Page 2 | To have a weekday wedding?

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 2026-05-13T09:06:55+00:00

We haven’t decided anything yet, so just looking for opinions really. Budget is a big concern, I don’t want to spend a lot as it’s not a huge priority for me, so it’s really whether we have a simpler celebration at a ‘nicer’ venue, or a more traditional wedding at a not so nice venue. The full on ‘wedding’ would still cost more, but maybe it would be worth it! Things that are relevant: - It would be during the school holidays as DP is a teacher, so children wouldn’t need the day off school. - Lots of our friends are teachers, so they would be off work too and wouldn’t need to take annual leave. - Quite a few of our immediate family members or close friends (including my dad and DP’s mum) work weekends, so would most likely still need to take annual leave if we had it on a Saturday. So it’s not a case of all guests who aren’t teachers would find it easier on a Saturday. - If we did something on a weekday then we probably wouldn’t have an evening do. It would be a ceremony, followed by something like a champagne afternoon tea. Any thoughts, given the circumstances? I also don’t know which day of the week would be best for people, really, as we also have guests we’d invite who work part time anyway.

ThisMustBeMyDream · 13/05/2026 19:30

I married my teacher DH last summer holidays. We had a Monday wedding. 60 odd in the day, and over 100 at night. All day guests accepted. Most evening guests did too. Wasn't an issue at all!

Deadringer · 13/05/2026 19:21

Champagne afternoon tea is quite expensive isn't it? For the same price you could probably get a 'proper' meal, whether buffet or table service.

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 13/05/2026 19:10

DappledThings · 13/05/2026 10:16

Don't overthink it. Book what works for you, invite who you want to invite and accept some people might not make it. Same as any wedding.

And the bonus is that it will reduce the numbers & therefore the cost .

RS1987 · 13/05/2026 19:07

I got married on a Friday (school hols). I checked with the people we absolutely wanted there to make sure it was ok; everyone else we were absolutely fine with them not coming and made it clear no pressure.

Youshouldbestrongerthanme · 13/05/2026 19:04

We married on a Monday and 4 days before Christmas! A lot cheaper and every guest we invited joined us (mind you, we only invited 16 guests!!)
Perfect.

Allonthesametrain · 13/05/2026 19:00

Yes fine if plenty of notice but understand not everyone may not be able to attend. It's more important to have close ones there who will all make the effort anyway. Xxx

PloddingAlong21 · 13/05/2026 18:57

Prioritise WHO you’d want to be there and the rest will fall into place.

I had mine on a Thursday. Anticipated people not joining (and I was ok with that). They all joined.

RandomUsernameHere · 13/05/2026 18:41

I’d be more than happy to attend a wedding on a weekday. In fact would probably prefer it. I do get quite a generous amount of annual leave compared to some people though, so that’s a factor.

BettyCrockersLocker · 13/05/2026 18:28

I think it's fine as long as you accept not everyone will make it.

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 13/05/2026 18:16

FastLemonFinch · 13/05/2026 16:56

Your wedding your choice but as others have commented anyone who does work during the week would maybe need to take 2-3 days off work depending on travel time so as long as you accept and won’t begrudge declines that’s fine. If it’s a small guest list surely you can ask a few of these people directly to see what their thoughts are?

I get budgets are tight but l I’m not sure an afternoon tea would be filling enough particularly if people have potentially been travelling all morning? Weekday or not I’d be a bit miffed if I didn’t receive enough food, particularly if people won’t have eaten properly since breakfast.

If you want to go ahead with afternoon tea I’d be very upfront with guests on timings of food (when it’s being served) and what will be served so they can plan and eat beforehand properly. And (particularly if mid week) if it’s an early finish people you may risk people leaving even earlier to either head home and or get a proper dinner.

I do think a buffet would probably give you better food options. It sounds like a small guest list already but if not I’d be tempted to reduce numbers invited and then increase per person spend on food/drinks.

There’s nobody coming who will need to be away from home for that long, other than some relatives of mine and they are the ones who are retired. They don’t have any pets or anything either, so hopefully won’t mind too much. There is one friend of DP’s who lives a long way away and is a single parent, so I’m not sure if she will come even if it’s on a Saturday. He will need to discuss that with her, really.

It’s not a small guest list (or not to me, anyway) but it is a small list of Monday-Friday workers. I’ve already asked two of them how they’d feel about a weekday wedding and they were absolutely fine with it.

I’m happy with the food options and I say that as someone who is a bit overweight and quite greedy by mumsnet standards! I do think it will be enough to eat given that people will be able to have breakfast before and dinner afterwards if it finishes at 5pm. The afternoon tea is actually quite a lot more per person than the buffet, because it is very generous and it has a very good reputation. I’ll have to have a think about which one would be better.

There will be 6 canapés per person too, regardless of what option we go for.

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Jackrussellmansion · 13/05/2026 17:20

How about the Thursday after Good Friday, my daughter did this and it worked really well.

8TinyToeBeans · 13/05/2026 17:12

Go with what works for you, but keep in mind that some people may not be able to attend.

We had a week day wedding (a tuesday) because a) it was cheaper, b) it was quieter, and c) it was a tiny wedding so we knew the only people coming would care enough to take a day off.

We probably spent about £3k in total for everything. We had the ceremony at a local castle, then a buffet afterwards. We finished around 9pm, and went for a walk along the beach together. It was perfect!

