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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

spannasaurus · 20/05/2026 08:24

Agix · 20/05/2026 07:20

We need provision for specifically trans people at this point. Transgender bathrooms, wards, etc. It's very segregatey but honestly seems to be the only way to keep trans people safe from men. If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for presenting feminine.

We could stick all trans people in with women, but that's a bit unfair when women also might not feel safe around biological males. Which is understandable, really.

But the biggest issue in this is how easily men will rape and sexusally assault anyone who is not a cis man. Even mentally ill they're not raping all the other men on the ward, but the moment a trans person goes in... Rape. So you can't blame the mental illness else they'd be raping everyone else in the ward already too.

Men are a big problem and I dunno why we're beating around the bush about it and blaming everyone else BUT them for it.

Edited

Men are a big problem and I dunno why we're beating around the bush about it and blaming everyone else BUT them for it.

Men are the problem so why are you suggesting that some men (transwomen) can be placed in womens wards.

It's a disgrace that this female patient was put at risk and it it would be equally disgraceful to put other females at risk by placing any man in a ward with them no matter how that man identifies.

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 20/05/2026 07:34

That’s appalling. Segregate by sex. Don’t impede the police investigation- I hope they are prosecuted for that.

And don’t ask fucking Kelly Malone, the domestic abuser, for his opinions om sex crimes. What relevance was that?

Shedmistress · 20/05/2026 07:34

Agix · 20/05/2026 07:20

We need provision for specifically trans people at this point. Transgender bathrooms, wards, etc. It's very segregatey but honestly seems to be the only way to keep trans people safe from men. If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for presenting feminine.

We could stick all trans people in with women, but that's a bit unfair when women also might not feel safe around biological males. Which is understandable, really.

But the biggest issue in this is how easily men will rape and sexusally assault anyone who is not a cis man. Even mentally ill they're not raping all the other men on the ward, but the moment a trans person goes in... Rape. So you can't blame the mental illness else they'd be raping everyone else in the ward already too.

Men are a big problem and I dunno why we're beating around the bush about it and blaming everyone else BUT them for it.

Edited

So you would put female who say they are men in the same wards as men who say they are women? And this will do what exactly?

Wearenotborg · 20/05/2026 07:33

Agix · 20/05/2026 07:20

We need provision for specifically trans people at this point. Transgender bathrooms, wards, etc. It's very segregatey but honestly seems to be the only way to keep trans people safe from men. If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for presenting feminine.

We could stick all trans people in with women, but that's a bit unfair when women also might not feel safe around biological males. Which is understandable, really.

But the biggest issue in this is how easily men will rape and sexusally assault anyone who is not a cis man. Even mentally ill they're not raping all the other men on the ward, but the moment a trans person goes in... Rape. So you can't blame the mental illness else they'd be raping everyone else in the ward already too.

Men are a big problem and I dunno why we're beating around the bush about it and blaming everyone else BUT them for it.

Edited

Love how your default is to stick everyone in with women but then say it might be “a bit unfair”. I’m sure women everywhere thank you for your condescension. If trans people are unsafe or scared in spaces designated for their sex, surely that is what Stonewall et al should have been working on rather than bullying women. Maybe take it up with them.

borntobequiet · 20/05/2026 07:33

hahabahbag · 20/05/2026 07:30

We need provision that’s separate for some people, side wards, separate wards or other arrangements, each individual needs to be treated as such and provided for as appropriate to them.

I understand that this is contrary to the majority of NHS trust policies, which say that patients should be able to choose which facilities they feel best suit them.

OP posts:
hahabahbag · 20/05/2026 07:30

We need provision that’s separate for some people, side wards, separate wards or other arrangements, each individual needs to be treated as such and provided for as appropriate to them.

borntobequiet · 20/05/2026 07:28

If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for presenting feminine.

A transwoman would be very much a risk for female patients if put on a female ward. We have many examples of what can happen from prisons.

OP posts:
faithfultoGeorgeMichael · 20/05/2026 07:27

This was utter insanity and those responsible should be on trial. The cover up is an utter disgrace.

There needs to be an inquiry into the situation in the NHS because woman seem unsafe in their care as both staff and patients.

PoppinjayPolly · 20/05/2026 07:26

@Agix Agree with this aspect We need provision for specifically trans people at this point. Transgender bathrooms, wards, etc.
not so much the rest…
It's very segregatey but honestly seems to be the only way to keep trans people safe from men. If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for resenting feminine. What about keeping females safe from trans identifying males? Like the woman who was raped by a male on an alleged “females only ward” and was gaslight and lied to that this couldn’t have happened as “no men” on the ward.

We could stick all trans people in with women, but that's a bit unfair when women also might not feel safe or biological males.

and a bit unfair?! Really? How to dull it down..! What about those women who have significant trauma? Are they an inconvenience?

Agix · 20/05/2026 07:20

We need provision for specifically trans people at this point. Transgender bathrooms, wards, etc. It's very segregatey but honestly seems to be the only way to keep trans people safe from men. If a trans woman was put in an all male ward they'd probably be at risk too for presenting feminine.

We could stick all trans people in with women, but that's a bit unfair when women also might not feel safe around biological males. Which is understandable, really.

But the biggest issue in this is how easily men will rape and sexusally assault anyone who is not a cis man. Even mentally ill they're not raping all the other men on the ward, but the moment a trans person goes in... Rape. So you can't blame the mental illness else they'd be raping everyone else in the ward already too.

Men are a big problem and I dunno why we're beating around the bush about it and blaming everyone else BUT them for it.