To disagree with home ed

Double post

I think home, for some, will be better than school. Especially if there are constant substitute teachers who aren’t really teaching content or able to handle a class who mess about because it isn’t their usual teacher.

A good teacher who can keep a class well managed and engaged will be better than a parent trying to teach at home but a parent might be better placed to teach if the child is pretty much being left to teach themselves at school anyway.

If you’re going to home ed though the people doing it through choice rather than desperation are probably better placed to do so and the children do need to have regular contact with the outside world.

So much humanity has been stripped out of schools..It's not extreme to have SEN or struggle.to cope in an environment where the toilets are locked up, and gender neutral with the locks having been vandalised, learning to parrot 30 paragraphs is the accepted way to study for a language GCSE, and English lit consists entirely of memorising nano quotes and expounding on them. 30 min breaks at 11.30 or 1.30, tiny canteen for a school of over 1000 so they are all eating early or late and spending most of one break in a queue.

Too many are feeling forced to home ed because school has got so hostile and unrewarding.

I think it’s a brilliant choice if done properly. Mainstream school was not right for my dc and they’ve done so well being home educated. One would have had a breakdown and got no qualifications without the option to be de registered. It makes life so much calmer too removing typical mainstream school times and issues.

I agree with it ideologically. I hate the idea of being forced into an inadequate school whilst being bullied with a string of supply teachers.

I feel parents need the ultimate authority tk withdraw thier chikd and put something better in place.

I do think there shoukd be sime more regulations/expectation in place but there's not the money to do that.

Home ed is on the up and I fully support it. If you don't want that then you should be active in getting all the crap out of the school system.

Would you keep your kid in a school where they're shown books containing images of people in fetish gear? Or do I need to list all the many other problems?

That's before you even get onto the shocking lack of support for the kids with no SEN.

How do you propose to force local authorities to provide an education to SEND children so families aren’t illegally forced into home ed?

I home educated my eldest until he was 10 (went to school in year 5).

Combination of living really rurally and the schools not being great and we had the opportunity to travel a lot with ex dh work.

I did very formal learning with ds, had a tutor come in twice a week for English and maths. We were registered with the local authority and a nice man would come out from them once a year, have a cup of tea, tick some boxes and sod off again. That really didn’t make me popular with other home ed families who saw me as the devil for those things.

I saw some shocking things with other families. It was almost a badge of honor if your kid was 8 and couldn’t read and just spent all day up a tree.

We moved to London the summer before he started year 5 and he went to school - I wouldn’t have contemplated HE and having to start again with groups and sift out all the absolute bellend parents you come across.

I’ve had two other children since who have been to school from the off. I would never consider home ed due to the other parents you meet.

ETA the only time my son ever experienced bullying was at home ed groups. And I can’t stand the “the know children of all ages!” Crap. I used to see miserable 13 years olds have to hang out with 8 year olds while parents would pat themselves on the back and say, “this wouldn’t happen in school!” No. It wouldn’t. They would have had a fighting chance of knowing other children their own age.

I think there needs to be a lot more oversight so kids aren’t falling through the cracks. I think parents need to be able to show what they’re doing, prove they are following some sort of curriculums and for children to have some checks to see how they are developing. If there is neglect (not necessary physical but education being totally neglected) then there should be a mechanism to ensure children are back in normal education. I don’t know to what extent that exists in home education currently.

I am not against HE as a general concept or in a limited capacity. I flexischool my DD1, so she goes to school four days a week and one day we do other stuff, and that works really well. I wouldn’t HE every day and I do think a lot of people who HE are totally out of their depth.

I agree. I know a family that are ‘unschooling’ their 10yo can’t read because he hasn’t asked to learn. How are they meant to become functional adults??

I don’t know how insular it is really, it depends how the parents handle it. Some would argue it’s less insular because they do x and y and as a result meet people from all walks of life rather than just a group of peers and a teacher.

A friend of mine does it, she has pretty much from the start and her eldest is now 16. She’s into horse riding, scouts, plays guitar and volunteers at an animal shelter. I think her life has been good, she’s been exposed to more than lots of school kids are!

