WIBU To ask for a different lady to scan my shopping?

You said you only have Tesco and Waitrose in your town, but check if other supermarkets deliver, Sainsbury’s cover 98% of the UK with delivery apparently.

And for you doing your first delivery and it being tight time wise - do you have more flexibility during the school holidays?

And Sainsbury’s (it’s what I use but maybe Tesco are similar?) have a minimum ‘basket’ of £50 for a cheap delivery - under £50 I think you pay £7 delivery charge, but over £50 basket and you can either choose a 1 hour slot for £3ish, or you can choose a 4 hour slot for £1.

And if you pick it up from the shop (click and collect) it costs 50p. You just need to have your own shopping bags ready to transfer the food into, as they have it stacked in the van in those bread trays.

Your first paragraph doesn't make sense.

And she didn't refuse the staff member because she was old, she did so because she was slow, which is not a protected characteristic.

Not all old people are slow btw.

My God OP. I have nothing to add to this other to say how badly I feel for you, not only for the frustrating situation you find yourself in, but also having to wade through responses from posters who are too thick to read and/or fully comprehend a circumstance like yours - fuck it’s painful.

I hope you’re ok and your situation improves soon (irrespective of the slow lady in Tesco)

That’s excellent then, because once you and the system have been introduced this way, you’ll find it really simple after this. (I apologise for saying more than once that you can rely on the system not wanting your dosh until the day of delivery; never occurred to me that the first time might be different, as I’ve been doing it so long I’d clearly forgotten)

Anyway, just wanted to mention the Delivery Saver deal, whereby a monthly sum gives you a much, much better chance of getting slots you want, plus it saves you a lot of money on delivery fees. (Very handy for booking slots at Xmas, Easter when demand is high) I don’t think Ive ever failed to get the slots I need.
Highly recommend it on a tight budget.

Do you? That’s an odd thing to say.

Exactly! We're all in a rush, no need to be rude and hurt someone's feelings. Poor woman, clearly working hard still in elder years to be treated like this. A bit of compassion goes a long way.

One is getting paid to do a job and the other is paying for a job to be done. No matter what anyone thinks is right or wrong, customers will end up going elsewhere.

There's a shop (nationwide brand) that I don't go to because the staff are so incredibly slow. And not one of them are older or have any physical disabilities. Only two miles up the road there is the same brand of shop and they're all on the ball.

Shop one is closing down soon.

So rude and avoidable for you to plan shopping time better/use click n collect. When you go to a supermarket you expect delayed time, even with fast scanning like aldi. Maybe you should try there to see if you can organise your shopping perfectly into the bags.

Darling, we're all in a hurry but not rude and patronising to older staff who take a bit more time.

No one needs you to defend the workers here.

@pikkumyy77

This sentence actually tells us everything about you. 🤢

She did ‘scan as you shop’.

Completely disagree.

No person is more important than the other here. Everyone is busy, everyone has struggles and is dealing with life. It’s not a case of who’s life if harder, we should all respect individuals, including shop workers.

Being the paying customer doesn’t make you more entitled of time, we are all equal. OP’s incredibly tight restricted schedule is not this poor minimum wage shop workers problem or responsibility.

The OP didn't tell them it's because the woman was too slow.

And the employee is not just doing her job (or at least up to standard), that's the whole point. Saying things like, well she doesn't care you have the school run either, makes it even worse. Not really customer focused, is it?

Have separate checkouts for those not in a rush or allocate people to an area they're more suited to.

Stop! You are just being pointlessly argumentative and judgmental. No one needs you to defend the workers here.

It obviously sounds frustrating, but I don’t know the solution. I can think of 2 previous service users from my previous job that probably annoyed a lot of customers at their respective workplaces. One was a lady with epilepsy & history of brain injury who worked on a supermarket checkout - she sometimes got complaints about being slow and appearing unfriendly, but she couldn’t help this. The other had Asperger’s Syndrome (yes I know it’s not called this now) and worked in a cinema, and again would have been criticised by customers for coming across as unfriendly. There was a limit to the amount of non-public facing roles she could do in her workplace, so ended up having to leave her job.

It honestly sounds like it would be quicker for you to use a normal checkout. Although you have a limited time before the school run, surely anything would be quicker than the situation you describe?

Ignore the trolls and those who haven't read it all OP. You are doing a fantastic job of supporting your family and it absolutely isn't your fault that the system sets you up to fail. Everything seems to be designed by those who have never faced the realities of the life of a single parent, and the people on here who are flaming you have no clue how hard it actually is. I have had the exact same problem as you, and strongly advise you to take the advice to do a small shop so the system trusts you, I did this and it worked. Good luck with everything, and don't let the bds grind you down 💐

That was a bit rude and could have been handled better. Maybe "Would 2 of you be able to scan as I'm in a rush today? Thank you". Instead of making her feel useless. They also shouldn't be checking you that much or that many items!

I'm surprised they re-pack your shopping. Mine are just taken out of the bag and left on the nearby empty checkout!

I have noticed I get a 'scan check' when I buy multiple items of the same thing.

I was getting checked A LOT and when I stopped buying multiple items, the checks dramatically decreased. I tend to just go the checkout when I need to buy 4+ identical products.

80 items to check? That's a stupid amount! They either trust people to self-scan or they don't, 80 items is insanity. Local sains gets me on occasion but it's only 10 items. Slow still and don't even put them back in the bags.

And no, not unreasonable if taking so long.

I understand how you feel, not wanting to upset someone, but also needing to get moving. Maybe just do online, or normal till shopping so you don't have the dilemma.

Oh that’s interesting to know….I had heard if you get ‘caught out’ missing an item on a rescan then you would be flagged more often for them but didn’t realise it worked both ways if scanning something twice!

I guess it just highlights (like in this thread) sometimes it’s quicker and easier to use the old fashioned check outs!

It’s not the self checkout.

YABU to try to scan 100 items at the self-checkout.

DAMMIT, I thought I was about to be the first to suggest she should cancel the cheque!

OP I hope the eejits posting on this thread haven't stressed you too much
and hope you clear your (XH's) debts soon 🙏

I think it’s unreasonable to ask for a different person, because you’ve chosen to shop with limited time etc. I understand your reasons, but I can also imagine hers - no doubt she doesn’t want to be working on a checkout she’s unsuited to. She’s probably got complicated life circumstances like you do.

In your situation I would probably get a credit card so I could do an online shop and pay it off every month, that way you’re never in debt but you remove some stress and add some time to your week.