To think some older women having tax payers funded ivf are hypocrites?

To be honest, I'm not sure IVF should be available on the NHS full stop and that is a debate in itself. We don't have the resources to treat cancer and save lives, my own mother would likely be dead now if she didn't have private health insurance as she just could not be seen and it turned out she had very aggressive breast cancer. But that's a wider debate about the purpose of the NHS, where do you draw the line etc.

I agree that as a society we are very hypocritical in how we judge and treat women. But it's not limited to this debate. Everything relating to motherhood is judged. Women can't get it right, ever.

The hypocrites that you have zero evidence to support.

75% of IVF is privately funded.

The total annual spend on taxpayer funded fertility treatment equates to about the same we pay in UK national debt interest every 6 hours.

Alternatively it is the same as we spend on the NHS every 2 hours.

There are far bigger costs that you should be concerned about.

This "woman" @Spiderbug what age is she?

Maybe stop discussing the age you were when you started having sex and got pregnant? Because that's not a discussion that comes often for most of us 😂

How much IVF do you think these women are having funded? In my NHS trust I’d get 1 cycle. And that’s as an ex cancer patient.

Well, becoming a parent when you are still a child is often a disastrous idea for everyone involved, but I still don’t see a relationship to IVF.

I don't need to have been a teen mum to hear judgement towards them, nor know people judging older women who moaned about teen mums while getting IVF.

I just think you sound angry over perhaps a personal experience and have generalised.

Do you judge the men too? I’d imagine that the group of people judging teen mums is pretty evenly spread tbh

You know enough "older" women who are having IVF and also criticise teen mums, to make an AIBU of it.

Yeah, course you do.

Where did the anger for that post come from?

So this one woman who judged you for having a baby young is clouding your judgement?

Btw, I literally know 0 women who spend their time complaining about “teen mums” and also know 0 women struggling through the trials of IVF for any other reason than they have no options left 🤷‍♀️

And even that is hard enough to get.

And I paid for my 5 private cycles of ivf in my 40’s

I get what you’re saying and I was a young mum, naïve and vulnerable, I was and am still judged on my lifestyle choices. I’m now the other side working and paying a lot in tax and seeing the devastation that infertility causes to my fellow colleagues. I don’t begrudge them having 10 rounds if it was needed. Why shouldn’t they access NHS funding? Sadly nothing is ever black and white. It’s so easy to judge without knowing someone’s circumstances.

I am going to try and help you out a bit here, because I think there might be some cognitive issues going on.

If I make a statement that men commit the most violent crimes I am able to use factual evidence, studies, and links, to back that up.

If I say that most men who commit the most violent crimes are called Dave and have size 11 feet because I know two people called Dave with size 11 feet who have committed violent crimes - that is called anecdotal evidence and not readily accepted.

Not sure how you are going to police that, OP.

“please could you fill in this form re your views on mothers under 20 receiving state help as part of the eligibility for nhs funded IVF process”

But I’ll bite, seeing as you obviously want a goady bun fight- I would argue that a woman who has left child bearing “too late” in your opinion, and therefore is probably late 30s/ early 40s has probably contributed a lot more tax towards social services/ the NHS in general than a 15 year old 🤷‍♀️

If you have had a bad experience with this happening to you as a teen mum, and then seen it on social media, it's understandable that you are upset by it. But I have never come across this 'hypocrisy'.
Also I don't think you get IVF on the NHS after 39 so they are not exactly older women who this applies to.

Teenage motherhood is such a small issue now, I'm not sure anyone's talking about it. Who are all these women discussing teenage pregnancy whilst simultaneously having IVF, and how do you come to know so many of them?

Can't say I have ever encountered in person or online anyone like this.