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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DD14 and concert

57 replies

ChalkOutlines · 18/05/2026 19:39

More of a WWYD , than AIBU.

DD was invited to attend a concert with a friend , by the friend’s mum. As we were sorting out details, it turns out they will be going on their own (seated tickets) and meeting some of the mum’s friends at the venue. So technically, they would be with adults, but I don’t know them and neither does DD. They’d make their own way there (several stations by tube , no changes). They’d be picked up by DH when it is all over . I said I’ll think about it. While I trust the other mum’s judgement, I’m quite uncomfortable with the set up. DH is fine with it, but then again he’s fine with most things. The other mum obviously doesn’t mind either , but she won’t send her DD without mine. Tickets are all sold out so I can’t go , even if I had to be in a different area.

So what would you do in this situation? Straight up no? Say yes with as many safeguards as possible? Say yes and try to find a way for me to go (possibly keep hunting for resale tickets)? Take them there and meet the other adults/do handover? Any other possibility I haven’t thought of?

OP posts:
Girliefriendlikespuppies · 18/05/2026 19:57

I’d be stressed but I’d let them go, make sure her phone is charged up etc.

Original poster
ChalkOutlines · 18/05/2026 19:55

Smartiepants79 · 18/05/2026 19:51

So will there be some known adult who is prepared to be loosely responsible for them if they have a disaster?? How far away would you be? I think I would be ok if they are sensible.

Yes , that’s the set up. It’s the “loosely responsible “ that makes me feel uncomfortable and the fact that I don’t know these adults. She went last year to the summertime ball with some other friends and a parent(that I knew well) and that was fine. We’d be about 30 mins away by car.

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 18/05/2026 19:51

So will there be some known adult who is prepared to be loosely responsible for them if they have a disaster?? How far away would you be? I think I would be ok if they are sensible.

edmundelephant · 18/05/2026 19:48

Which venue is it? My DS went to a concert at the O2 in Greenwich when he was 14yrs. He went with 4 friends and one parent had to accompany them or they wouldn’t have been allowed in. One of the adults might need to meet them outside. Would this make you feel better about letting her go? I can understand your concerns. These things are difficult when it’s their first time doing it but my son and friends had a great time.

YeBroshae · 18/05/2026 19:48

Close your eyes, take about six slow deep breaths and then imagine the night itself from your DD getting ready to when your DH picks them up. Imagine everything going perfectly and any obstacles being navigated smoothly by your DD and friend and supervising adult. Try to imagine it as though you are following them rather than as them.

After you open your eyes, see if afterwards you feel better about the situation or if you get any ideas of how you can be involved.

Celiathebanshee · 18/05/2026 19:46

If they are used to the tube (and if it is only a few stops then presumably they are), I would just let them go. If not, or if they are a bit nervous, I’d take them to the venue

IamnotSethRogan · 18/05/2026 19:43

What are you worried about exactly?

Are they not used to taking the tube if that's the worry can you just drop them off ?