AIBU to buy the house I love despite my parents' concerns?

I’d be mortified if either of my adult DCs were thinking of not buying a house they live based on whether or not it was suitable for me to come and stay three times a year.

You're buying a house for you. If you love it and can afford it you should go for it. I assume they chose to live abroad, you should also make choices that suit you.

I don’t see why you’re taking their input so seriously, OP. My parents were horrified when we bought a big, battered old house in a v prestigious ‘old money’ suburb. It wasn’t that the house needed work, it was that the location meant we were ‘getting above ourselves’ because hospital consultants and lawyers live here (near three hospitals) and they thought we should have bought in a LMC suburb whose location was far less suitable for my job and DS’ school. 😀

Just ignore.

@Mt563 I’m confused - why would they keep going back to the hotel and out to cafes, rather than just going upstairs to the toilet?

Given that they chose to inconvenience you by moving to a different country, they can hardly complain that you’re inconveniencing them by not providing a downstairs toilet!!

I know there are exceptions, but in my experience our parents generation give bad advice about housing because their experience/expectations are out of kilter with the market.
We were criticised for not having a downstairs loo, a driveway or better gardens. Well yes, two bed terraces don't tend to have these things, but yes it is all we can afford, and yes that is how much houses cost, no we're not getting scammed!

For everyone saying travelodge, consider how many times you go to the loo during the day. If they're visiting for 2 weeks, they'll have to spend a lot of time put of the house, maybe at cafes, or popping back to the hotel or something else. It's fine for a few days but I can imagine might be tiring and a bit embarrassing over 2 weeks.

Unless this purchase is being partially funded by your parents on the understanding that they have somewhere to stay on visits to your country then I cannot think of any reason why you should buy something that suits them rather than you. I suggest you continue with your original plan .

So they moved away from the UK to somewhere they wanted to be and to a house they liked? And now (because they chose to move away) they expect you to move to a house and location that they like, but you don’t?

I don’t think it’s you that’s the selfish one.

Buy it. They don't have to live in it but you do! Your home should work for you not your parents as you don't have plans for them to live with you. If they want to visit I'm sure there's a premier inn or similar nearby they can stay in.....

Is there a compromise whereby you visit them instead, or you jointly rent an accessible place for out of season holidays together, rather than you buying a house suitable for their needs?

They don’t get a say.

To be honest we did not let our parents see any of the houses we have bought, as their opinions were not really relevant. At no point were they contributing.

Just do some research on suitable hotels or holiday lets nearby. But live your own life.

Of course you should buy it. You love it and you’re the one who has to live there.

They're thinking of moving in at some point and or you being their caregiver when the time comes

Buy the place you love, not what your parents approve of. You're the one who has to live there.

Do you think their ideas about houses are realistic? You’ve said that they live abroad. Does it mean that they are used to different houses ( my non UK relatives definitely do) or they just don’t understand economic realities of today?
They are opening bigger question - how close your lives are going to be and what happened in the future. I think you need to buy what you can buy and what suitable for you but you definitely need a think and conversation about their expectations and yours.

You are daft to be even considering their opinion.

You've found a house they love. If they are elderly and it wouldn't suit them, then that's their issue. If they want to come and stay with you then they will need to book into a suitable hotel or AirBnB.

You don't buy your forever home to suit other people - and particularly not to suit other people who don't live with you!

Just go buy it and visit them instead.

Win win if they have to stay elsewhere from the sounds of it

It is awkward to get around no downstairs loo if stairs are.a.problem but if you can put one in, then that's a non issue.
I wouldn't care if my parents didn't like my house. They don't have to live there. But I did put consideration into making sure it was accessible for them because I enjoy having them to stay.

My mum was horrified when she first saw my last house in the UK - condition of it etc. She eventually bought it off me when I finished renovating ! Live your life the way you want.

Hotel/airbnb/travel lodge!
It’s you that lives there full time therefore 100% your choice! And you are right if they can’t get to an upstairs loo, they’ll be unlikely to be managing the travel (although I Would investigate the possibilities of putting one in as its a proper pain having to run upstairs all the time)

Could their future plan be to live with you? It sounds like they want you to buy a house that suits them (your mum.)