To think telling a child to "cover up" because of male teachers is ewwww?

I taught secondary. Imagine the totally innocent man (let's say a young good looking one) is accused by another child of staring at your daughter. The accusation will quite rightly be taken seriously, teacher will be suspended pending investigation even though he has in fact done nothing wrong.

This happens.

Sorry, I can't agree. I have been perved on while wearing a flappy raincoat.

Also, school is not the pub.

you are right very little can keep us safe from those men and in those circumstances clothes probably don’t come into it. I’m referring to the men who will happily touch you up, pinch your bum etc. that kind of assault. My friends daughter will only wear jeans to the pub because she’s less likely to experience these situations than if she’s wearing a short skirt. That’s the angle I’m coming from

Depends on the office. I have never worked anywhere where that dress code would be acceptable, even now post lock down casual.

You know exactly what it means.

Have you seen how schoolgirls that age are dressing generally? Round my way, they are literally walking around in skirts that don't properly cover their butt cheeks, their underwear on show sometimes. It seems to be a trend..... my mother would have skinned me alive had I attempted to leave the house like that, 16 or otherwise.... Whilst I echo the sentiment of the majority of people, that how a woman dresses does not and should never be an invitation to sex, there does come the question of self-respect and then... whatever happened to a bit of modesty???

I have no idea which school(s) the girls I see regularly are attending, but one of them I recognise as a local Catholic school.... teachers should be telling them to dress appropriately. That's surely part of the discipline of the educational and growing up process?

Plus, the poor boys going through puberty, bad enough for them anyway, but with butts and boobs on display, it's distracting for them.

There's been a dress code at every single place I have ever worked and yes, it should be the same at school.

I worked as a Civil servant which most people would consider a "formal office setting" in summer we all wore shorts, strappy tops, cropped T shirts, most of the men wore shorts unless they had a formal customer facing meeting. In most offices that aren't customer facing you can wear what you want.

This is clearly someone who’s denying the natural feelings people have when they see bits of flash poking out from under clothing.
Why would you do that?

We’re not bothered about arms and legs though are we?

School is not a club and it’s not the beach. It’s a professional learning environment so clothes should be appropriate.

Totally agree, of course it's not okay.

I think this type of clothing for a school day is "putting it out there". It's sexualised, competitive. I'd bet money that a "what are you wearing?" conversation has taken place between OP's daughter and friends.

It’s the wrong thing to wear, and the advice given is the benefit your daughter not the staff

You think women are made unsafe by their clothes?

No, they are made unsafe by male violence.

Babies, pensioners, women in jeans, women in burqas all get raped. Their attackers are not fashion police. Their attackers look for other forms of situational vulnerability.

Even when I was young and skinny, I had round boobs and a high cleavage.

It took years to recover from feeling I was shaped wrong. I shall always be in recovery from an eating disorder.

No wonder some girls are in binders or chopping bits off.

Body shaming should not be part of education.

Probably get flamed for this but…

in truth women should be allowed to safely wear what they want and men should be able to control themselves and vice versa. The harsh reality is the world just isn’t like that and we will never reach a point where 100% of men are going to exercise self control so surely it’s better to teach young women to be self aware and increase chances of keeping safe.

You are right it is difficult whether you are male or female - being near someone who has a large portion of their boobs on show is distracting and not in a good way, whether they are a child or any age.

Because boys need to be liberated from having to cosplay the Dominant Sex and to embrace the vulnerability and playfulness of our shared humanity. Bankers and politicians in suits, knights in armour, Victorian plantation owners in top hats...it is all about men's dominance. Boys need to inhabit their bodies gently and beautifully, not just as protectors/rapists. At every western evening do you can see how men's power is linked to this uniform internalised denial.

Relying to KitTea3

So what do you suggest someone wears if the weather is really hot? I assume when you go abroad on holiday you also wouldn't let your child god forbid wear a vest top cos that's inappropriate yes?

Again the faux naivety on here - it's perfectly possible to wear clothing in really hot weather which isn't a clingy spaghetti strap top. If anything very light, loose and covered would be better

It's not about learning, it's about showing respect for the environment one is in.

In fairness it was someone saying that male teachers were around (so presumably a woman), not a male teacher who made the comment.

The comment about male teachers is silly and smacks of a previous age where women were told to cover their ankles in case a passing man was driven into a frenzy.

That said, when a girl is at school I would expect her to be dressed sensibly. I am not suggesting a buttoned up suit on an own-clothes day, but I would also expect the flesh on display to be limited to head, arms and legs from just above the knee. It's school, which is intended to be preparation for work.

Unless of course you subscribe to the "she was wearing a shirt skirt and was asking for it" trope...

But there is such a huge gap between subscribing to this and wanting young girls not to feel peer pressure to wear ever shorter, ever skimpier clothes.

You can't seriously be asking that?? 🙄

Ok

So what do you suggest someone wears if the weather is really hot? I assume when you go abroad on holiday you also wouldn't let your child god forbid wear a vest top cos that's inappropriate yes? 🤔🤦🏻‍♀️

I had this shit as well growing up. I was unfortunate to have 36DDs aged 11 and was sexualised for it
Maybe the issue is the person who's sexualising kids? Just a thought....

Unless of course you subscribe to the "she was wearing a shirt skirt and was asking for it" trope...

Vest tops have been seen in a few workplaces @The6thQueen

They are occasionally seen on building sites, and also at Nakatomi Plaza (but without hi-viz) - venn diagram crossover - they are the same thing, in effect 🤔
Professional weight-lifters need them, of course, but probably in the form of an all-in-one.
Worn for welding while dancing and singing - potentially very ouchy, Health and Safety nightmare.
Vest tops are the heritage uniform of roustabouts, from the elephant documentary "Dumbo" to the skilled operators of bumper cars today.
Perfect top for dancing with youngsters who have names like "Baby".
Essential for on-call (and unexpected) drive- tarmacking.
Should you find yourself on a plane full of violent prisoners that eventually makes an emergency landing on the Las Vegas strip, you'll thank your stars you wore a vest top 😉

In other words, niche... There aren't many jobs in the real world where a vest top is usual.

Wearing a vest top to school is totally inappropriate @FreeeeeeeeFreeFalling because (although you won't address it) it's sexual/flirty.

Utterly unbelievable. If a young Teacher turned up to school wearing this top most teenage boys would naturally enjoy it but I doubt the Head Teacher would. Schools need to start setting more boundaries for non uniform days.

I think this is the problem with the idea that you stated that girls clothing choices shouldn't be restricted by boys seeing them as highly sexualised.

The fact is, fashion for women and girls is often deliberately highly sexualised. The boys would have to be from another planet not to perceive it that way. The girls themselves may or may not realize it, but the designers and trend setters surely do.

And as soon as the old style becomes more old hat, they push the envelope again, so you end up with trends like butt cheeks hanging out.

It's not the boy's fault that society does this, and they shouldn't have to spend their day in an environment that is happy to look at girls, often minor girls, as sexual objects. Even if the girls seem ok with it.