Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to find my husband's constant undressing at home annoying?

569 replies

saamantha19881 · 08/05/2026 16:49

My husband has asked me to post on here to guage opinions.
The minute he gets in the door he takes his top off, often- his trousers too and will just be wearing pants. He says it is more comfortable.

I'm starting to find it really annoying, once in a while if it's really hot it makes sense. But it is literally all summer and winter. It means he can't ever answer the door, just pop into the garden or grab something from the car. And to be honest, I just don't like it.

Apparently it is completely normal (his dad did it too) and he thinks I would be surprised because everyone does this in their own homes??

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Owly11 · 10/05/2026 10:02

Urgh sounds gross. I would find that hard to live with. Can't he at least put on some light weight shorts and a t shirt?

Hankunamatata · 10/05/2026 10:00

Odd. Put some shorts on!!!

Theuntold · 10/05/2026 09:52

NotAnotherScarf · 09/05/2026 22:02

But I've got a pair of shorts that, basically you can't tell the difference...I never ever wear them and I am dreading going to France next month where I can only wear trunks in the pool

Show quote history

You’re a man with a pair of shorts that are no different to a pair or underpants @NotAnotherScarf ?

Please, please, for the sake of others, bin these shorts

Debtdolly · 10/05/2026 09:26

It sounds very much like a sensory thing OP.

DP does this, although now the kids are older he will put shorts or joggers on but very rarely has a top on at home (he is also always HOT). He has ADHD.

DS (teen) is very self conscious so he doesn’t go naked but he’s straight into PJs the second he gets home from school. He will also never wear trousers as they feel “weird on his knees”. He has ASD and ADHD.

DD will sleep in knickers only all year round, even winter. She gets very hot and sweaty at night. Shes been doing this since she was about 8/9 if not younger. She also has many other sensory issues around clothes (I once spent a fortune trying to find a style of knickers that would feel comfortable under trousers for her, and when we finally did I had to bulk buy!!) No diagnosis but there are other reasons why I’ve begun suspecting she has ADHD.

DPs dad is also always in pants!!

So I’m not suggesting your DH is neurodivergent, because I’m sure neurotypical people also have sensory quirks. This is more to highlight some people genuinely feel uncomfortable in clothes. Perhaps you need to try and compromise some way.

I do get how annoying it is when you are the one who always has to get the door though!! Although my DP would go to the bins/garden top less without a second thought, our lucky neighbours 🤣

MrsJeanLuc · 10/05/2026 09:24

NotAnotherScarf · 08/05/2026 16:55

And the difference between pants and shorts is...

I worked with a woman who couldn't function at home unless she was in joggers and a tee shirt

Show quote history

Let me draw you a diagram 🙄🙄🙄

The gentleman referred to will be wearing shorts OVER his underpants

Theuntold · 10/05/2026 09:13

cantgardenintherain · 10/05/2026 08:14

Around older children it’s potentially dodgy.

And imagine if they bring home friends spontaneously as mine often do

Myli1 · 10/05/2026 08:27

suburberphobe · 09/05/2026 21:33

Well, of course I change from work clothes into home clothes after picking up my son as a solo mum when I have to cook dinner for us both.

It"s life.

Same as getting up in the morning, school and work.

Better that than a violent man in the house.

Sorry if you're going through that OP.

Please reach out to your GP.

“Reach out to your GP”? Are you for real? It’s hard enough as it is getting a GP appointment without people wasting their doctor’s time moaning about their husband’s underwear!

cantgardenintherain · 10/05/2026 08:14

Around older children it’s potentially dodgy.

NothinLeftToTax · 10/05/2026 07:30

FriendlyMedusa · 10/05/2026 02:32

So did you think everyone just stripped off when they got home?
Yeah, or maybe most people but not all. DH is the same - If it's cold I'll change into a dressing gown and blanket.

We don't have kids (yet) - Obviously then I'll upgrade to at least pants and a t-shirt.

My question is - Are you lot sitting at home fully dressed??

Show quote history

Fully dressed or in pjs/dressing gown as a minimum until I get in the shower.
My husband was a little light in clothing at home but once we had the children I made it clear I expected a decent amount of clothing at all times! Especially once children are older and having friends over, no-one wants to be the kid with the naked dad at home.
I don't get what is so difficult, lounge wear is comfortable and relatively cheap to get hold of 🤷‍♀️

Andthatmyfriendisthat · 10/05/2026 03:49

He can just wear loose, comfortable clothes. Like a normal person.

