Thought on this? DS school situation..

He spent 5 minutes catching up on the work he missed? If he hadn't, when do you propose he does it? Or would you just email about him being allowed to fall behind his peers?

I swear teachers can't win these days.

Eh? Fobbed off? Asked and replied.

Teacher states he completed the work, so what’s the issue? Next time he’ll get straight to it, won’t he?!

fgs drama over nothing!

Same. Wait till he hits secondary school, she'll be a constant feature, faced pressed against the window 😆

Perfect response from the teacher. I would drop it. There is literally nothing happening here.

I’m 50. Wednesday morning assembly the prefect lined up in front to whole school whispered in the head teachers ear. If it was your name whispered you walked up the front. If it had been a positive report whispered you got some house points, negative you lost points and usually a slap round the legs.

if you annoyed a teacher you’d be sent down to the heads office. Waited outside with other variously snivelling or defiant kids taken in one by one bent over and hit with a plimsol,

Another teacher would test the aerodynamic properties or board rubbers collection boxes, chairs if she took a dislike to the way you looked at her.

Schools are definitely not too harsh these days, they are usually making up for shit gentle parenting, I’d argue schools need to be a lot stricter

DD had a similar situation a few months ago (no ADHD just a chatterbox) and she came home and complained to me. I don’t think losing 5 min of break actually addresses the situation but at the end of the day I told her next time she will remember to ask for help when she’s struggling. I would let it go OP.

He lost 5 minutes so not even a lot of his break time and he didn't tell her what the problem was. She's given you a reasonable response and said she'll have a chat with him about it. You need to work on getting him to speak up. You can't be angry at his teacher for not reading his mind.
Does he really forget his homework/reading book or does he just not want to do it? Need to get him in to the habit of doing it anyway. If you don't start pushing him a bit now he'll be loosing a lot more than 5 minutes break when he starts secondary school.

Supporting your son does not mean shielding him from every event which displeases him on some level.

Yeah I mean, I'm 40 and I remember board rubbers being thrown at primary students and a lot of nasty remarks (they weren't allowed to hit us then) in fact most of the teachers I remember were pretty horrible to us. A few nice ones but there was definitely a lot of aggression at all ages. There's a few niggles at my dds school but I've been pleasantly surprised by teachers these days as a whole.

One of the many things I learned at school was that occasionally I was punished for things outside my control or not my fault. It was an important life lesson for me. I would have cringed myself inside out had my parents intervened.

Or the kid could just get on with the lesson a bit more quickly or ask the teacher not to wipe the board? Seriously there are 30 kids in the class and the teacher can’t be “differentiating” in all cases unless there is an agreement adjustment under the Equality act or really clear need. Remember there is no diagnosis here and in fact the child did get the questions and finish the work in the time given.

Also ADHD doesn’t mean that you need huge amounts of differentiation in most cases and certainly not to this level- which is most unlikely to be repeated when the child goes into work/ uni etc.

I'm a retired secondary teacher, but I still do a bit of voluntary teaching in the primary schools where I'm a governor. The capacity of some children (without SEND, I might add) to waste time is quite astonishing - it's like a special skill they've honed!

Sadly for the teacher, I doubt this is just the start.

Ask the teacher to provide him with the questions on a sheet of paper or a writing frame. She needs to differentiate for him rather than punish him.

Another reason he may be struggling is hearing and eyesight. Has he had a recent check on these.

Break. Time. Clues in the name.

Is this is a one off then I would let it go, you’ve already spoken to your DS and the teacher. If it becomes a pattern then I would raise the concerns with the SENCo as it sounds like your son needs some support. Teacher are humans and managing 30 children so don’t always get it right, but this is fairly minor IMO.

Well, this is it. I know schools used to be like that at one time, but thought the teaching profession may have moved on somewhat in 50 years. It seemed like they had, but then things have gone backwards in the last 15 years or so.

You'd end with nearly all parents requesting a diagnosis.

Oh fgs. Please leave this go.

100% this.

Also, 95% of the time students don’t get an easy, straightforward task completed, it’s because they are chatting, distracting themselves and others, deliberately procrastinating or pissing about. Teachers can almost always tell the difference between a struggling student (SEN or non-SEN) and a student who’s just not doing it. So many children use the “I didn’t have enough time/I was struggling to understand” as a get out of free card because it absolves them of all responsibility.

So many children who are slow writers or take a disproportionately longer time to do tasks, don’t understand they don’t have the luxury of yapping before or during a task before in order to get it done because they are slower so can’t afford to waste time. Children who have fast processing speeds and fast writing skills do have this luxury. They can afford to yap. For slower or struggling SEND students, the yapping should come post-task, not pre. They need to understand this trade-off.

Also, this growing sentiment amongst some people that SEND students can’t be lazy, naturally low ability, nasty, a bully, misbehaved, make deliberately poor choices or do things wrong out of conscious choice so they should never be held accountable or reprimanded (however minor and insignificantly) for anything ever is utterly bizarre and baseless. Both neurodivergent and neurotypical people are capable of all the above!

My ds was always forgetting stuff, not getting tasks completed on time etc. He is dyslexic, with a little adhd thrown in, and he was inclined to chat, faff, and daydream, so if he was told to stay behind for 5 mins I wouldn't have a problem with it, if that's what it takes thats what it takes. Now that he is finished school he manages to get to work on time and complete tasks and no longer forgets his jacket, keys or coat. I think the teachers response was very reasonable, and your son needs to be encouraged to ask for help or extra time when needed, and if he misses a few minutes of break to catch up so be it. If you think he has adhd, are you pursuing a diagnosis?

Hmmm... I had a similar situation but my child is only 5 and in Year 1. I would be very concerned if my child didn't do his work or listen to the teacher at 9 years old. Being this age, he should raise his hand and tell the teacher if he struggled. Kids are being taught to do this in Early Years.

OP - do your son a favour and teach him to respect the teacher and to get on with things. He shouldn't be complaining to you about every tiny incident, and you should keep out of this kind of thing. Don't get involved unless it appears to be something serious. This kind of everyday incident is just part of growing up and not always being under your mother's wing.
Can you imagine being a teacher if every parent got worked up and made a big fuss over every tiny little issue that arises during a school day? Let the poor woman do her job, for the benefit of your son and others.
If he's complained to you about this and expects you to do something about it, that suggests that you're teaching him to be an entitled complainer. That will do him no favours in life. You should be talking to him about his responsibility - eg to try to work a bit faster if he doesn't want to miss any break. Making everything someone else's fault will not help him.

Also the people on this thread saying “he doesn’t have ADHD so he deserves punishing” are probably the exact same people that moan “everyone wants a diagnosis”. No wonder people want official diagnoses for their kids if that is the only way kids actually get support.