Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Worried about my 18 year old son buying joke shirts from Afflecks Palace

442 replies

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 19:50

Hi everyone, I’m after some advice because I’m really not sure if I’m overreacting or not. My son is 18 and has started going into Manchester at weekends with his university mates. They’ve been spending time in Afflecks Palace, which I know is full of alternative stalls, but he came back yesterday with a couple of t-shirts from the shop on the top floor that does the t-shirt printing.
One of them says “Don’t bully me, I’ll cum” and the other was along similar lines with crude sexual humour. He thought they were hilarious and just a bit of edgy fun, but I’m honestly concerned. At 18 he’s an adult, yet these kinds of slogans seem to normalise really objectifying and inappropriate attitudes, especially towards women and sex. I’ve tried speaking to him about it calmly, explaining why it bothers me, but he just laughed it off and said it’s only a joke.
Has anyone else come across these sorts of shirts in Afflecks or had their own son or daughter bring something similar home? Am I making too much of it, or is this worth having a firmer conversation about? Any thoughts on how to approach it without it escalating would be really helpful. Thanks.

OP posts:
Takemytimeandhurryup · 14/05/2026 20:16

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:01

Well yes, but calling a woman a MILF, is disgusting, degrading and as a boy, he shouldn't be wearing it. Obscene-a-tee i believe he called it, I wanted to confront them but DH talked me out of it.

Oh you are naive.

titchy · 14/05/2026 20:15

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:11

He has a girlfriend. Yes he lives with me (For now. That could change if he keeps wearing those shirts...)I've asked her to throw them away and not tell him. She won't do it.

Do you really not see that you are a controlling bully? How ironic.

As an aside - delighted Afflecks is still going - my favourite place 40 years ago!

MissJoGrant · 14/05/2026 20:15

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 19:55

I agree. I find it tacky and offensive. I've always hated that Afflecks place.

Afflecks is an amazing Manchester institution and I love it.

itsmeits · 14/05/2026 20:14

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:11

He has a girlfriend. Yes he lives with me (For now. That could change if he keeps wearing those shirts...)I've asked her to throw them away and not tell him. She won't do it.

Don't mess in his relationship.

You could lose him.
Stop being a control freak

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:14

SnipSnipMrBurgess · 14/05/2026 20:14

Confront who?

Your son and his friends?

Or the place he bought it?

The place in Afflecks. I've been telling all my friends to avoid it.

OP posts:
GlosGirl82 · 14/05/2026 20:14

Tell him that girls won’t fancy him if he wears t-shirts like that

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:14

PuttyTat · 14/05/2026 20:11

I miss the 90s so much when we had a sense of humour and didn't try to thought and speech police everyone. I'm kind of proud of kids for rejecting this shit.

todays shirt has a big crow and F-Caw-F written on it..

yesterdays declared me "Bat Shit Crazy"

I also own a 'don't bully me, i'll cum" shirt.

I do not GAF.

SnipSnipMrBurgess · 14/05/2026 20:14

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:01

Well yes, but calling a woman a MILF, is disgusting, degrading and as a boy, he shouldn't be wearing it. Obscene-a-tee i believe he called it, I wanted to confront them but DH talked me out of it.

Confront who?

Your son and his friends?

Or the place he bought it?

JazzyJelly · 14/05/2026 20:12

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:06

MILF is offensive and sexist.

Man I love frogs is not. It's subverting expectations, like all humour. I'd just be glad he's into silly t-shirt ls rather than drugs or the manosphere.

PuttyTat · 14/05/2026 20:11

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:09

oh get over yourself. i'm 45 and wear more offensive shirts than that.

good grief.

If you don't like them tell him not to wear them around you/at home.. its all my mom did when my brother came home with a Nirvana shirt with 'mother fucker' written on the back of it in the 90.s

I miss the 90s so much when we had a sense of humour and didn't try to thought and speech police everyone. I'm kind of proud of kids for rejecting this shit.

