Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to expect my neighbour to pay after scraping my parked car?

64 replies

Yournextdoorneighbour · 17/05/2026 15:59

I live in a detached property and am currently having some building works done.

I asked my neighbours if we could use their drive to access my garden with large machinery which they seemed quite happy to do. Because of building works and my builders van I parked outside my house on the border of the dropped curb to said neighbours drive.
I recieved a call last night from the neighbour (female) saying she hit my car. I was out so I told her I would call her later. I did message her saying what had happened and she replied I had blocked her in. I hadn't. There was plenty of space to enter and exit.

I got home late so messaged neighbour would call in morning - I messaged this morning and said call when free. Neighbour popped over around 2pm and asked what I wanted to say.
I showed my confusion as my car had been hit (huge scrape on left bumper paintwork deeply damaged) so was expecting some sort of solution.

To cut a long story short my neighbour wanted me to forget she hit my car as I have used their drive and I had blocked her in. I hadn't. Admittedly closer to their dropped curb then I wanted to be but plenty of drive and grass verge to exit and enter.

She did say I can call the police but she has taken videos of where I was parked and it would be my fault as I was on their drive according to her. (I moved my car after taking pictures of where I was parked) back to my normal space last night when I got in.
Neighbour got really wound up and said why didn't you just say last night not to worry about it as your getting works done and the car being damaged with so much going on is something I should
expect. Also your builder knocked when I was showering etc etc.
I did remind the neighbour they were two seperate issues, the drive access and my car being hit but neighbour insisted it was my fault and insurance would agree as such.
I don't want to fall out with neighbour. So I said I will leave it. I have also told my builder not to ask access to their drive again as I don't want any more favours.
Was I being unreasonable to feel annoyed that the two issues were connected and for me to be left with a scratched car which I have to pay for myself? I don't know why I feel so angry at myself for not doing things different but I don't know what I could have done without angering my neighbour.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Bettermuseli · 19/05/2026 11:26

You are causing your neighbours a lot of inconvenience and they have been generous so far. Just get your own car fixed and relations should become sweet again.

OFiddleDeeDee · 19/05/2026 11:26

Owly11 · 17/05/2026 16:21

Contact your insurers and let them deal with it.

This.

Fifthtimelucky · 19/05/2026 11:24

I once scraped a neighbour’s car. It was parked in a very inconvenient place on the corner of a junction and I was having to reverse round the corner to let out a bin lorry.

I think the car shouldn’t have been parked where it was, but I could see it was there and I misjudged the space available, so I paid for the damage. I think your neighbour should do the same.

Flamingojune · 19/05/2026 11:17

Its just a bumper

FudgeFudy · 19/05/2026 11:13

Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:40

I didn't think it mattered initially no because for me the two things are separate but I am
happy to be corrected hence this post? But for sake of a peaceful future I will leave it and accept the damage

Show quote history

This sounds like the right thing. I'm surprised at the number of people who are seemingly only concerned with the letter of the law and place zero value on having good relations with their neighbours. Yes if you want to push the issue the law will be on your side, but at the cost of your neighbours thinking you are an unreasonable pain in the arse and thus never doing you a favour ever again. I'd just leave it too.

Gossipisgood · 19/05/2026 10:56

Get a quote for repairs then message your neighbour asking if she wants to go through her insurance or is she happy to pay half herself. See what she says. Whether or not you blocked her drive is irrelevant, she's damaged your car so needs to contribute towards repair costs. Still take her flowers to thank her for her agreeing to use her drive to allow builders to enter/exit your garden. You don't need to fall out with her over it. If she's awkward with you just be friendly & smile & shout Hi when you see her.

OhamIreally · 19/05/2026 09:24

I’m interested in why you put “neighbour (female)” in your OP when it was clear from the pronouns. Do you consider the term ‘neighbour’ to be default male?

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 19/05/2026 08:56

Just ask for her insurance details then contact your car insurance to start a claim.

vsosi · 19/05/2026 08:51

Nearly50omg · 19/05/2026 08:48

that is bollocks!!! People can’t just go round hitting cars like whacky races just because they feel like it!!! Doesn’t matter WHERE you parked your neighbour shouldn’t have hit your car and is legally liable to pay for the damage caused!!!

Show quote history

No, the neighbour isn’t liable to pay. The neighbour’s insurer is liable.

vsosi · 19/05/2026 08:50

The best thing to do is for you to pay to have your car fixed.

It’s not for the neighbour to pay - the proper solution is insurance and if her insurance pays, then both your premiums will go up (yes even though you weren’t driving - my safely and legally parked car was slammed hard by someone, as in thousands of damage, and my insurance went up).

And your building works have caused a pain in the arse for her as well so you should just pay to get your car fixed and move on.

