Just looking to see if anyone has any advice or has been in a similar situation.
I fell pregnant with my son at 18. Me and his dad weren’t together long and had ended things before I found out I was pregnant. My son has my surname, not his dad’s.
Fast forward 7 years and I’m due to get married in a few months to my fiancé. We’ve since had a child together who has his surname, and I’ll be changing mine when we marry.
My son’s dad sees him every other weekend and everything is perfectly amicable, but outside of those visits he doesn’t really check in. We don’t hear from him in between, and he’s not involved in the general day-to-day things like school, clubs, appointments etc.
What’s brought this up is that my son recently asked me about surnames and said he’ll be the only one in the house with a different name?
I’m now wondering whether I should look at changing his surname so we all match as a family. My fiancé has been in his life since he was one, so he won’t remember life without him there.
Part of me worries how his biological dad would react, but then equally my son doesn’t have his surname anyway. I did think about double barrelling, but honestly both surnames together are a bit of a mouthful. I also think it’s a huge deal changing a child’s name but that could just be my anxiety!
Would it be unreasonable to consider it?