I might have agreed with you years ago.I have 6 kids all grown and all been through the school system,I've had kids in school for the best part of 38 years and seen a massive decline over the years, due to this I home educated my daughter for her last 2 years as school were failing her badly .it really wasn't that difficult, without the school environment she absolutely thrived and passed all her GCSEs, which we had to pay for as a private candidate.Shes now at college studying Criminology and Law. The current school system is not fit for purpose in my opinion and parents should be able to opt out if they choose to

Trying to cope in mainstream with the barrage of SEN needs, stretching and challenging the brightest, supporting those at a disadvantage plus EAL kids in one classroom is a challenge, for sure. I can understand why parents feel their child’s needs aren’t always met.

Smaller class sizes, adaptive curriculums (to better meet an SEN child’s needs) and more TAs would all be helpful but there isn’t the funding to implement.

How will they cope in life? It’s easy to think they can’t cope, but many do. A lot of SEN pupils thrive. Most who don’t thrive have parents who do not support the school and who are pandered at home.

I'm not keen on home ed but recognise that sometimes its necessary, when schools can't meet a child's needs so would not want it banned but would want a good level of monitoring as although I'm sure many home educators do a good job there are also those that don't, and those children shouldn't be sacrificed for the comfort and privacy of the parents that are doing well. It will be a bother for the parents but that's better than letting some children miss out on education.

Monitoring is also important for safeguarding. While many home educated children will be out and about huge amounts, see professionals regularly (doctors, dentists, tutors etc.) there will be others that are isolated. Frankly I think it would be good if the UK adopted regular health checks for children, like where I live now - every year at school children get a check up with the nurse and every few years an indepth check up with the doctor. Health conditions, physical and mental, are screened for, blood pressure and scoliosis checks, vision and hearing, and a chance for children to disclose any concerns, worries, or issues. Teachers give their view on how the child copes in class so learning issues and additional needs are screened for every year. This would help all children, those in school and those home educated. (These check ups are also done below school age)

My dd asked to be home educated a few times at the start of secondary. She didn’t cope well at all with mainstream and these were lockdown years, so it would have been worse had she gone full time. I switched her to private school, but she still needed 121 support, so has had lots of private tutoring on top.

Teachers never identified any issues with dd’s learning or any additional needs. Turns out she has SEND and has gone through the entirety of the education system undiagnosed. She’s year 13 and this is all a new discovery. And yes, I did ask people before if they thought dd had any additional needs to be told no and in year 10, all her teachers were all surveyed. Zero issues reported. And I should have trusted my gut, but I deferred to people, who I thought would know better than me.

Had I been physically well, I would have home educated. However, I struggled to look after dd as was so she would not have learned well from me and idk if she’d have been up for constant tutoring.

Of course there are parents, who do a disservice to their children. But to say home education should only be for a narrow set of kids, would be sending kids like my dd into a situation, they can can’t cope with. Until you walk a mile in the shoes of parents, who are genuinely doing their best for their kids, you don’t know what it’s like. On paper, my dd should have been fine at her former state school. But she most definitely was not.

Qualified teacher here. I thought I would home Ed my kids until I had them and realised that parent/child relationship is VERY different from teacher/child. All 3 went to school. All 3 of them have had a rough ride and although attended “good” state schools I think schools are struggling so much and are not a good environment for many many kids (or teachers). One of mine dropped out in Y10 and we have home edded since then. She got 9 GCSEs at 7+ and is on track to get 3 A* at A level. She socialises with her sport, and has some tutoring support. She has ASD but not obviously so. Home Ed is not ideal in many ways but the system is so broken for so many kids a huge number of them feel they have no choice. We have been trying to get an EHCP for our DD for years but the seven circles of hell doesn’t begin to describe that process. I would much rather she were in education that met her needs, but it’s just not there. Although there are perhaps some who are choosing HE and then neglecting their kids, I would guess there are a vast majority struggling with the school system and that is the main reason. I know five families in my wider circle where at least one child cannot attend school and they are all sick with worry and trying to support their kids (mostly with ND and/or physical or mental health challenges).

