! I have Mondays off I wouldn't give up. I still get the BH entitlement to use when I want, which means pretty much an extra week off to use when I want. It's great 😃

i found that!

Well she’s off to a flying start for parental entitlement isn’t she? Only just become a parent and already whingeing that she should be a special case.

i work with the same cry baby
although being a parent has nothing to do with it

Its her hard luck. Shes just whining because you have somehting she wants. Its tough. Your work pattern is establish.