Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed Dh calls out little boy by his initial?

211 replies

harvestingsomewarmth · 19/05/2026 10:09

I know it’s his son too and he can call him what he likes but after months of carefully choosing the perfect name together which also has its own well known abbreviation I do feel a little miffed that he has taken to calling him by the first letter of his name.
The letter is also commonly a shortening of a completely different name altogether.

OP posts:
DuellingBanjos · 19/05/2026 10:22

Is you DH posh? All the poshos where I grew up used to call each other by an initial - e.g. ‘H’ for Henrietta.

InterestedDad37 · 19/05/2026 10:21

I'll ask my kids poppet, angel and sweetheart, see what they think 🤔😉🙂

VIII · 19/05/2026 10:19

harvestingsomewarmth · 19/05/2026 10:18

No it’s J which I think sounds like Jay/Jamie/James.
His actual name is Joseph and he could call him the very similar sounding Joe if he wanted to shorten it.

Or he could call him J which is absolutely fine. I call mine Crumpet more than I use their actual name. It's completely normal and it's odd you're annoyed by it.

harvestingsomewarmth · 19/05/2026 10:18

saveforthat · 19/05/2026 10:13

Is it H? I had a Harry and people always called him H. I didn't mind and neither did he.

No it’s J which I think sounds like Jay/Jamie/James.
His actual name is Joseph and he could call him the very similar sounding Joe if he wanted to shorten it.

OP posts:
noworklifebalance · 19/05/2026 10:17

We spent ages choosing names for our DCs and call them anything but their names - it’s just a term of endearment, assuming he totally loves his son.

CanaryLibra · 19/05/2026 10:15

YANBU, especially if it’s Jay, because all I think of when I hear that name is the bellend from The Inbetweeners.

Aleiha · 19/05/2026 10:15

I'm assuming its J if it's a common shortening of another name?

VIII · 19/05/2026 10:15

So I'm guessing it's something like Jackson or James and he calls him J?

It's completely reasonable and not at all weird and I honestly can't see why it would remotely annoy you. Confused

saveforthat · 19/05/2026 10:13

Is it H? I had a Harry and people always called him H. I didn't mind and neither did he.

PluckedFromThinAir · 19/05/2026 10:13

If that’s the thing you find most annoying about parenting with your DH, then you’re lucky. Sounds like you’re both doing really well.

MangoLlama · 19/05/2026 10:12

As long as he doesn’t mind you calling your son by his full name/accepted abbreviation, YABU.

ETA: my DH calls our daughter by a variety of made up nicknames that sometimes have absolutely no relation to her name whatsoever