To be annoyed Dh calls out little boy by his initial?

My son is called Joseph and I wouldn't like this either! Joey, Joe, Joe Joe are all from this name but like you say J is Jay or James. Have you spoken to DH about it? If he's using it all the time people might start calling him J too

Meant kindly - but it's a bit worrying that you're criticising your DH so early in the stages of having a child together, and over something that could also be viewed as a very positive thing: that your DH feels like he's building a special relationship with his DS and has a little nickname with him. You've both named him together and he has his name, but nicknames are fun! They also don't always stick around forever. My DH and I love our children's names but both have little nicknames for them as well. It wouldn't occur to me to be bothered by it unless he was actually calling our child something offensive!

I think he should follow the poster above and call him J-Dog 😀

I don't think I'd use Joe for a small child. I might have once used Joey, but if you're of my generation, you can't do that.

My son is called Kevin Pierce. I wanted him called by both names but he quickly ended up being called KP by everyone, apart from me.

It's irritating but I don't think there is much you can do about it.

I hoped my son would correct the wrong doers himself as he got older but that never happened either!

It’s lovely he has his own special name for him. Are you jealous? Why does it bother you?

So i have a beautiful daughter with a beautiful name and shes get called Dave... Not that she wants to be a boy she loves being a girl... she even gets Davit.. not david but Davit.. So i think J maybe ok, my son also has a J name but his name is made longer (Mainly by me).. and i would never have called him the longer version but it has stuck..

Lucky you didn't call him after that French comic character 'Asterix' as I suppose DH might have called him '*'

Trying to be kind because you are in for a long ride

Your husband giving a nickname/ using an initial is a sign of bonding. It means he cares. As he should. Concentrate on that.

He's the one who jointly chose the name, so there's no judgement on his part - not like unwanted opinion from in-laws.

How old is your son? We called our second son J-dribble for months but once he could talk and understand we called him by his name. We called our first “the shark” for a period as well.

Trying to think what this name could be!

Nah, it’s fine to have his own nn for his child; they have their own relationship.

I call my DC all sorts of things, not always pertaining to their name, and often not what DH calls them.

This
It doesn’t matter what you think. Unless it is bothering DS it’s fine.
You do you.

I really dislike it when people are weird about other people's names. I have a friend who will only call her partner his four syllable first name rather than the one syllable diminutive that he prefers

Even if you gave someone a name - once its done its done! You don't get any vague say over what they're called informally from that point on unless you're stepping in to stop bullying

...after months of carefully choosing the perfect name together...

😂

Sorry OP but you are really overthinking it.

My dad called me Swiss growing up and DB was Q.

I am not made of cheese and DBs name is Harry.

on the flip side Mum called me a shortening of my name and DB H

Neither of these were wrong, they were what they individually wanted to call us as a nickname, which was fine! We still get called these and I hope it doesnt stop tbh

Its not about wanting to call him a short version of his name, its about calling him a nickname which can be anything but for you DH and DS happens to be "J"

People lengthen my dogs name. Very funny hearing a complete stranger add a 'Woo' to the end.

Ian is shortened to E in our house
And my daughter has about 15 nicknames mainly called by her mother..... And changes by the week as she asks me to think of a new one.... But her main nickname is Floppy Bum, or Stinky Malinky Longlegs big banana feet so I think you have got of lightly!!

I think you and your husband are each perfectly entitled to call him whatever you like.

My husband and I each call one of our children by different names. I use her full name. He doesn’t. She (now an adult) is perfectly happy with both.

Similarly I was perfectly happy being called different names by each of my parents and indeed I rather liked it. No-one else ever used the names they did, so those names felt like a unique link between us.

Better than 'Sproggle' which happened to me...
Is this really the only thing irritating you? It sounds harmless.

Our children have upwards of 10 versions of their names that they are called. It's completely normal.

DH calls our kids 1 and 2 😂.

seriously it’s not a big deal

I think you are unreasonable to attempt to control a non-offensive nickname that he wants to use for his child. You're not in charge.
He would be equally as unreasonable if he tried to insist you also used this nickname.

We have a grown up "Jacob". As a toddler he was often called "Jakey" by close relatives and people outside the family. At home, as he grew older, he became "Jake". It would not have bothered me at all if my husband had called him "Jay" or "J" at any stage of his childhood.

As long as your husband is a good dad and a loving dad, does it really matter?

Throughout his childhood your baby will likely acquire many diminutives, nicknames and terms of endearment from you, your husband, your wider family and friends. If he has grandparents who sometimes call him "Jo-Jo" - will that irk you, too? He won't grow up not knowing what his given name is.

You can insist that your husband does not call him "J" (or "Jay") but you might find in his teens that his friends call him "J" (or "Jay") and he's OK with that or encourages it.