AIBU to stay in the UK rather than move back to Switzerland?

People in the UK love talking about how terrible it is here. It is one of their more endearing characteristics.

The only place they consistently think is worse, is the place I come from (USA).

OP, enjoy beautiful, openminded, kindhearted Britain... I know it is far from perfect, and there are a lot of terrible people about- to paraphrase Churchill: It is the worst place to live, except for all the others.

Im kind of shocked to read your post to be honest.
You can't really think that England is lovely and welcoming to all foreigners? That is not the reality at all.

Or they are full of shit.

Im sorry but if you are English yourself, how could you possibly know what it is like for people that move from other countries to England? That is ridiculous.

I was born In england. My family then moved to another country, and I grew up there. I have an accent from another country. I moved back to England a couple of years ago as I wanted to experience living here for a while.

Since moving to England I have been told to

"Fuck off home"
I have been Asked " if i was over here taking their jobs". I said "I was born in England actually ". The man said "you don"t fu*king sound like it!"

I work with a Chinese woman and she said that she stopped going to local groups in the English town as they are so nasty to her. She said that one of them made fun of how she speaks etc...

I live in the South East. I have heard that people in the North are meant to be friendlier. But it seems strange to think that a whole region could be unfriendly!

It doesn’t matter where you’re from, there are some people who believe life is better there.

My husband is American, but has lived in the UK for decades. Except during the Trump years, it is common for people to tell him he’s mad to live here, that if they had the chance they’d live in the US (they never have), to be confused that I lived in the US and ‘gave that up’ (they have no idea what ‘that’ actually is). Friends from other countries tell me they have the same experience.

Honestly, those views are a reflection of other people’s dissatisfaction with aspects of their own lives, and are based in an imaginary grass is greener situation. If you’re happy where you are, stay put.

That’s lovely to hear. English (or British) people, by and large, are very welcoming. I’ve never ever heard the opposite from people (I’m English myself). I can’t imagine where those people settled themselves, but unless they were giving very hostile vibes to their English neighbours, it is not our culture to be unfriendly to a new person for no reason. We’re not famous for putting on the kettle and making tea for nothing 😂 Ironically, when I moved to Switzerland I was told I’d never make a Swiss friend - they weren’t wrong 😁 I’m southern and we are also friendly. Maybe not as famously as the North but we are still very approachable and can chat easily to strangers.

Can you go and see some local secondary schools in England? The whole system will be different to what you know and for your DS education you need to take a long view and decide where you feel is best all the way through to university or apprenticeships. Personally I moved "home" when DD was finished primary as I wanted her to have a different secondary school experience.

TBH plenty of Brits - usually those who’ve never lived anywhere else - will think that just about anywhere must be better than the UK.
Follow your own feelings as far as practical and ignore them.

Really? English people unwelcoming? That’s news to me.

I am British, but also have Australian and European citizenship. People are always saying I should move abroad. But I live in a lovely part of the UK and have a great life. I sometimes think that I should be moving to give my children a better future, but actually if you've given children a good education the world is their oyster, particularly if they also have citizenship of other countries. There's no need to move pre-emptively just in case.

OP, I would decide based on what you actually want in the near future. It sounds like you don't have a strong pull to go home at the moment but you can reassess that in a few years - perhaps when your son is 9 or 10 and coming up to secondary school.

To me, spending every summer there sounds like a great balance. When he's older, your son will have the choice to go to university or live in Switzerland if he wants to and you are keeping that choice open by teaching him the language and keeping him connected with Swiss family/culture. Lucky him!

I used to live in Switzerland, would love to go back but can’t.

As you like where you live can’t you just stay and go back to Switzerland in the future if you want. It sounds like you have the best of both worlds, a nice life here and a future in Switzerland should you ever want it. I mean when your son is over 18. I wouldn’t move him to a close-minded little alpine village.

I wouldn’t go OP - sounds like your heart isn’t in it

Yes I know it really well - so it’s not an unknown - like everywhere it has it’s down points but for me the up points balance it up -

It’s a stunning country but it’s also only 90 mins on a cheap flight away. You can go and visit frequently and enjoy it without living there.

I went to an international secondary school in Geneva and then uni in the UK if it helps and I think the transition was ok. Could your son go to an international school as follow on from UK primary in a few years?

Surely even the remotest valleys aren't that far from a city in Switzerland? or on the excellent train system? Maybe its bigger than I remember 😁

Will be hard to move without compelling reasons I think as you are happy here. Holiday home in the Alps?

Could you not go to one of the more cosmopolitan cities, Geneva, Zurich etc, drivable distance to home area?

If you have to go now, what's the rush?

They have all been here since DC young and had plenty of opportunity to go back but none have 🙂

I nannied there and have been quite a few times with work and I agree- it’s near bottom of my list of places I would pick to live. It’s ludicrously expensive ( and I’ve lived in Copenhagen ) it’s dull unless you ski and it’s the kind of place where people shut shop doors on me because they were having lunch - however I guess it would suit some, especially if you like skiing, snowboarding etc . As it happens we’ve got our freelance visas in for Germany and are looking at moving to Düsseldorf/cologne/Bonn area. Germany has the things I do value like good health care ( not cheap and pay in) but that area does have the outdoorsy stuff that suits me, river walks, lakes, good walking and the biggest Japanese area for food in Europe in Duss and a fantastic indoor food market, Still has life, events, great connections and airport (x 2) the river , great shopping, a big mix of people - I felt Switzerland was all a bit sterile ‘for me’ and Germany far far cheaper.