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 13/05/2026 17:07

PinkTonic · 13/05/2026 16:01

I think if you’re starting at 12 noon you need to serve lunch not afternoon tea. Drinks and canapés, ceremony, lunch. The lunch could be a buffet but I see that word and think of beige misery, so not that kind of buffet.

The ceremony venue (which is beautiful, and we are very set on) is a separate location to the reception venue so that wouldn’t work. I also haven’t ever been to a wedding where there’s been food or drink before the ceremony as presumably the bride, bridesmaids and M/FOTB aren’t there?

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Thechaseison71 · 13/05/2026 17:06

SparklyBlueDress · 13/05/2026 10:15

Perfectly fine but be gracious and understanding if people decline to come. Unless it’s local I think people will only come on a Friday otherwise it’s 2 days off work

Even those who work weekends?

F I was to marry it would be far better to have a weekday wedding as none of the peopl id invite which the exception of my sister work mon till Friday

OP has said many of friends are teachers and it's school holidays. Can't see an issue

BeepBoopTappity · 13/05/2026 17:03

My brother did this and it was a perfect day! It was a Thursday so people who worked weekdays could make it into a long weekend, though most guests were local. Ceremony and sit-down lunch for close friends and family, then additional "evening" guests joined for afternoon tea served as a buffet. There was plenty of food and the last guests probably left around 9/10pm.

FastLemonFinch · 13/05/2026 16:56

Your wedding your choice but as others have commented anyone who does work during the week would maybe need to take 2-3 days off work depending on travel time so as long as you accept and won’t begrudge declines that’s fine. If it’s a small guest list surely you can ask a few of these people directly to see what their thoughts are?

I get budgets are tight but l I’m not sure an afternoon tea would be filling enough particularly if people have potentially been travelling all morning? Weekday or not I’d be a bit miffed if I didn’t receive enough food, particularly if people won’t have eaten properly since breakfast.

If you want to go ahead with afternoon tea I’d be very upfront with guests on timings of food (when it’s being served) and what will be served so they can plan and eat beforehand properly. And (particularly if mid week) if it’s an early finish people you may risk people leaving even earlier to either head home and or get a proper dinner.

I do think a buffet would probably give you better food options. It sounds like a small guest list already but if not I’d be tempted to reduce numbers invited and then increase per person spend on food/drinks.

AgnesMcDoo · 13/05/2026 16:38

In your circumstances with teacher friends and family who work weekends then it makes sense.

For most people it work be inconsiderate but in your case it works.

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 13/05/2026 16:36

chipsandpeas · 13/05/2026 15:53

your wedding your choice, but if i was invited and had to travel a few hours only for the whole thing to be 4-5 hours i would decline

That’s good to know, thank you for your honesty.

I would travel that far for a wedding or a big birthday/anniversary celebration (with enough notice!) but obviously not everyone would. The only people on my side who would have to travel that far are relatives and are retired, so I imagine they will come regardless of the length of the day .

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Changingplace · 13/05/2026 16:07

PinkTonic · 13/05/2026 16:01

I think if you’re starting at 12 noon you need to serve lunch not afternoon tea. Drinks and canapés, ceremony, lunch. The lunch could be a buffet but I see that word and think of beige misery, so not that kind of buffet.

Afternoon tea is lunch though, sandwiches, cakes, and can often include pork pies/pastries and similar to a ploughman’s.

It’s more imo about how it’s served but it can be pretty substantial, it’s not just fairy cakes.

PinkTonic · 13/05/2026 16:01

I think if you’re starting at 12 noon you need to serve lunch not afternoon tea. Drinks and canapés, ceremony, lunch. The lunch could be a buffet but I see that word and think of beige misery, so not that kind of buffet.

Holdonforsummer · 13/05/2026 15:53

My brother in law got married 300 miles away on a Wednesday, which basically meant a week off work. Anything has to be better than that!

chipsandpeas · 13/05/2026 15:53

your wedding your choice, but if i was invited and had to travel a few hours only for the whole thing to be 4-5 hours i would decline

Lulu1919 · 13/05/2026 15:48

The fact it’s school hols helps a lot for school staff
most people can book holiday days I guess
your wedding your choice xx

Scottishskifun · 13/05/2026 15:45

I have no issue to a mid week wedding as long as enough notice is given. The mid week ones we have declined in the past gave 8 weeks notice (towards the end of the year) which wasn't sufficient for our work.

I would also say see if your venue offers twilight/afternoon packages as these can also reduce cost - so wedding starting at 4pm. It also allowed people to travel during the day rather then night before.

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 13/05/2026 14:59

ForPinkDuck · 13/05/2026 14:15

Champagne and cake at a venue sounds expensive and not enough, lots of people dont get time to eat prior to a wedding. You need to feed your guests.
didgeridid perfect wedding! pub buffet (in your town) or bbq in your garden after registry office would be perfect and low key so people can attend after work as and when.

It wouldn’t be champagne and cake. It would be champagne, canapés and then either a finger buffet or an afternoon tea plus wedding cake a bit later. The place is quite well known for its afternoon tea and it does come with sandwiches, a sausage roll and a cheese scone so a good balance of sweet and savoury.

I would rather have the finger buffet, so if that’s the general preference on here then it’s fine by me!

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