Nearly50omg · 19/05/2026 08:48

Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:31

I don't think it matters as one poster already said I was too much on their drive so I accept that.

Show quote history

that is bollocks!!! People can’t just go round hitting cars like whacky races just because they feel like it!!! Doesn’t matter WHERE you parked your neighbour shouldn’t have hit your car and is legally liable to pay for the damage caused!!!

Nearly50omg · 19/05/2026 08:45

Report this to your insurance company and give them your neighbours details and let them deal with it

Original poster
Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:42

lifeisgoodrightnow · 19/05/2026 08:40

You mention grass verge as part of her driving solution to get past you parked next to her drive. You are expecting her to drive off her driveway onto grass to get past where you are ‘admittedly closer than you’d have liked’ is that right ?

Please read all my posts. They have previously used it and still do for all their cars.

OP posts:
lifeisgoodrightnow · 19/05/2026 08:40

You mention grass verge as part of her driving solution to get past you parked next to her drive. You are expecting her to drive off her driveway onto grass to get past where you are ‘admittedly closer than you’d have liked’ is that right ?

Original poster
Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:40

Pricelessadvice · 19/05/2026 08:35

But you obviously didn’t think you were to begin with?

Show quote history

I didn't think it mattered initially no because for me the two things are separate but I am
happy to be corrected hence this post? But for sake of a peaceful future I will leave it and accept the damage

OP posts:
Pricelessadvice · 19/05/2026 08:35

Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:31

I don't think it matters as one poster already said I was too much on their drive so I accept that.

Show quote history

But you obviously didn’t think you were to begin with?

Original poster
Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:35

Laura95167 · 18/05/2026 20:35

Tbh id decide if I wanted to fall out with her or not.

I think your work may have been more inconvenient than she assumed or you expected. However, that doesnt give her a free pass to behave badly.

You could call the police, you could call your insurance and give them her name address and reg and let insurance sort it. Or you can cover the cost yourself.

I wouldnt blame you either way, short term id be raging shes was so entitled to damage your car and not contribute to fixing it - but long term do you want to be on unfriendly terms.

I don't want to fall out with anyone and I think that's what she was banking on when she informed me she hit my car. I do wonder if she only informed me as I have a RING but who knows.

OP posts:
Original poster
Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:34

catipuss · 19/05/2026 07:38

Whether or not you were physically blocking her in you certainly made it difficult for her. And that is due to your building work. She has been accommodating, it is her fault she scratched your car but none of it would have happened if you weren't having work done.

Why did you need to use her drive for access if you now say you will tell your builder not to use it any more, surely it would have been a last resort to use their drive in the first place. And domestic driveways don't have sufficient foundations for heavy machinery so you may well have damaged her driveway.

Because i am a novice at this and am being guided by the builder. I did ask the builder if they say no to use of their drive what what happen - he said he would have to manually dig the foundations with spades whereas access to the garden allowed a small digger to dig quicker. Building work is an inconvenience to everyone agreed. The driveway is not damaged I'm sure they would have told me that already they have asked for it to be cleaned so I have asked the builders to do that.

OP posts:
Original poster
Yournextdoorneighbour · 19/05/2026 08:31

Pricelessadvice · 19/05/2026 08:17

Can you put the pics back up with the number plates blocked out?

I don't think it matters as one poster already said I was too much on their drive so I accept that.

OP posts:
Pricelessadvice · 19/05/2026 08:17

Can you put the pics back up with the number plates blocked out?

helpfulperson · 19/05/2026 08:11

FernandoSor · 17/05/2026 16:40

just exchange insurance details and let the insurers sort it out surely? Same as any other motor vehicle accident.

It doesn't need to be any more complicated than this. I'm not sure why you would even enter into discussiins with her.

WonderingWanda · 19/05/2026 07:44

I reversed into my neighbours car, they had left it in a stupid place. I rang my insurer and gave the neigh ours my details too and my insurance paid for it all. I don't think the insurance company are going to say it's your fault even if you were totally obstructing her drive. She has eyes and should've seen it.

catipuss · 19/05/2026 07:38

Whether or not you were physically blocking her in you certainly made it difficult for her. And that is due to your building work. She has been accommodating, it is her fault she scratched your car but none of it would have happened if you weren't having work done.

Why did you need to use her drive for access if you now say you will tell your builder not to use it any more, surely it would have been a last resort to use their drive in the first place. And domestic driveways don't have sufficient foundations for heavy machinery so you may well have damaged her driveway.

Shade17 · 18/05/2026 21:12

Go directly to her insurance company and let them deal with it. You’ll need to inform your insurers as well.

Laura95167 · 18/05/2026 20:37

Why did you have to delete?