Work-based anxiety and procrastination. Is it just me?

I don’t think this is normal level of stress and procrastination at all. It’s not normal to be made ill, fear you’ll lose your job, (or to actually lose your job) for your career path to suffer, relationships suffer etc etc because you are so desperate to avoid failing at a task and therefore find it so stressful to even begin it. It’s really limiting on your life and wellbeing.

Also the fact that many women are reporting a negative change in these problems around hormonal shifts that they’re going through, where their coping mechanisms all fall down. That suggests it’s something biological as well as something socially occurring.

I really agree.

Yes I wonder. I was asked to send a CV for a potential new job in January, still haven’t done it yet, oh dear……

I TOTALLY agree with this. Most office type tasks just feel irrelevant to our brains.
If you had to land a plane or remove someone’s appendix you wouldn’t be able to procrastinate.
In modern life, in many jobs, we are told being proactive is the thing, but in reality most people are better at being reactive.
I was a good chef, I was a good bartender. IVE had numerous jobs where I had to think on my feet- all fine.
Give me a pile of work to do “ by the end of the month” and I will fart around for 29 days.

I relate to this a lot! I’m currently doing my PhD and working on the side too. I have days where I’m super productive and days where it just feels impossible to do any tasks, no matter how small. It’s always things like replying to an email - if I respond straight away - great. If I don’t respond within a day or two then it becomes exponentially overwhelming and near impossible.

I’ve done time management courses and tried the focus apps but it doesn’t really work because I CAN manage my time, and do so well a lot of the time; other times it’s like trying to walk up a downwards escalator.

I recently saw some videos on interstitial journalling, which seems to incorporate a lot of the tips folks have mentioned here, like breaking tasks into tiny steps, but also jots down any feelings associated with the task (or task paralysis!). I decided to give it a go and I do think it is helping, as it’s not only helping me to focus on one thing at a time but it also feels like I’m being held accountable.

I thought writing constantly would be counter productive and would just waste more time but I definitely spent more time procrastinating than I do writing down the odd sentence. I have periods where the book is empty for part of the day but I just accept what I did get done and let myself off the hook.

I am sure our brains aren’t intended for 8+ hours of deep focus. I often wonder if we struggle more when WFH as it is we feel we need to be 100% focussed on work, whilst if an average day in the office was broken down, there would probably be numerous periods of work chat, coffee breaks, periods of walking between places which all allow your brain to rest briefly…

I empathise enormously! But clearly it is very normal…or at least common!

I would actually disagree, I think extreme procrastination is much more common than people think. I think a lot of people don't talk about it out of shame.

The trick (for me) is simply to get started. Like that old trick to get to the gym - just focus on putting your gym clothes on and getting in your car. Once you manage that, the rest will follow.

I Undermine the perfectionism by telling myself - “this is just the draft version” “I’ll do it rubbish to begin with and write the proper version tomorrow”. I find this removes the pressure and I can start. Once I’ve started, it’s quite absorbing and ends up being fine.

Copilot is also really helpful for getting you started. It doesn’t do a great job but you immediately see how to make it better / do it your own way.

Hello me.

Oh gosh - me too. Thank you for posting this.

I think I probably have undiagnosed ADHD that has got much worse with peri-menopause.

Thank you, that's helpful. I have a complicated medical history so I probably need to involve my GP in any trial-and-error stuff anyway. Will be interesting to see what they suggest.

There are ADHD medication options that are non stimulants as well, and I believe there are some SSRIs which are said to work better for neurodivergent people than others which you also might be able to try in the meantime if they might be appropriate. I know diagnosis is a really long road (4 years for me from first enquiring to trying meds), but I tried a lot of other things in that time and nothing else really helped. So I would say there's nothing to lose from starting the process while you're trying other things, although I appreciate easier said than done. When I say life changing, I still have huge limits btw, I just don't spend hours in tears fighting my brain every day any more, that alone is life changing.

