Turning up to church wedding just because you can. Would you?

You're not necessarily not wanted.

There could be all sorts of logistical reasons why you're not invited to the wedding breakfast but the couple are quite happy that you're at the church

I and other colleagues have gone to a wedding where we weren't invited to the reception and it was fine

A colleague we were very fond of and it was perfectly reasonable that we weren't invited to the reception. She knew we wanted to see her married and she was very happy about it

I'd ask myself why would I want to, as I'm not the main character in there and there's no.mass or service on for me, it's a wedding so no.

Same.
Not only did I 'not mind' I was touched to see how many people we had in our Community that were willing to come to Church to witness our wedding.
I mean, we had invited all the Congregation, but it was lovely to see people there like my schoolfriend's Mum, and a couple of people I worked with, and someone from something I did as a hobby, and so forth. I was really touched.

I guess it's a bit odd but fine so long as you clear off and don't appear in the photos and at the wedding breakfast or dinner.

Ha ha, I have never heard of that.

No. Whether it’s a wedding, christening or funeral, best stay away from where you’re not wanted.

There was a chap at my dad’s funeral - crem not church. No idea who he was!

Or nice? As isn’t that the whole point in joining the church?

If half the congregation showed up, then that must be the norm in the parish. Baptisms are nearly always announced in advance to the parish because the whole concept is about the child being welcomed into the Christian community. It’s not at all weird. Maybe your family expected it to be private but they were wrong.

Well I definitely know they were never asked to leave!

Perhaps some of the guests assumed they had been hired! 😂

They were quite fun ladies actually - never a dull moment.

I got married in a chapel within a large cathedral which meant there were loads of random visitors/tourists who had come to admire the cathedral present - some of them saw me preparing to walk down the aisle and took discrete seats at the back, others just hovered at the back of the chapel and then disappeared once the ceremony began.

Several of my parents friends also came along because they "needed to see the dress". I didn't mind at all! In fact, I loved the extra well wishers :) we have out extra confetti to tourists to join in the throw on the cathedral steps!

If they'd followed us to the reception that would have been another matter - but I understood a church (especially a cathedral on a Saturday) is a public venue. If I was bothered, I would have picked a different venue.

Did anyone else remember being in a gang of kids that used to tie the church gate shut during the wedding services and only release it when the groom and best man had thrown coins? I seem to remember that. Or was it just a South Wales thing?

No I would not but always nice to view the bridal party as they leave the church.

A good group of people turned up to my church wedding who were not invited to the meal and party bit (we invited everyone to everything no evening guests)! It was really lovely, I knew them from childhood when I attended the church and my mum still attended the church so knew them well. It also meant the church was packed and the singing was fabulous - very memorable in fact.

I however a few years before this did not realise you could go to the church bit without and invitation, I was invited to the evening do of a wedding but not the meal and speeches bit, some people asked me why I wasn't at the church bit and I felt awful! The bride and groom didn't mind though.

Also anther wedding when I did realise you could go to the church it was a right pain in the neck trying to find somewhere to go, in your finery between the church and evening bit, ended up looking odd in a pub and also spent some time in my friends mums house!

I used to love weddings and brides and dresses when I was little. I was obsessed with Princess Diana - her and Charles's wedding is the first television I can remember watching when I was five.

My mum took me to a couple of church weddings after that. We sat quietly at the back. Only people she knew, I hasten to add. I think it was different in the early 80s - we weren't the only ones.

We booked DD2 months in advance to be Christened at the beginning of a Sunday service (so expected a few random people)

It turned out to be an anniversary of a WW1 event and the church was filled with people, some in uniform, many wearing medals of some kind.

I said we could have rescheduled but the vicar knew we'd had to arrange for friends and family to stay and didn't want to inconvenience us.

My DH and I encouraged members of the church congregation to come to the wedding service, and we offered refreshments afterwards whilst we were having our photos taken. (I’d been a member for some years.) We just couldn’t invite all of them to the reception because there was a limit on numbers.

The legal requirement is that anyone with a justifiable legal impediment can be given access to object, so for high security events that won’t be the same as being allowed to sit through the wedding.

There is a swanky venue in our village used by a lot of celebs for a while and the manager turned a few away who wouldn’t accept that if someone rocked up saying they knew of a reason the marriage wouldn’t be legal the registrar/celebrant had to be informed.

His favourite saying was “security doesn’t trump law” about that and a listed outbuilding that many wanted removed as it wasn’t pretty.

I've been to a couple of church weddings where the congregation have turned up. However they have always respectfully sat at the back and cheerfully sang the hyms to drown out the riff raff who had no idea how to follow the tune. At one wedding the bride and groom held a small drinks gathering in the back room which included any local congregation members before us guests were all shipped off to the reception. It honestly wouldn't bother me and if anything I think is lovely that other people take time out of their own days to want to share someone else's special day. To add these are randoms and generally only know the bride and groom by face rather than any other connection.

I think you'll find you can be turned away- it's at the descretion of the vicar.
I think you might be thinking of the law of sanctuary- where you have to be let in and can't be removed for a set amount of time- murderers and accused witchesvstopped themselves being lynched this way- but this law was taken off the statute books in the C19th. The laws about access to churches were completely changed in the 1920's.
Logistically it would be hard to eject you if the ceremony was in progress, but I don't think it's a right, and never will have been- unless you are aparishoner of that specific parish. A wedding was a public declaration to your community, so anyone from that community could attend- but if you are from somewhere else, I doubt it.

Our vicar advised us not to have that bit. Aparently it's not required, but there's always some joker who thinks it's funny to call out, and once that happens they're obliged to stop the service and investigate.

The only objection that matters is if one of the couple aren't legally free to marry. You can't object because Bob's really in love with you, or the bride's sleeping with the groom's brother.

As a child I vaguely remember this happening too.

However, it might have been a problem if anyone had done this at ours. The village church is tiny; we calculated that 75 was the maximum number of guests we could accommodate. That's roughly how many were invited. If any random villagers had turned up and sat at the back then there might have been a situation where invited guests had nowhere to sit.

In the 80s my colleagues and I would go along to the church to watch workmates get married.
One colleague got married on a snowy January day. Most of her relatives, who were from out of town, were unable to get to the wedding despite having said that they would come. She and her new husband asked us to attend the reception if we were happy to eat what we were given, because they had at least 20 meals that would otherwise go to waste! Us colleagues popped home, changed into something more appropriate for wedding guests and then joined the wedding party at the hotel.

I thought all weddings had to be open to the public, in case anyone wants to raise an objection.