Ifallelsefails · 10/05/2026 03:00

2O26 · 09/05/2026 20:35

Does he put a towel down where he sits? I am not sure I would want his bare arse sitting on the furniture.

Show quote history

🤣🤣🤣🤣

FriendlyMedusa · 10/05/2026 02:32

diddl · 09/05/2026 17:31

I'm sorry for your predicament OP but this has really tickled me, because I read this thread in full agreement with your DH that nakey is normal and everyone does it.

I would have thought that for most people it isn't as they wouldn't be warm enough.

So did you think that everyone just stripped off when they got home?

So did you think everyone just stripped off when they got home?
Yeah, or maybe most people but not all. DH is the same - If it's cold I'll change into a dressing gown and blanket.

We don't have kids (yet) - Obviously then I'll upgrade to at least pants and a t-shirt.

My question is - Are you lot sitting at home fully dressed??

SemiRetiredLoveGoddeess · 10/05/2026 00:24

This sounds awful. Get him to wear a string vestas well Rab C Nesbit style.

Sounds like a real.munter.

Wednesday505 · 09/05/2026 23:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

auserna · 09/05/2026 22:57

MaryBeardsShoes · 08/05/2026 16:52

My dad did this and it was awful growing up in the house with him. He often didn’t wear pants either. God I hated it!

Pants as in underpants? Or American trousers?

Endorewitch · 09/05/2026 22:49

whywonthelisten · 08/05/2026 16:57

My flatmate used to joke about the speed at which I used to get changed into my joggers when I got home from work. She's turn around to get a drink and when she turned back I'd be changed, like superman 😂

Edited
Show quote history

Bht you were wearibg jiggers.
Nkt running around in your knickers!

ScaredButUnavoidable · 09/05/2026 22:42

Theuntold · 09/05/2026 21:29

You’d love it even if it made your kids uncomfortable?

Show quote history

Where has OP said that her kids find it uncomfortable?

BatchCookBabe · 09/05/2026 22:39

Discodance1988 · 09/05/2026 22:33

Read the comments of outraged women who are crying about their partner being in a state of undress in their own homes....

Show quote history

🙄 Yeah, because that's EXACTLY what is happening on here. 🙄

DetectiveDouche · 09/05/2026 22:35

Arlanymor · 08/05/2026 16:58

"Jackie, my nipples are roasting!"

Just keep a dressing gown near to the door. Presumably it's only the fact that it prohibits him from answering the door that bothers you?

I was just preparing to typing this! 😆🤣 Aww Martin bless him. RIP to the actor

Discodance1988 · 09/05/2026 22:33

Theuntold · 09/05/2026 21:30

Has anyone said they hate seeing their partner topless?

Show quote history

Read the comments of outraged women who are crying about their partner being in a state of undress in their own homes....

Nearly50omg · 09/05/2026 22:14

saamantha19881 · 08/05/2026 17:13

He wears those very small skin right boxers

GRIM!!!! Your children don’t need to see that!!! NO ONE DOES! It’s performative and he thinks he’s clearly more attractive than he is! 🤢🤮🤮🤮

Canaryringer · 09/05/2026 22:13

2O26 · 09/05/2026 21:58

"Nudist camp rules include always carrying a towel to sit on". At the bare minimum (no pun intended) your husband should sit on a towel -no bare arses sitting on the furniture.

Edited
Show quote history

He would if it was with other naturists. It's usually just on his own chair.

Nearly50omg · 09/05/2026 22:13

Why doesn’t he wear shorts then? He can answer the door and do all the other things with a pair of shorts on? unless he’s not got the body to be seen without a top on? 😂

UncannyFanny · 09/05/2026 22:10

saamantha19881 · 08/05/2026 17:13

He wears those very small skin right boxers

So what? What is it about them you don’t like? I mean break this right down. What is the actual problem with it? Are you having dinner parties every evening? What is the actual issue with him being comfortable in a way that he wants to do it? And what would your reaction be if this was the other way round?

BatchCookBabe · 09/05/2026 22:07

AlwaysHungry123 · 09/05/2026 21:05

My parents walked around in underwear and I hated it. My mum would walk around in her night dress with nothing under even in front of my partner, I told her to put some bra or dressing gown on. I’m completely opposite because of how my parents were in front of me and my brother.

Show quote history

OMG that's such weird behaviour, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Flowers

Swipe left for the next trending thread