Catholic guilt?

'There are so many examples of Christians doing wonderful things, which are sadly more than offset by them doing bad things.'
I don't think I could agree with that.

'The problem with Christian and other religious charities is that they carry an evangelical aspect .' Again, this is a claim but I don't agree this is always the case, or may not be bad if they do. There may well not be any strings attached.

'it is taught as fact, which is essentially dishonest.' I don't sense any dishonesty.

'As to spirituality ...'; you don't need a definition; it's an experience.

"As someone who worked for a brain injury service I know what makes us who we are." Really?😳A big claim! Most people admit the limits of human knowedge!

You've stated your subjective opinions, which is fine, but there's no evidence for them, and you haven't persuaded me of anything.

There are so many examples of christians doing wonderful things, which are sadly more than offset by them doing bad things. So the christianity is good does not hold water as a concept. It is a bit of both.

The problem with christian and other religious charities is that they carry an evangelical aspect - not quite as bad now as in the Victorian missionary era, but I think kindness should come without strings of any kind. Never fill a Christmas shoebox - they are sponsored by evangelical right wing American fundamentalists who sneak a religious tract in.

I have no problem with understanding metaphor - my problem is that religion is not taught to chidlren in that way - it is taught as fact, which is essentially dishonest.

As to spirituality - I have never yet heard a credible definition of this.

As someone who worked for a brain injury service I know what makes us who we are.

Your post almost sounds like you are making it up. I went to Catholic schools in the 80's and 90's and don't recognise this atoll. The schools were almost too lenient. I remember when I made my first confession the priest told me what I said wasn't really a sin, but to say a couple of hail Mary's anyway.

Alan, I really think you don't know anything about Christianity. That's because you're stuck in your head. Christianity is not about literal facts. It's about spirituality and metaphors. I don't think you do spirituality and metaphor. You're a literal, facts are facts person.
I recommend you stop being so angry, go online and search out some good things abpout Christianity, perhaps some brave individuals llke Maximilian Kolbe, who volunteered in a concentration camp to be killed in place of another man because the other man had a family. That's was heroic and inspired by his religion, but also a bit tragic, so look at Christian charities and education and what they achieve. Ask AI what benefits a sense of religion can bring to people's lives.
Don't talk about it, just think about it. Eventually you may find yourself a little more understanding of another pov. It may make you feel calmer.

Please do not live your life burdened with this guilt which has been imposed by warped minds. Just get out there and be kind. If there were to be a deity who is checking your every thought and move I am sure that kindness would get its vote - or maybe not?

My views are coloured by the fact that my grandfather was an orphan and was brought up in a catholic boys home - need I say more?

None of those things require the existence of a deity ...

That's right.
As I understand it, though no expert, there are two strands to Christian denominations. Firstly, there are the religious texts; secondly, there is the manmade interpretation of these teachings, which changes in the light of societal changes.

@RedTagAlan post above should have been a response to your message.

There is plenty of evidence that God exists to name a few examples: the cosmos, fine-tuning of the universe, origin of life, design in biology, the historical record of Jesus, people's personal experiences, morality, consciousness .... you need more faith to believe there is not a God than to believe there is one.

There is plenty of evidence that God exists to name a few examples: the cosmos, fine-tuning of the universe, origin of life, design in biology, the historical record of Jesus, people's personal experiences, morality, consciousness .... you need more faith to believe there is not a God than to believe there is one.

I don't think any of this shows that you are informed about the reality of the RC Church in the UK in 2026.

I think English people have some deeply weird ideas about Catholicism. I remember being very struck by Tony Blair not converting till after he left office, and realising that some of the thinking around it suggested a lot of people still see Catholics as vaguely seditious and ‘controlled from Rome’.

I’ve certainly heard much odder ideas from some C of E evangelicals.

Whatever the nuns did during my education (cradle Catholic turned atheist), at least no one expected us to think Genesis was literally true.

Please don’t make unfounded criticisms of institutions you know nothing about.

I have several RC and ex-RC friends and I worked for a long time in an RC School and was witness to the teaching by clergy there. I've also done an MA which involved looking at the influence of the RC church on art history (amongst other things).

Plus - I've read Marina Warner's 'Alone of All Her Sex'. I recommend it.

Can I mention the issue of contraception in the Global South ?

Read the gospels. I think the Virgin Mary is mentioned...6 times? But the RC church has constructed a vast mythology around her: for eg, being assumed into heaven uncorrupted (and her girdle/belt dropping off en route to become a 'relic') etc. Her home in the Holy Land actually took flight and flew to Loreto, where it now stands too. And the fact that she acts as an intercessor between the Christian and Jesus? Where is that stated in the Bible? Loads and loads more.

The saints? Where in the Bible are the saints mentioned? Well, they're not, because by defnition they tended to be martyred Christians. But look at the whole massive mythology about saints and miracles (since Christ).

I’m unclear what it is that the RC church teaches that isn’t in Christianity?
You’re giving anecdotes from the 1960s but most readers here do not remember the 1960s.
Homosexuality was illegal then, women needed their husband’s permission for birth control, rape in marriage was legal, birching was legal in young offenders’ institutions, children’s individual rights were not recognised in law, a woman was sentenced to death and hung for a crime she didn’t commit.
None of these things were invented by the RC church.
The world was different then.
So there’s simply no point talking about what one RC priest did in 1960 and treating that as an example of the RC church today.
Please don’t make unfounded criticisms of institutions you know nothing about.
How about researching some of the good being currently done by the RC church for underprivileged people globally?