I'm not a fan of home ed, but can understand that for some children it is the 'least worst' option. Schools need to sort themselves out. The learning environment they provide for children is just awful in many cases - stressful, boring, non-nurturing, confrontational, layered with unreasonable expectations.

Getting rid of compulsory, uncomfortable uniforms including blazers and ties would be a start and would make school instantly more accessible to children with sensory issues.

@Freshton I also 100% agree with you about the necessity of getting different perspectives which you will only get by mixing with different people (teachers and students). It's the base for critical thinking.

I was "forced" to home educate my ASD son for almost 2 years (y8-y9) because he had a mental breakdown. It was extremely difficult. I had to study core subjects in the evening in order to try to teach them during the day to my mentally fragile son with mild learning disabilities. I think it was easier for him to understand 1:1 but I almost had a breakdown myself just teaching Maths, English and History. Thank God his mental health improved somewhat and that he got a place in SENE afterwards which was more adapted to his needs.

@Freshton YANBU

Bad home Ed just like bad schools produces a bad outcome for kids.

good home Ed like good schools produce good outcomes.

it’s all in how you do it.

the family I know who did it - did it well. Very low income family - 3 kids but mum dedicated herself to home Ed.

she joined a local home Ed group and the children socialised with them and did group activities and sports etc with them . they pooled resources and talent and shared this with the kids

they went to libraries and museums and were avid readers of both fiction (literature) and factual stuff - they didn’t use set curriculums in earlier years - following the kids interests to inspire them but you never met more rounded and interesting young people who were well educated in traditional subjects but also the arts and culture etc.

All passed GCSE’s and a levels and are amazing young people who really are social and definitely had a broader and more stimulating education than they would have received in our local state schools and without all the peer pressure and drama of 35 in a class .

I appreciate not all home Ed is of this calibre but you have to also appreciate that school is often very low calibre. So often kids are left behind or not able to learn due to behaviour issues and distractions of other students or the bullying culture or lack of resources and sometimes even bad teachers. Many are out sounding but not all are. .

i don’t think one system is better than the other intrinsically - it is so dependant on the philosophy and commitment and skill of individuals that make a good school or good home educator.

I’m having to temporarily home school until July when DD goes to high school due to SEN & bullying. But oh my god I’m not cut out for teaching nor do I remember 80% of what I was taught! I thought it’d be as simple as reading out questions and marking with a calculator but ohhhhh no! Have had to employ a tutor. Believe me it wasn’t an easy decision but an absolutely necessary one. My point is, it’s terrifying to think of parents with very little education themselves or those who simply aren’t very clever, are actually choosing to do this! Terrifying and baffling in equal measure.

Mean numbers, anyone?

If you think that is bad, a lot of schools are teaching young children they can change sex and if they identify with regressive stereotypes associated with the opposite sex then they should demand everyone believe they are the opposite sex. This crap has even got as far as schools ignoring safeguarding and the law to allow boys to strip off in front of girls or take part in girls sport.

If I’m completely honest I think some people shouldn’t be allowed to home school but I should. Hypocritical.

l’m very academic with some teaching experience (tho not with young kids). I wanted to go faster than my school (selective) could accommodate, I wish I’d had the option to focus more on what I liked and less on what I didn’t, I’d like to give my kids that option if they want it. And honestly I think I’d do a better job for my own kids than many teachers would in most subjects (bearing in mind that I’m comparing teaching one vs 30, teaching as a profession is hard) and I could afford tutoring for the subjects I can’t teach.

Still, I get the fear around it and the potential for abuse. It makes school effectively optional. Which could make sense — I’m not personally convinced that increasing the length of compulsory education has been beneficial for all — but then we need to debate and decide that as a society and make sure there are other good paths. I’d love to see more alternative education options, more practical and vocational paths earlier, more adult education if you want to return to the academic path later. But all of that needs thinking about. An option to pull your kids from school with no real plan for their future is all kinds of dumb.

Oh great, yet another home ed bashing thread 🙄🙄🙄

Although, seems I meet your approval as a qualified teacher and child with SEN. Thanks, much appreciated 🙄🙄🙄