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Original poster

AIBU to worry my three-year-old mixes up she and her?

66 replies

TheLilacmum · 20/05/2026 08:47

my girl is just over 3 years old and have a bit of a hard time with using her and she as pronouns correctly.. she refers to everyone as she but she can make complex sentences like “ mommy do you remember when I got stuck on the little slide at the park ? .. she is fine with the other pronouns but I can’t seem to be able to help her regardless of how many times I correct her ..
how normal is that in neurotypical kids

OP posts:
MiaKulper · 20/05/2026 16:55

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DeftGoldHedgehog · 20/05/2026 16:52

Don't worry. I thought at three that DD1 was never going to be able to pronounce words correctly. She said "cram" and "crawns" instead of "pram" and "prawns".

It was odd as she could say other Pr words ok like press or price, and then I would point at the toy pram and say "So what is this called, then?" and she would say "Cram!" It made us laugh.

I can tell you now at 21 that she can pronounce these words correctly! It stopped when she was about four probably.

DD2 still gets much and many mixed up from time to time, mind and she's 17.

snoopydoopydo · 20/05/2026 16:18

She's fine, it's just an immaturity and to be expected at 3. You can just model back. If your DD says 'her is smiling' you can just say 'oh yes, she is smiling' but don't ask her to say it then correct way. Just let her hear your correct way of saying it.

Hankunamatata · 20/05/2026 16:18

lazyarse123 · 20/05/2026 08:48

She's three.

Yep

ChiefCakeTestertoMaryBerry · 20/05/2026 16:15

My daughter used to say things like “Elsa’s got she’s dress on” when she was 3. She soon grew out of it.

PinkHibiscusFlowers · 20/05/2026 16:09

You really won’t be happy until you find something “wrong” with this kid will you?

forgetfulpigeon · 20/05/2026 16:08

I’m a SALT. This is fairly common, pronoun rules are complicated. Many children have issues with pronouns. Just gently model back correctly.

Twinsmamma · 20/05/2026 16:05

My 4 year old calls me daddy sometimes 🤣 🤣 and definitely says he and she and he is 5 in a few weeks, is this post a serious question or someone looking for attention? I can’t work it out, surely no one worries about this sort of thing???

maryhinge88 · 20/05/2026 16:04

The only one with issues is you

Sartre · 20/05/2026 15:55

My 7 yo does this sometimes! He accidentally calls his sister a he or he’ll say him when he means his. I haven’t even thought twice about it before.

EmmaB1309 · 20/05/2026 15:54

Extremely normal

Mh67 · 20/05/2026 15:39

Its age appropriate. But don't correct her just repeat back sentence with correct words.

Bryonyberries · 20/05/2026 15:08

Very normal for the age. Just keep chatting to her using the correct pronouns and she’ll pick it up.

SherbetDipDap · 20/05/2026 14:41

I’m a health visitor and see this all the time. It’s a perfectly normal part of language and social-communication development.

I have an autistic child who never did this FWIW. (Not that they are remotely consistent in terms of their development or skills)

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 20/05/2026 14:33

She’s still a baby, bless her.

rwalker · 20/05/2026 13:39

How you going to cope if she needs to use them/they

Electricsausages · 20/05/2026 13:37

After reading others saying your a regular poster , do you Want a diagnosis or are you just mithering

Peonies12 · 20/05/2026 13:36

user1471538275 · 20/05/2026 09:04

I would suggest you spend time learning about normal child development, maybe even a course that would help with your endless anxieties about your child.

It is unhelpful to your anxiety to be posting constantly here, you need to be challenging your thoughts and distracting yourself.

This a million times

Electricsausages · 20/05/2026 13:35

Non issue
i know 5yr olds who still get mixed up

kscarpetta · 20/05/2026 13:32

She's 3!
I still correct my perfectly bright and normal 8 year old's English sometimes.

Eenameenadeeka · 20/05/2026 09:28

It's completely normal.

user1471538275 · 20/05/2026 09:04

I would suggest you spend time learning about normal child development, maybe even a course that would help with your endless anxieties about your child.

It is unhelpful to your anxiety to be posting constantly here, you need to be challenging your thoughts and distracting yourself.

Gonnaeatalotofpeaches · 20/05/2026 09:02

My four year old still sometimes says my instead of I. We find she stutters when we correct her so we are letting her come to her own conclusions which I’m sure she will. She does speak two languages and comes up with some interesting sentence structures at the moment she always asks for one of things rather than “a” or “an”. We don’t realise how complex learning a language is.

Utopiaqueen · 20/05/2026 08:59

My four year old gets mixed up with his days of the week and when referring to something that happened yesterday always says "last night"

What's your thoughts OP? Is he autistic? ADHD? Gestalt language processor?

He's none of those things, just a normal developing child but you can see this would be the exactly thing you'd pick up on and over analyse it to the extreme.

Enjoy your child. She's a child, not a project for you to manage and solve.

Utopiaqueen · 20/05/2026 08:55

CurbsideProphet · 20/05/2026 08:50

You must be the poster who regularly asks anonymous strangers on the internet whether your child has Autism.

I believe so. The pronoun issue is a new one to add to the other absolute non issues that the poster makes up about her child. I'm beginning to lose track but so far the issues seem to be all in the posters head.

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