I would agree with what CoffeeCantata says, there is a lot of extra-biblical teaching and lots of rules in the Catholic Church, which other Christians don’t follow.
I also used to feel very guilty and unworthy, but was fortunate to have a pastor who taught us that we weren’t to live in the realm of our feelings, as they don’t necessarily reflect the truth of how God sees us.

I'm not RC but have worked in RC schools.

I'm not a believer either, but it depresses me that many people dislike Christianity because they think the Catholic church IS Christianity.

Most of what the church teaches is made-up stuff and not to be found anywhere in the Bible. I have a number of ex-RC friends who feel the same as you, OP, and older people (esp women) who remember being bullied into submission by the local priest about a) birth control and b) sending their offspring to RC schools. In the 60s, the priest would visit every single day to break one woman's resolve on both these matters.

It's not Christianity - it's control. If you are still a believer, read the gospels etc and use that as a guide, not what the Church says.

I am not ridiculing anything.

So you are saying the way to remove Catholic guilt is to seek " more modern " Catholics to advise on what Catholic guilt is now out of date. That the way iron age writings are interpreted has changed from just a few years back.

I reckon an alternate would be for the OP to consider dr-converting from religion totally. One can do it oneself. Loads of resources out there.

Because once it is understood and accepted that there is no God or Gods, or sons of Gods, then any religion induced guilt might just melt away.

‘Take religious guilt out of the equation.’
Yes, that’s what I was advocating

‘What guilt has to be in proportion ? In proportion to what ?’
Her guilt. In proportion to what’s reasonable.

Like I said, religious people just don’t think in the way you’re portraying, so there’s nothing to get into a conversation about,
You’re ridiculing something that’s only in your head.

Quote: " This might help her put her feelings of guilt in proportion."

What guilt has to be in proportion ? In proportion to what ?

I am totally for freedom of religion, and freedom from religion. I tend to advocate for the latter. Take religious guilt out of the equation.

I am not telling anyone about anything. I am illustrating a point.

The thread is about Catholic guilt. And here you are, saying I don't know anything about Christianity. Basically the "no real Christian" accusation. And as an ex Christian, I can now add your reply to the hundreds of other times I have had that put to me, and the thousands of times I have heard it.

And it is no wonder it is used so much by Christians, given that here are over 50 thousand Christian denominations these days. Even Christians can't agree on what a "real Christian" is.

You appear to think I am ridiculing a religion, showing dis-respect, but here is the crux. What did I post that is not true ? What is the fundamental basis of Christianity ?

Is it eternal life in return for worshipping a single God ? A God that apparently impregnated a woman, and who then sacrificed his son so somehow something called sin, something that he apparently invented, would magically be washed away. That there is a bad character called Satan who wants to tempt you away from God. Ohh. and if you are tempted away, then his son (that he had killed). will judge you and decide if it is eternity in heaven or eternity in the fire.

Variations of course depending on denomination.

Oh, and this God that demands we worship him. The same God of the Old Testament. The same God who went from being an angry vengeful God who liked the smell of burning animals, done genocide and slavery, to suddenly becomes an all loving caring God. After He said He can't change.

This God, that like the millions of others humanity has invented over our 100k or so years: absolutely zero evidence that any of them exist.

The OP did not invent the term "Catholic guilt". That is a very real thing, and it exists. Unlike the entity, the fear of which, some people use to instill this guilt into.

I think guilt is something that comes from your nature, and your experiences can make it worse or ease it. I'm Irish Catholic. School until the 70s was pretty ruthless, I was there in 80s and 90s and thankfully the caning and extreme discipline my parents endured was long gone, but I was told many times I might go to hell and had a few nuns constantly making us feel like we were bad. The whole race isn't going around feeling guilty about everything now. My parents generation, those in my family at least, went from devout and fearful to quite liberal and carefree. They are wealthy and know how to enjoy life, all the Catholic paraphernalia was chucked out in the 90s and they don't feel a bit of remorse. I however feel guilty about lots of things, I just do and can't seem to help it. My sister never feels a moments guilt (even when she should!) yet we were brought up the same

This is a very good idea.
People here are posting some strange ideas and Catholicism. They may have been true in the past, when society as a whole was very different and these views weren't so strange.
But times have changed and the Church has moved on. I know lots of Catholics and I certainly don't think any of them have the sort of ideas floating around on here.
That's why I think OP might find it helpful to talk to a Catholic counsellor, or someone else who is trained to explain the teachings of the Church in a way that reflects modern thinking. This might help her put her feelings of guilt in proportion.

I was brought up in the Catholic church but go to an evangelical church now.
I have asked God to forgive me of my sins and He has forgiven me. I seldom feel guilty, maybe if I have a row with someone I might, but not often.
When Jesus died on the cross He took the punishment that we deserve for our sins, so that we don’t have to be punished. This is what the Bible teaches - that if we believe what Jesus did for us, and want to be in right relationship with God, we can ask Him for forgiveness and at that point we are born again, forgiven and that God sees us as being clothed with the righteousness of Christ. That doesn’t mean we have a license to go through life sinning and not making any effort, but it means we can relax and enjoy our relationship with God.

'Others ... with catholicism at the top of the list .... pick the bad aspects of humanity and model their god on these: power, vengeance, cruelty, greed, punishment.'

Mmmm no, I don't think so!😳

'The sort of person who loads children (and then adults) with guilt is not speaking for a divine being ... they are indulging their desire for power ... they are pure masochist.'
I agree with this at any rate.