AIBU to wonder if a stay-at-home mum could become an MP?

Why are you so against working parents, especially women? Just because a child is at nursery, doesn't mean they receive any less love and care from parents. Equally, having a stay at home parent doesn't guarantee that teens won't get into trouble. What kind of distorted thinking is that?

There was a reason why previous generations of women fought for more equality - the "traditional families" just weren't working for them.

They wanted their financial independence. They wanted not to be trapped in unhappy relationships because they couldn't afford to leave. They wanted to have the same opportunities as men to use their talents and fulfill their potential. They wanted to live their own lives on their own terms and not merely as service providers for those around them. They wanted change.

I am enormously grateful for the fact that I have been able to model a different kind of family set-up from the one which my DM unwillingly ended up modelling for me. I have been able to show her first-hand that it is possible for women to combine a successful and fulfilling career with being a loving, engaged and hands-on mother. I have been able to show her that it's normal and natural for mothers to have interests, responsibilities and identities which extend beyond the home. I have been able to show her that it's entirely possible to find men who are willing to step up and do their fair share of parenting and domestic labour. I have been able to show her that she doesn't have to choose between pursuing her own aspirations and having a happy, functional family.

My dd is brilliant and talented and ambitious. I want her to be free to dream big and leave her mark on the world. Not to be confined to a "traditional family" role which she neither desires nor values.

I have stood for Parliament (and was a SAHM at the time). I'd also been heavily involved in local politics for years - I'm now fully recovered.

Setting aside what I think of your personal politics, I'd suggest you start by joining the political party you would like to represent and get involved in some of there campaigning then take it from there.

One of the reasons political parties are so shocking at the moment is because enough decent people don't put themselves out there, although I do understand why. I remember a time when there was genuine respect for political opponents and an understanding that most were in it for the right reasons.

I stood for the district council when only 32 and with a young family - and was elected. I was a stay at home mum at the time, but went back to work about a year later.

I never planned to go into politics, but was heavily involved in my local community and had successfully run a huge and very publicised campaign to save a much loved local facility. As a result I was very well known locally. Following the successful conclusion of the campaign all the three main parties approached me to ask me to stand for them. It was a hard decision as I wasn’t party savvy at all, so asked each the same question - if I stood for you could I vote according to my conscience or must I vote on party lines? Both Labour and LD said it had to be on party lines but the Conservatives said I could vote according to my conscience as long as I gave a bit of notice - even only 10 minutes would be fine. So I stood as a Conservative, and was elected (but indeed did vote several times with the opposition).

So yes it is possible but - you first need to decide your party, and pay to become a member; then you need to make a bid for a local seat - and get adopted for that seat - and finally you need to win your election.

Do some research on your local council. You can often watch the meetings on line. Look at what wards or division there are, what the last few election results were, (if standing for party A be realistic if party B is the one likely to win) and check what committees they have. Follow the committee meetings - see what you can offer because if selected you will be expected to have some ideas what you might campaign about.

it will help you enormously if you are known locally. You also need to get out and about for your party- helping deliver leaflets, canvassing etc and helping out in other areas too with their elections so you get known and ‘learn your trade’. An election campaign in very hard work and you have to keep your energy up throughout.

If you are in a more rural area then a good way in is a through a parish council. These are non political (unlike the town councils - which still run under parish council rules - but which are usually political).

I love it when folks get involved in politics, the more the better as that’s best for our community - and it’s so rewarding being able to help your local community and to make a difference,

I voted for a SAHM for MP in the latest federal election. I liked her policies, she was from a party I support, and she was well-spoken and articulate.

This is one of the problems I have with Reform, as well as the Republicans in the US.

They advocate a return to "traditional families" which sounds great in some ways.

But they aren't offering any state financial assistance with this, so it's only possible if you have 1 higher earner (usually the man). And the non-working wife then has no savings or work history, so the man can be as abusive or controlling as he likes, because if the woman leaves him she will be destitute.

Yep, adhd here and have always worked too.

And contrary to your viewpoint, having engaged working parents is positive to a child's development. That's why children with parents who don't work and are home on benefits are allocated pupil premium, to try to narrow the achievement gap between those with working parents and those without.

It's been shown that part time high quality childcare from age of 2 creates better outcomes vs children being at home, which is why for many years there has been free childcare places from 2 for low income/non working parents.

I worked part time from when my girls were each 18 months, around their pre school places. I worked my job around them (which I was fortunate to be able to do) and they have in no way missed out by me working, on the contrary it has both set a positive example to them of need to work hard to progress, and funded greater opportunities for them.

Listen to Jess Phillips’ audio book (or read it, I listened 😂) - that’s pretty much her story.

OP I just don't think your vision for families matches your vision for finances.

Would we all like to afford to have more time at home with our kids - sure!

But the average family (low to middle earners) cannot afford to have only 1 parent working, even with tax breaks.

So are you advocating that the tax breaks will only be possible for families with 1 high earner?

If not, would you be advocating paying benefits to the non-working parent to allow them to stay at home? Or that the government pays for a 2 year maternity/paternity leave for example?

Please do answer because I'd like to see how this works in practice

No I’m just curious for personal reasons, I had children young and also have a big age gap between my children

I have anxiety and ADHD and I have always worked.

I wouldn't vote for someone who had never had a job. I'd go further and say that MPs should have some specific expertise to offer. That might include bankers, farmers, social workers, doctors, teachers, builders, diplomats or any skill acquired from working in the real world.
Far too many MPs have moved into politics from university and only really know about "politics".
You have one topic that interests you. Why not work in a field which helps women? Someone suggested working with domestic violence victims, that might open your eyes.

You really are pretty misinformed.

There is growing research that ADHD is linked to several autoimmune conditions (such as arthritis, asthma, diabetes, hypothyroidism)

My daughter was diagnosed with coeliac disease a couple years ago, and her paediatrician asked lots of questions around her attention, learning, emotional stability etc and explained there is a strong correlation between coeliac disease and ADHD. We noticed an improvement in her focus when she came off gluten. He felt that every child diagnosed with ADHD should be tested for coeliac disease, as well as other linked conditions. But he has struggled to make headway on this as its seen as medicalising ADHD, which is not a popular viewpoint.

No, she’ll just blame them for poor family values, mental health problems and any other societal problems. Batshit!

Or because it doesn't suit you to answer them.

The main focus of the thread seems to be thinly disguised attacks on benefits and disability anyway.

Otoh OP said she supports SAHPs. So presumably she'd support a SAHD and working mum.

I dont see why being a SAHM has anything to do with it? If it interests you, you meet minimal job requirements and you think you could do it, then go for it, same with any job.

I agree with most of this but why would you never vote for a SAHM? Do you thunk it's wrong to be one? They presumably would have other experience of life via work or volunteering if they ran as an MP...

Good question!

I don't see any issues with a SAHM having a job like this, seems sexist to oppose it.

The OP's issues go beyond being a SAHM

No but they are penalised if they don’t.

How would you balance the demands of a job the requires frequent evening and weekend working and long working hours with the desire for your children to have a SAHP - would your husband give up work?