EverythingGolden · 14/05/2026 20:11

EwwPeople · 14/05/2026 20:08

His behaviour is a lot more normal than yours.

Let’s hope he never gets a tattoo.

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:11

Reallynotthatbothered · 14/05/2026 20:10

Does he still live at home? This is one of those occasions where ignorance is bliss. If he was living away at a University far from home, he could wear what he likes and you’d be none the wiser. These t-shirts sound as if they could be worn ironically. Is your son gay? I can imagine those t-shirts would go down well on Canal Street.

Perhaps your son has changed since starting Uni?

He has a girlfriend. Yes he lives with me (For now. That could change if he keeps wearing those shirts...)I've asked her to throw them away and not tell him. She won't do it.

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock000 · 14/05/2026 20:11

It is dark humour. I wouldn’t wear something like that but I probably wouldn’t think too deeply about a teenager wearing it.

imaravenGRONKGRONK · 14/05/2026 20:11

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:04

It also said "Man I love Frogs" but that isn't what they were meaning, was it?

I mean, I want one of those and I’m a boring middle-aged person. But I really do love frogs.

My brother wore daft shit from Affleck’s in his teens, too. It’s a phase. It passes. Tell him it’s ’very nice, dear’ and it’ll instantly lose some appeal. Losing your head over it will just make it even more attractive.

Reallynotthatbothered · 14/05/2026 20:10

Does he still live at home? This is one of those occasions where ignorance is bliss. If he was living away at a University far from home, he could wear what he likes and you’d be none the wiser. These t-shirts sound as if they could be worn ironically. Is your son gay? I can imagine those t-shirts would go down well on Canal Street.

Perhaps your son has changed since starting Uni?

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:09

EwwPeople · 14/05/2026 20:08

His behaviour is a lot more normal than yours.

Well I have had bad experiences with men in the past. I've had therapy, but that does trigger me.

OP posts:
ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:09

oh get over yourself. i'm 45 and wear more offensive shirts than that.

good grief.

If you don't like them tell him not to wear them around you/at home.. its all my mom did when my brother came home with a Nirvana shirt with 'mother fucker' written on the back of it in the 90.s

EwwPeople · 14/05/2026 20:08

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:03

I wanted to rip it off of him and call him a pig, I was that angry about it.

His behaviour is a lot more normal than yours.

PuttyTat · 14/05/2026 20:07

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:03

I wanted to rip it off of him and call him a pig, I was that angry about it.

Goodness!

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:06

JazzyJelly · 14/05/2026 20:05

It sounds pretty tame to me. He's not joking about anything hurting anyone else. If it was sexist or racist or something I'd be concerned. Being 18 is for learning what's funny and what's poor taste.

MILF is offensive and sexist.

OP posts:
JazzyJelly · 14/05/2026 20:05

It sounds pretty tame to me. He's not joking about anything hurting anyone else. If it was sexist or racist or something I'd be concerned. Being 18 is for learning what's funny and what's poor taste.

itsmeits · 14/05/2026 20:05

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:01

Well yes, but calling a woman a MILF, is disgusting, degrading and as a boy, he shouldn't be wearing it. Obscene-a-tee i believe he called it, I wanted to confront them but DH talked me out of it.

They have a GILF one 😂
So maybe be happy he's only after the mums and not the grannies

Confront him about what?
All he will do is by more!

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:04

EverythingGolden · 14/05/2026 20:03

It just says MILF and nothing else?

It also said "Man I love Frogs" but that isn't what they were meaning, was it?

OP posts:
ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:03

PuttyTat · 14/05/2026 20:02

It is but just tell him to not wear it around you. It is meant to shock and you are giving them the reaction they're after!

I wanted to rip it off of him and call him a pig, I was that angry about it.

OP posts:
EverythingGolden · 14/05/2026 20:03

It just says MILF and nothing else?

Swipe left for the next trending thread