I'm quite depressed by how many people have said that ADHD meds are a game changer. I mean, good for you, obviously, but I couldn't take them even if I had a diagnosis, as I have high blood pressure and all stimulants are out for me, even coffee (which I know some people use to self-medicate). I've been doing some googling - mainly as a displacement activity, it has to be said 😂- and have found a few sources that suggest saffron supplements can sometimes be helpful for improving focus and concentration, and actually tend to lower blood pressure, depending on your prescription drug regimen (so needs keeping an eye on but the direction of travel is better than the reverse). I found a decent offer so I've ordered some to see what I think and I'll report back once I've tried them. Not a recommendation or a substitute for medical advice blablabla, but thought I'd share it so people can do their own research and see if it seems like it might suit them.

I know what you mean. The only way I can do a difficult task, or a task i have never done before, is to visualise each step in detail, actually see myself doing it as well as planning it all out in my mind. I just can't start a task without knowing all the steps and what i want the end result to look like. It usually means that i spend twice as much time thinking than i do actually doing a task, but the task does get done more efficiently and the outcomes are better in the end.

When you do actually get the jobs done are you happy with the result in the end? Is there any part of the process that you actually enjoy whilst you're doing it? What is is about a job that you dislike or feel uncomfortable with?

I'm like this too. The main thing is I have a job where it doesn't cause too many issues and I don't worry about it too much as that is my work style and I work round it. Like sleep, it gets much worse if I monitor it or worry about it as it is self-perpetuating. I try and get most things done in the "new and novel therefore exciting and doable" phase rather than leave them and let them get to the "I can't even start this as I am frozen" phase.

I have actual physical pain when trying to tackle something when I'm not in the zone. I try and stand outside of it and ask myself why I'm feeling like that.

Yoga and meditation has helped. As a counterpoint to procrastination I also have hyper focus so when I am in the zone I can produce amazing stuff and quite quickly.

The main thing is don't worry about it, it's how you are and just find ways to work round it and with it.

I’ve just turned 52 and hit a wall in the first year of a job with little support, managing two ND teenagers. I’m now on the waiting list for ADHD assessment through the GP. I’m sick of struggling and feeling like I’m useless and I finally feel I deserve to understand myself better. I’m in a professional role with lots of knowledge and experience but I’ve been tearful for months trying to cope with my job knowing I’m perfectly qualified for it. So I don’t think you’re unreasonable OP. If you are, so am I!

I've got no advice either but you've also described me. No diagnosed neurodivergence but definitely suspect something!

I'm currently experiencing the pm slump where I just stare at my laptop screen

Hard relate over here! 👋

Yes most people procrastinate a bit. But clearly some of this can be debilitating - not submitting your dissertation and thus failing your degree or only starting work at 1am when you work normal office hours. Extreme procrastination is far from normal….

Definitely not just you. There are a couple of courses on managing adhd on Udemy which are really useful. I know you said you didn’t want to seek a diagnosis but there’s no need to, to do the course.

Theres also a course on imposter syndrome - is there possibly an element of that?

Im academically able and can pass most exams but bloody useless at actually doing anything 🙄

This may not be your solution, but I find big tasks are overwhelming so I break it into bite sized chunks. Any tasks can be split into subtasks, it takes practice. Maybe try it on a no-risk non work task, so you don't feel scared. Try it a few times then try a work task. Do it in stages. It works for me.

I’m the same OP. It’s a nightmare. I could be so productive but I’m just not! I’m writing a long email at the moment but am clearly also scrolling. I don’t know why and I hate myself for it.

I use lists and calendars in my non working life and can’t really function without them. I used to use them when I was office based and they helped then also. I should probably start again.

wfh has ruined me. I need people around me to hold me accountable. Not that they know they are but I can’t faff so much in the office and being able to immediately refer to people helps.

I'm going to ask the GP about ADHD, I just feel as though they’ll laugh at me.

I love this post, it is so true. Our modern lives are so utterly unnatural and completely different to how animals are meant to live and completely different to how humans have lived for the majority of history!

Honestly, I think the majority of people have this. It's not ADHD, unless we are saying a majority of people have ADHD! Very few people don't ever procrastinate.

Have you tried body doubling? It's the only reason I got my masters dissertation finished on time. I used an app called focus mate where you book in a timeslot and get paired with a random person on a video call, you say at the outset what you're working on and then sit there on mute but on camera for an hour. I found it so so helpful.