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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to say no to grandparents taking children abroad?

137 replies

Melissax90 · 08/05/2026 17:57

Hi everyone
I am looking for some options on something.
I have a DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) and my in-laws have asked my opinion on letting them take them abroad on their own, specifically to Spain. I wholeheartedly trust them completely and know they would be completely safe but still for me it is a hard no. I don't like the idea of them being in a different country especially if they needed me and I couldn't get there quickly.
My partner has said its completely my decision but he seemed quite open to the idea and although he hasn't said it I think he might feel I am being unreasonable.
So just for piece of mind, what does everyone think?
My decision is no and won't change but I'm just intrigued to see others options
x

OP posts:
Lomonald · 08/05/2026 18:07

I think they are too young to be away without their parents i think they would miss you and you are likely to fret, can't you all go and the grandparents can take them out and about,?

CurbsideProphet · 08/05/2026 18:06

I have a 3.5 year old and I couldn't imagine him being taken to a different country without me, he's too little. He's never had a night away from me, though tbf grandparents have not offered as they don't want to be woken up at 6am 😀

TomatoSandwiches · 08/05/2026 18:04

No I wouldn't be comfortable with those ages either, I think both at primary school is a time to revisit it.
Could you go together for the first few times?

bugalugs45 · 08/05/2026 18:03

That's a very young age , my parents took my daughter abroad for a week though at age 5 ( almost 6 ) but they have a great relationship , see each other really often ,
and it helps that she’s not a clingy child and never has been .

Waitingatlidl · 08/05/2026 18:03

I wouldn’t hesitate in saying “thank you but no”.

Not a cat’s chance in hell would anyone be taking my children that age abroad without me present

AgualusasL0ver · 08/05/2026 18:02

I think they are prob a little too young. We have done it, but it was somewhere I have been going since childhood and know very very well and I went with them but left them for the rest of the summer, DS1 did it solo when he was maybe 8 and then with his brother when they were 8 and 10. I think it might have been a lot for my parents too when they were younger.

Only you know your kids though and if it doesnt sit right, then it doesnt sit right.

Duvetdayneeded · 08/05/2026 18:02

How old are the grandparents?

ClaredeBear · 08/05/2026 18:01

I’d suggest working towards something in the coming years, personally. It’s great you trust them and have a good relationship and it would be useful if your husband backed you up on this. If you’re not comfortable just don’t do it as they are very young.

tonyhawks23 · 08/05/2026 18:00

Yes all go,defo not the kids without you,that makes no sense.

DwarfPalmetto · 08/05/2026 18:00

Maybe it's entirely irrational, but I wouldn't feel comfortable either, especially when they are so little.

Dartmoorcheffy · 08/05/2026 17:59

Cant you all go. You and your partner could enjoy some free time on your own as they are clearly happy to take charge of the kids

Peonies12 · 08/05/2026 17:59

Definitely not at that age, I wouldn’t even consider it. Maybe once theyre young teens.